Category: Opinion

Polishing Your Horns Won’t Make You A Star

They say a little competition is a good thing. I believe the expression is “healthy competition.” Although this can be fine as long as that competition is for the purposes of fun and is only a game. The problem begins when one’s need for competition extends beyond fun and games and drips into everyday life. If you compete against others in life, you’ll find yourself walking a very lonely path; even if you’re not alone.

The goal of life should be to eliminate suffering; suffering in one’s own life and suffering in other peoples’ lives. If you compete against others for the purposes of personal advancement, comparing yourself to others or for gain, such as money, popularity or status, the only outcome will be suffering. Status in life means nothing. And let’s not mistake status for success; those are two very different things and success can be measured by the efforts and goals you set for oneself. Status is how outside people see you in relation to personal gain. Not so great.

Back in the 1990’s (yes, I’m old) I had my wisdom teeth removed. While I was laid up for a day or two on Tylenol 3’s, I rented a handful of movies to watch. Yes, this was back during a time when you had to actually walk into a retail location, provide your personal information and borrow a playable tape (not DVD) in order to watch it at home. Anyway, I decided to binge on a particular series and rented every Rocky movie I could find. I was a pretty big Sylvester Stallone fan, so it was a no-brainer. There were four movies out, at the time.

When I got to Rocky IV, one of the things I was most amazed with was the soundtrack. One would think that I would have been inspired by the lesson behind the movie, but you can only watch Stallone lose, train and make a comeback then finally defeat one’s enemy before the movies kind of all blend together. Anyway, there’s a song by Survivor called “Burning Heart.” The song was released in 1985, the same year as Rocky IV came out. The movie has some undertones that’s suggestive that the message relates to the Cold War and if I had to guess, I’d say that the song was written specifically for the soundtrack.

Anyway, there’s a particular line in the song that speaks to me and has done so ever since. It goes, “In the warrior’s code, there’s no surrender. Though his body says stop, his spirit cries NEVER! Deep in our soul a quiet ember knows it’s you against you; it’s the paradox that drives us on.” And that’s the message: the true competition is against yourself. Work to be a bit better than you were the day before. Set goals and fight to complete them. As long as you have moved one step closer today than you were yesterday, you’re competing the RIGHT way. But as soon as you compete while comparing yourself to anyone else, the only possible result will be suffering. And that doesn’t work for anybody. Food for thought… ☯️

Trauma And It’s Many Forms

PTSD is no longer the unknown demon that it once was. In recent decades, it’s become better-known and recognize as a genuine illness. And in more ways than one, it’s a physical injury that can actually be measured and seen through medical examination. Unfortunately some people, most people, don’t understand the nature of it, what causes it and often see it as a sig of weakness or someone just complaining about something unpleasant that happened. The truth is much worse and much darker…

I don’t write about my own experiences with PTSD as much as I potentially could. That’s mostly because my methods of coping with my condition somewhat differ from what others would think is effective. Most people lack the time and the patience to learn inner peace and calm, meditation and allow the negative energy to vent out of oneself through martial arts and physical exertion. Modern society enjoys quick, easy solutions. No one believes in playing the long game.

The important thing to remember about PTSD is that it’s subjective. Something that causes a trauma in one person may seem like absolutely nothing or menial to someone else. That’s part of the reason why some people are inclined to ignore or belittle someone when they try to express that their trauma is bothering them or has CAUSED PTSD in them. That’s why no one should ever tell someone else that their trauma isn’t genuine, no matter one’s perspective on whether it SHOULD have affected someone or not. That’s not your choice to make.

The true lesson is to take care of yourself. Find healthy and proper coping mechanisms and stick with them. Talk to someone if you need to and remember that even though it can feel extremely isolating, there are many of us out there and there’s always someone to reach out to. ☯️

The “Eyes” Have It…

I had an interesting change in routine last week, when my eye injections in Saskatoon took place on a Thursday as opposed to a Monday. I have no idea WHY it happened this way; the Monday wasn’t a holiday and my ophthalmologist never indicated he’d be away on that day. Either way, I rather enjoy my ability to see, so I take the appointments when they’re given to me. In this case, it meant that I would need to travel and stay in the city on Thursday night and into Friday morning as opposed to the Monday/Tuesday mix I usually do.

