Category: Motivation

No One Style Can Rule Them All…

One of the biggest pet peeves I have with the martial arts is the in-fighting among styles. Generally speaking and realistically, everyone always assumes that their style is the best, often choosing to point out what they see wrong with a neighbouring style as opposed to possibly absorbing the aspects that may not only be right, but many also be an addition to their overall tool belt. Some of this is simply loyalty, which on its face, is not a bad thing. But when you belittle or denigrate other styles, you water us all down. And that is not a good thing.

First and foremost, a little background on my own training is very important. My main style is Uechi Ryu Okinawan karate. The reason I say main style, is because I studied various martial arts in my youth and many styles of each, in order to land on Uechi Ryu. And I’ve written about this in previous posts; finding a dojo and style that fits for you is a very subjective journey and begins and ends with you. Too often, I’ve seen students convince their friends to come train, only to have the friend phone it in because they really don’t enjoy it. So an important first aspect is, if you don’t like it, don’t stick around. You’re not just wasting your time, you’re wasting the time of the Sensei and instructors that could be assisting the other students. But I digress…

It’s important to be committed to one style. Sensei used to tell me, “one religion, one love, one style.” And the reason behind this is pretty simple. You can’t master one thing while simultaneously studying four others. Only through focus, commitment and dedication can you grow and progress within your training and move towards whatever goals you may have set for yourself. But while you’re busy carrying your tool box around, keep in mind that you should always leave room for some new tools. As the old saying goes, it’s difficult to fill a cup that is already overflowing.

In recent years, I’ve had the opportunity to train in a few different karate dojos. And something that has continued to amaze me is the difference in technique and methods, even for simple things that should be straightforward. Let’s take a front kick as an example. A front kick is a front kick, right? One would be inclined to think so. In my style, you begin by bring the knee up to make a 90-degree bend in the leg, followed by pushing out and striking with the big toe. The results is a deep, penetrating kick that can devastate the spleen and soft tissues. In a style I recently trained with, their front kick fires straight out from the standing position and the strike is performed with the ball of the foot.

So, which method is better? That’s the important question. So what should one do? Critique the other style for doing it wrong? Or open one’s mind to accept that perhaps there’s a different way? Personally, I’ve always been taught that chambering your kick prior to executing is important as it allows you the flexibility of changing the kick prior to execution. For example, I can flow from a front kick and alter to a roundhouse kick with little difficulty. But the other method could arguably save valuable seconds in its execution. And there’s no denying you have less chance of breaking your toes by using the ball of the foot as opposed to the big toe.

It’s important to remember that martial arts is a lot like falling flakes of snow. In nature, no two snowflakes are alike. Each one is different and unique. This is because as they fall each flake is subjected to wind current and moisture in the air that causes their crystals to form in a unique manner that’s never replicated twice. But ultimately, it’s all snow. The same can be said for martial arts. As it progresses and grows, each style develops in its own unique way, with its own techniques, methods and perspectives. But ultimately, it’s all martial arts.

So while you should stay committed to one style as your core, take the happy medium approach. Allow yourself the opportunity to be open-minded and learn something new. See the possibilities in the styles you visit as opposed to resisting the aspects you don’t agree with. The result will be a better equipped tool box in your overall self-defence repertoire. At some point, this inevitably becomes the only way to continue to grow. Food for thought… ☯️

Keep Your Finger Off The Trigger…

Ah, triggers! For almost fifteen years, I kept the title of today’s post at the forefront of my mind, as a mantra, during my law enforcement career. Obviously in this context, a trigger is referring to a small device that releases a spring of some sort to set off a mechanical function, like pulling the trigger for a gun. But the actual meaning of a trigger for the purposes of today’s post, is something that may spark negative thoughts or emotions and cause the a nice cornucopia of reactions from the person who is “triggered,” including anger, anxiety, fear or sadness.

The thing about triggers is that everyone has them. In recent years, there’s been significant headway made in relation to people’s mental health and how to address it. Part of that is having individuals identify and recognize their triggers and to know how to deal with them. While that can be significantly important in terms of one’s personal health and growth, there are very important detail that comes to mind that many not be popular with folks but I promise it isn’t intended to offend; it’s simply a truth: your triggers are not my problem.