This showed a number of changes, including the fact that the Irish pub I hang out in while my eyes recover, was significantly busier than it usually is on a Monday night. That isn’t great fro someone like me, who prefers to sit in a quiet corner with his beer and binge-watch Netflix while relaxing than hearing a crowd and live music. Most would say, “If you don’t like it then you don’t need to go.” While this is quite true, having almost no ability to see leaves me with limited options for a meal. But I survived. There are worse things in life.

My bigger issue came from my time in the hospital. When I have a scheduled appointment, I make it a point to always be early. I do this for a number of reasons, including getting through sooner if there are cancellations and working through any potential delays. But for my eye injections, my appointments involve a vision text, ocular photographs and freezing BEFORE I have the actual injections. On this occasion, my appointment was scheduled for 3:10 in the afternoon. So, I showed up at 2:30 so that I could pay the cashier (my injections are not covered by my insurance), get through my vision text and ocular photos prior to the actual appointment.

This makes sense in theory. Unfortunately, it only works if other patients follow this concept, as well. Instead, I only got in to my eye exam AT 3:15, minutes after I should have received my injections. I commented on that to the technician who was doing my exam, which she responded that they put patients through in the order of their appointments. Although I tried explaining that I had been here for over forty minutes and should have been put through by now, it fell on deaf ears. One good thing that came out of it and one habit that I’ve gotten into, is asking for the results of my eye pressure test. This involves pushing a small plunger against the surface of the eye to test how much pressure the eyeball is exerting.

Much to my surprise, it’s almost always high. Through careful questions have led to the conclusion that speed-walking to my appointments contribute to that. I was also instructed to loosen my shoulders, take deep breaths and keep my feet on the floor as opposed to on the foot bar. The result is usually much lower pressure readings, which makes me and the medical staff far happier. That being said, my overall wait had me placed into a procedure room more than an hour later than my scheduled appointment. Total bullshit.

It shows a continuous progression of the systemic issues developing within the health care system. I’m just lucky that I’m still able to get my injections and in the hospital I’m used to, from the surgeon I trust. I recently read a news article about a patient who died in the waiting room of a hospital in my home Province of New Brunswick. i read another article where a woman was in chronic pain from an unknown source and her husband drove her to three different hospitals over several hours, just to be told to manage the pain as best she could and see her family doctor the following day. It’s a scary time to get sick.

Ultimately, I got my beer and boneless wings and enjoyed them both while slamming a few episodes of Cobra Kai. need to get boned up before the next part is released in September. But it was just noisy enough and populated enough that I was out and in my hotel room, ready to crash by 8:30 pm. I’m such a party animal. Next time I get scheduled for my injections on a Thursday, I might just stay in my room and order a pizza. Avoid all the hub-bub. ☯️

Rain, Rain, Come And Play…

People have this unfortunate tendency to dislike rain. And I get it. It makes the day greyer, brings one’s mood down and prevents doing anything outdoors. But a solid rain also does a number of positive things. For one thing, rain is an important part of plant growth without which, none of us would be here. Outside of that, there’s something therapeutic about hearing a steady drum of falling rain on the roof of the house or against the windows. If one has the time to sit and listen, rainfall can have a similar effect to white noise and can calm and soothe a person after a long day.

A saturated neighbourhood…

The past week has involved a certain level of heat that I usually have difficulty dealing with. I’m the kind of guy who prefers to sweat over freezing or shovelling snow but it’s like I always used to tell some of my co-workers, it’s easier to add on a sweater than do the opposite. You can only remove so many pieces of clothing before it becomes an HR issue. That’s why I’ve always been a bit more comfortable in cooler climates than during extreme heat. And this past week has seen the hottest weather of the summer. It’s made it hard to be outside for anything without having a hard time breathing and turning into a see-through, sweaty mess.

It’s also seen me sleeping in my basement, since our air conditioner can only do so much. But the rain kicked in a bit during the weekend and during the beginning of the week and it’s gone a long way towards cooling things down. It also helps in keeping my shitty lawn watered so I don’t have to do it. Granted, my lawn is only shitty because I have absolutely no ability to grow things and keep them alive, whatsoever. That sounds pretty bad, considering I have two small children. But I digress…

Hopefully the rain helps with that horrible bald patch I haven’t seeded yet

Falling rain is also an excellent aid when taking a nap. Since I’ll be travelling to Saskatoon for my eye injections today, I likely won’t get to indulge in that. Light knows I didn’t get the chance on the day I took these photos. But if one hears the falling rain while lying down and allowing oneself to relax and fall asleep, it can be incredibly centering and therapeutic. One could almost consider that a form of meditation.

Most people tend to dislike and avoid the rain. Having grown up in the Maritimes, right next to the open bay, have allowed me to sit through some AWESOME rain storms coming in from the ocean. That’s probably why I have a bit of a soft spot for the rain. It elicits good memories and calms me. And we all need a little more of that in our lives. And since it cooled the temperature, I was actually able to sleep in my own bed. That sounds like a win/win… ☯️

Sunday, Lazy Sunday…

Keeping yourself moving is an important aspect of life. Not only is it important for one’s health and fitness goals, it’s also important for one’s mental wellbeing as well as Diabetes control. But as much as health & fitness is important, there’s such a thing as too much of a good thing. This is why we have break days when exercising, why we don’t have karate classes seven days a week and why one needs to allow one’s muscles to recover. The funny thing is, even when our fitness goals are on track, taking a break day tends to make us feel lazy.

Last weekend, our home experienced a ridiculous level of summer heat. I won’t complain about that, since I tend to bitch about the cold during the winter… That’s pretty much the definition of humanity, right there. The grass always seems greener during the other season. But the temperatures have made it somewhat difficult to take a full breath while standing outside. We made our way to an outdoor splash pad with the boys on Friday evening, which was wonderful despite the heat. But Saturday saw us running errands in air conditioned environments and retail locations.

Weekends tend to fly by for us, with the majority of our time spent trying to do something fun with our sons coupled with trying to meal plan, exercise and get some much-anticipated television binging in. It tends to make the two days I have off go past as though I were standing still. But once in a while, you need to control the flow of time and simply sit still, which is what we did last Sunday. Sunday morning saw us sleeping in until just shy after 9 am, which is pretty late in my household. My morning started like almost every other, with a cold, 473mL can of caffeine. We started by watching an episode of “The Flash” on Netflix and we had plans to go out and do our weekly groceries.

I threw together a pan of breakfast hash browns mixed with peppers and bacon crumble, seasoned with dill powder and seasoning salts. I make that sound WAY fancier than it actually was. But it’s delicious and has become a staple of our weekends. Once we finished eating and were watching television, my wife and I both agreed that neither one of us wanted to leave the house or run any errands. Given that the temperatures reached the 30’s (Celsius) before the noon hour, it was no surprise that both of us wanted to stay in the relative cool shade of our house. We watched our show for the next few hours until the toddler started showing signs that it was nape time.

We put Alexander down for a nap and provided Nathan with something to keep him busy for a couple of hours and we retired for what I can only describe as an afternoon siesta. And it. Was. Glorious. I write about the importance and benefits of napping on frequent occasions but I would be lying if I said that I get to do it, every weekend. But we indulged in about two hours of napping and I awoke at about 4:20 (insert weed jokes, here). We enjoyed a cold supper of ready-made chicken, cheese and dip. It was a wonderful day of doing next to nothing.