So, what do I mean with that last statement? Simply put and as I mentioned earlier, everyone has triggers. However, and as time has gone by, people seem to be inclined to believe that you should know what their triggers may be and to avoid them. This is categorically false and is a logical impossibility. For example, if we’re sitting at the office in the middle of a meeting, how am supposed to know that you’re allergic to the sound of paper (that’s a real thing, you can Google it)?

My point is that if you tell me about this particular quirk of yours and I decide to be an asshole and do something that triggers you in spite of what you’ve revealed, shame on me. If you get triggered by something I say or do and you lose your absolute shit on me despite the fact I didn’t know, shame on you! No one person can be expected to know what may offend or trigger you. It is, in fact, your responsibility to take a moment to tell someone, “Sorry, but I’m not comfortable with that.” Otherwise, it’s kind of hard to hold the offending party to task for it.

While it could be easily understood that some people may actually not be comfortable with revealing their triggers in all circumstances, that doesn’t resolve the issue you may face if someone triggers you without being aware of it. That person should be held responsible for your reaction, especially if you never revealed the issue to them. It comes back to the old saying, “I can only control my words; not how you react to them.” By that same token, I can only control my ability not to offend or trigger you based on what you choose to share with me. It all comes down to you. Food for thought… ☯️

Movember 2024

Hello, dear readers. I’ve never been much of one to ask others for anything and certainly, my blog has never been intended as a means of making or raising money. In fact, I often find it mildly amusing when I’ve seen blog writers not only have PayPal links on their pages to fund their blog but some who try to do it as a living and actively ask readers for funding. I mean, if it works for them, good for them, I guess. It’s just not something I’ve ever been able to get on board with. But I digress…

My point is, once a year I set aside my reluctance to put a hand out and I raise funds for one of the moist important charity initiatives (to me): Movember.

For those who are unfamiliar, Movember is a registered charity in canada that holds an annual challenge as a way to raise funds and awareness for prostate and testicular cancer, which is diagnosed in more than 1.4 million men globally, each year. Myself and several of my work colleagues have participated for the past few years and have raised tons of money to help support those afflicted with the conditions and to fund cancer research. While we always set a modest goal of only $500 for the year, a little help can go a long way and your donations would do just that.

I know times are tight, everyone has bills and financial obligations and everything seems to be constantly getting more and more expensive. But I can’t stress enough how even the smallest bit adds to the overall pile and can help.

Donating has never been simpler. You can donate directly online by visiting the Movember website and clicking on the black “Donate” button at the top. Select “Find a person or team” and just type in “Shawn Cook” and you should see my ugly mug pop up. Fill out the donation form and you’ve done your part. You can even get a tax receipt, if wanted.

I don’t wander social media much at all these days but hopefully I have a few people on my friends list that will step up and provide a donation. Every little bit helps. Here the webpage: Movember Canada. No pressure and no expectation here, folks. But if anyone wants to contribute and make a donation, please know that it will be sincerely appreciated. ☯️

Stop And Smell The Roses…

I’ve always kind of been the type to push himself a lot, especially when it comes to my work. For the most part, I never stop, unless I get sick and even then, I end up powering through if my illness takes a bit more time than I’d like. This instinct has served many of my previous employers well through the years. Even though most employers make a nice show of telling staff not to come into work when they’re sick or to make sure they take their vacation time, it’s very seldom a happy thing when staff are absent from their post for any length of time. It can make for a scenario where even people who aren’t as much of a “go getter” as me question whether they should actually take time off or not. But in the interest of one’s health, let me tell you… You absolutely should.

First and foremost, let me slap you in the face with a small dose of reality. Speaking only for myself but generally speaking, I’m out of the house for work purposes at least 10 hours a day. By the time I leave the home and get to the office, put in my 8-hour day and make my way home, that’s my 10 hours. We have a pretty structured daily routine that involves eating supper and cleaning up, which averages about two hours. Okay. Then, depending on what day of the week it is, we follow a showering/bathing schedule for the boys, I help with laundry and cleaning and whatever other chore may be required that day, which usually leaves an hour, if I’m lucky, to just sit and veg out in front of the television with my wife. Conceptually, we could be using that hour for something productive, like exercising, taking our boys outside or sitting at the table with a drink and good conversation. But by this point, we’re usually both so burned out from the day that we’re in bed shortly by 9 pm (if not before) to grab what hopefully ends up being 8 hours of sleep. Only to do it all over again the next day.