We all need a day like that, once in a while. I can admit that I stepped out briefly to grab milk, bread and some necessities for the week but I did nothing besides that. I originally had plans to knock out 40 or 50 kilometres on the bike but I’m not into peddling in high summer temperatures. The end result is that we got a day’s rest and got to be lazy, which is perfectly okay. Everyone needs to do that, sometimes. It was wonderful and I think I needed that. Between the heat and the fact that I once again go for eye injections tomorrow, it was a nice change of pace. Once in a while, you just gotta have a lazy day… ☯️

All Kneel Before The Mighty Caffeine…

Considering I haven’t properly gotten a decent dose of caffeine into my system yet, I may seem a little testy while writing this post. Sometimes I wonder how different life would be, had I not tried caffeine for the first time, way back when. I guess it wouldn’t have made much of a difference since I likely would have gotten around to it eventually. Caffeine is one of those staples of normal, adult life. But as with all things in life, there is some good and bad to caffeine. And we’re going to discuss some of it, here.

How does caffeine work and why do we use it to wake up in the mornings? In simple terms, caffeine works by stimulating certain parts of the brain that tell you you’re tired, as well as stimulating the central nervous system and blood pressure. people who consume heavy amounts of caffeine may need greater and greater amounts of caffeine to experience the same effects, It doesn’t ACTUALLY wake you up or make you less tired; it simply blocks the neuro-receptors telling you that you are.

Considering some of the effects of caffeine, namely the effects on the heart and blood pressure, it’s important to remember that these things can have an effect on blood sugars and Diabetes control, as well. And considering that caffeine can dehydrate you and acts as a diuretic, all of these factors need to be considered if you’re trying to maintain good Diabetic control.

So, how much caffeine is too much caffeine? This is an important question, despite the fact that many people tend to ignore it. If you visit Health Canada’s website (sorry, I don’t have the link for it), they recommend that a healthy person should limit their caffeine intake to no more than 400 mg of caffeine per day. The key aspect here is “healthy adult.” It could be less than that number for people who already have heart issues, blood pressure issues or may be pregnant.

All of this is also extremely suggestive, since different people will have different sensitivities to caffeine and how quickly they might metabolize it. And let’s consider that 400 milligrams of caffeine is what’s found in about three 8-ounce cups of regular coffee. I know some people who get through an entire pot of coffee every morning. When you get into the realm of energy drinks, such as I do, one usual, 473 mL can of energy drink will have about 160 mg of caffeine. This means that having two cans in one day has you touching the ceiling of your daily limit.

However, when one factors in the Taurine, Ginseng and Guarana included in the drink, which all act as stimulants, it makes an energy drink significantly stronger than your average cup of coffee. And since it’s summer time, one must also remember that an energy drink won’t slake your thirst if out in the sun. In fact, it may very well dehydrate you further.

At the end of the day, caffeine consumption is not a bad thing as long as one is able to enjoy it in moderation and bear some of these concerns in mind. Energy drinks aren’t any worse than drinking coffee. Just keep an eye on your caffeine levels and overall consumption. And for the love of the light, if you don’t drink energy drinks but you see someone who is, there’s no need to comment on it! Keep that shit to yourself! I think I need that coffee, now. Excuse me…☯️

Better Days Are Not So Far Away…

Despite our efforts to avoid them, we all have bad days. Typically and for the most part, we suffer through them, deal with them and let them pass after a good night’s sleep. Remember I said that; it will apply later on in the post. But most people will actively do whatever they can to avoid bad days, despite the fact that they’re essentially unavoidable and a part of life.

Last week, I experience one of the worst “bad days” that I can recall in quite some time. What exactly happened to make it a bad day is not important (and I don’t need to come off like a snowflake for my woes) so much as how I dealt with it. Given everything I’ve been through in my life, I’ve prided myself on being able to maintain healthy tools to manage my emotions, more specifically anger. Please note that I said “manage” my anger and not control or suppress it.

Suppressing or bottling up one’s anger is a little like shaking a bottle of carbonated soda (something Nathan loves to do). Although the bottle will hold the soda, pressure will continue to build and gather until eventually the cap will pop and that pressure will explode outward, saturating everyone and everything near it. Anger is very much the same; if you don’t have a healthy outlet for it, it will eventually build up enough pressure to eventually burst and affect one’s entire environment.

Unless someone is close enough to me to have been told this fact, people believe I maintain my calm because I study the Buddha Dharma when in reality, I study to Buddha Dharma to help calm me. The difference is important because like any other living person, I feel and experience the entire spectrum of emotions and they affect me very much in the same way as anyone else. But it’s how I choose to deal with these negative emotions that’s important.

Just to be clear, anger, sadness and any other emotion labeled as “negative” still has a purpose, even if we dislike them and don’t assume so. Much like feeling fear let’s us known that we are potentially in danger, anger and disappointment tell us something about ourselves and the situation we’re facing that we may not have been aware of, otherwise. It doesn’t mean it isn’t normal to dislike being on those situations or that something shouldn’t be done about them. Cue the advice…

Meditation can be a fantastic way to help alleviate the effects of negative emotions. By entering oneself and allowing oneself to calm, breathe and focus on the lighter things, anger will often seem to lose its strength. This may not always be the case and may not work for everybody. But it’s definitely a good starting point. Finding the time and space to do this can be challenging, but never impossible.

Physical fitness is also an important aspect. Pushing yourself through a rigorous workout that can include martial arts or just hitting a good ol’ fashion punching bag can go a long way towards cooling the intense heat that your anger may have created within your soul. Even something that isn’t intense, like taking a walk, getting some fresh air and being alone with your own thoughts can be quite effective.

Sometimes there just isn’t anything that can be done and you have to just ride it out. This can be tough, especially if you’re already angry and you have to be in the same environment as loved ones and that anger become clear and obvious to them. An important step is not to bottle it up and isolate yourself. Letting those loved ones know WHY you’re angry is not only important towards making sure they know it isn’t directed at them but also pursues potential means of help as they could say or do something to provide relief from that anger.

Ultimately, sometimes all one can do is call it a day, hit the sack and get a solid night’s sleep in order to recharge one’s batteries and let one’s soul reset. This is what I did. Once I recognize I simply had no life left in me to deal with the day, I kissed my wife goodnight and let my head hit the pillow. In keeping with the mood I was in, a strong thunderstorm raged through most of the night. The next day was a new day with new challenges so I was grateful for having gotten the extra rest. Anger is a normal part of life. The idea isn’t to avoid it and the important thing is how you DEAL with it; and deal with it, you must. ☯️

What Binds Us…

Opening yourself up to others can be one of the most difficult things one can do. Especially in modern times, when people tend to try and get to know each other through virtual means before even meeting in person. When I was growing up, making a connection with someone meant actually meeting them face-to-face, introducing yourself and talking to them. Friends, associates and intimate relationships were forged this way.

These days, people meet dates online, join chat rooms and see each other for the first time through the digital frontier. Where spotting someone from across the room in a coffee shop and smiling at them would have been a first steps twenty years ago is basically considered creepy today, despite the fact that you genuinely never know who you’re meeting online until you see them in person, often with disappointment. In fact, there are entire shows about that very thing that you can watch.

Why am I bringing this up? Well, because as living creatures, there’s an energy that binds us all. That energy is called “connection,” and it’s something one can only truly accomplish by being physically present in the moment with another person. As one could no doubt agree, the problem with the online world is that you can be “connected” with thousands of people but still feel completely isolated and alone.

“Connection is the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”

– Brene Brown

Being connection with someone else is more than physically being somewhere with them. There also has to be a trust, a comfort level, an ability to know that no matter what you say or do, that person won’t walk away from you or judge you. This isn’t an easy thing, especially in light of the modern world’s propensity to be overly sensitive and offended by everything. But a good baseline to know if you’ve made a solid connection with someone is to ask yourself if you would be comfortable doing something in front of them that you would usually only do alone. If the answer is yes, you can have confidence that some trust has been developed; at least to a certain degree.

Connections are important. Humans were never meant to be solitary, isolationist creatures. Even those who often claim they prefer to be alone still need others to one extent or another. And while that need is very real, making connections and building trust are integral parts of ensuring one’s wellbeing and health. Food for thought…☯️

“Roger” That…

Hey, I totally get it… It’s 2022 and everyone is tethered to their electronic conveniences on some way, shape or form… I’m no exception; I have my smart phone on me almost at all times and certainly never leave home without it. And there’s no denying that the advancement of technology has made Diabetes control far superior to what it was in 1982 when I was first diagnosed. But, do we take it too far? Are we too dependent? It all depends on who you ask…

As a father, I think the use of electronics has run rampant in society and it’s infiltrated my household. Getting my 7-year old through a full day without touching his device or his Nintendo Switch is a miracle akin to parting the Red Sea. Some of that is my bad, having introduced him to the colourful, moving pictures of an iPad when he was just an infant. And why not? It’s the way of the world, right? Unlike how it was when I was a kid, playing outside and occupying my mind solely on the strength of one’s imagination… Maybe I would have had more friends if I had been limited to social media as a kid. But I digress…

Having one’s nose buried in electronics has SO become the way of the world, it’s almost no longer considered a social taboo to have your smart device in front of your face when at a table with others. I’m reminded of a conference I recently attended, where the people at the table (there were about 8 of us) introduced ourselves and chatted for all of about a full minute. As I was looking around the room, I didn’t realize it right away but everyone at my table had retreated to their respective screens. It almost made me feel bad for leaving my phone in my pocket. Almost.

Canada recently suffered a telecommunications services disruption that rocked everyone’s respective world. If it weren’t for the inconvenience of no debit card use, I would have been mildly entertained by the state of people’s panic. I also would have been oblivious. It last a day, two at most, with all debit systems in the country inoperable for the time in question. Some areas were affected differently. For example, my mother claims that New Brunswick had no actual internet coverage during this time, which I think is hilarious since she doesn’t use the internet or even own a computer.

The effects were illuminating, from a societal standpoint. It was amazing to see how people were panicking and unable to function without the almighty invisible signal that governs their lives. I totally see the irony in the fact that I’m making light of this while drafting this post on a wireless device and if I were more committed to my imposed childhood school of faith, I might make comment about how people are hellbent on craving the comfort of an invisible force they can’t see, touch or feel but can’t live without. I think there was a book written about that once… Oh, the irony!

Don’t get me wrong; if I suddenly had absolutely no internet available to me, indefinitely, I’d likely piss and moan on a cosmic scale. What I get a kick out of is how society has become so utterly dependent on the need for our technology that we’re slowly forgetting what remains of our humanity. can’t watch your streaming service? Read a book, take a walk, sit outside in the sun. Play with your kids (considering they’re suffering the loss as well). I love me my games and daily challenges but there’s more to life than the digital frontier. Maybe it’s time some of us started remembering that. Food for thought… ☯️

Strike Your Own Fuse…

Motivation is a funny thing and I often categorize some of my posts (this one included) as a “motivation” post, but that’s usually because I hope that it’ll motivate you. But the thing is, motivation means different things to different people, depending on their perspective, how they train and what values they attach to such things as motivation.

Some people believe that you need to be motivated to start doing something good for yourself. Okay, let’s examine that concept… Normally, motivation is defined as a general desire or willingness to do something. But how can you desire doing something if you’ve never experienced it before? In order to take that first step towards better health, better fitness and overall goals, I would argue that you need WILL. So long as you have the will to take those first steps and push yourself towards a goal, progress and success will motivate you to continue on.

That feeling of motivation comes almost as a reward for pushing through the difficult, initial steps of any goal you set for yourself. Some may argue that you need to be motivated to start. I respectfully decline. You need to have the WILL to start. Motivation comes later. And once that motivation comes, it’s important to recognize that it should be geared towards a positive outcome. If your motivations are for the defeat of others, you’ll never succeed. If your motivations are geared towards status, image or ego, you’ve failed before you started.

Have the strength of will to make a start. It may suck, it’ll likely hurt and may be difficult to accomplish. But if you can rise up and push yourself enough to take those first steps, progress will motivate you and push you further. Chicken or the egg; you can’t have one without the other. Food for thought… ☯️