I’ve often heard it said that one must work to live, not live to work. While it would be far better not to have to work to live either, one must also admit that there must be some outlying purpose to life besides sitting at home, so work can be okay. But the important thing is to make some time for yourself and keep that time for either personal self-development, training, relaxing or just straight up doing something for oneself. The important aspect to bear in mind is that there’s a huge difference between being “off work” and actually relaxing. You can be at home doing nothing but still not relaxing. While sitting in front of the television binge-watching your favourite show can be relaxing on occasion, when it becomes the habit and part of the only hour to have free to the entire day, you may be stuck in a repeating loop that you’ll be unable to work your way out of.

What I mean by this, is that it’s important to change up what you do with your down time so that you don’t become stagnant. I’ve had a rough go in recent months, between my use of Ozempic, weight loss and lessened energy levels, I’ve moved away from my usual fitness regime and favoured resting up on the couch with my evenings so that I don’t turn into a bag of absolute smashed ass at the office the following day. The problem is that doing the former does not prevent the latter.

Through my studies, I’ve often held the belief that all life is created from energy. So a simple equation to life can look a little something like this. Everything alive moves. Movement creates energy. Energy sustains life. Life creates movement. It’s a simplistic view of how we maintain ourselves but the reality is that as soon as you eliminate any one of those three, the other two will falter.

If you stop moving, you won’t maintain your energy and you’ll die much sooner. This is why it’s so important that one makes the time to keep some movement going in one’s life. While one may feel it’s better (and usually easier) to just rest up with the precious little time one has in their day, taking time for some self-care and actually entertaining distraction can be important.

Last week and completely out of the blue, I decided to take the week off. At least the first half. Thursday and Friday I had my eye injections, but more on that in another post. I’m one of those people who carry over more vacation time than he takes, so I figured I should end that cycle and take some time off. No plans, no destination; just pure, unadulterated time off. And I’m happy to say that I did absolutely nothing.

Most people would assume that vacation time means you need to travel, visit family or do something specific. But there’s something to be said for just staying at home, kicking back and maybe doing a few things in the house you’ve been putting off. Despite travelling to Saskatoon for my eyes on Thursday, it was a good week of sleeping in and relaxing. And sometimes you need that. ☯️

Alive And Well, And Still Hitting The Keyboard…

Hard to believe the number of years that have gone by since I started this blog. Originally, it was a means to an end; intended to help me maintain my writing skills while continuing to build my writing acumen and researching various topics that interested me. Unlike most bloggers, I started this through the lens that I was doing it for myself. It didn’t matter how many followers I had or how much or how little I wrote. As long as it held my interest and I wanted to continue , I was accomplishing the goal.

Originally, my intention had been to write primarily about karate and Type-1 Diabetes. After all, these were the topics that I was deeply versed in. Over time, I started to include topics related to Buddhism, health & fitness and nutrition. All of these things tied together in some form or another, lending credence to their inclusion. And of course, there’s no denying that I frequently make a point of writing my opinion on a variety of topics, whether they relate to my primary subjects or not.

Over time, I started making small goals for myself, challenges, if you will. I started by challenging myself to write about something on a daily basis. This may sound easy in concept but it definitely wasn’t. trying to figure out something to post daily was often very challenging, resulting in my seeking opinions from others as to what they would like to see posted and even topics they’d like to see me cover. In a way, it got me to come out of my little shell and consult with others, as well.

As I got into the groove to post daily, I started to challenge myself with numbers. Let’s try posting for 100 days in a row without missing a single day. Done. Let’s try a full year. Done. Let’s even try posting for 1,000 straight days in a row without missing a day. Abso-fuckin-lutely done! After that, I decided to take a step back and focus on other projects, train at some other dojos and work on myself a bit. I also have a day job that, you know, I should probably not ignore. So I took a break for a while.

As the months have droned on, I’ve slowly started to return to this blog, writing more frequently than I have in the past year. It’s not that I really have more free time to do so or more opportunities but I have come to recognize that I still enjoy it. And when you find something you enjoy, it’s kind of hard not making the time for it. What’s been nice is I seem to have a slight increase in followers in recent months. I’m no online influencer or anything but even if all of these folks only read the occasional post here and there, it’s nice knowing that someone is seeing my words and possibly gleaning something from them. I’ve even received a few reader comments recently, which is always nice to see.

It’s been nice to get back to something that’s essentially become familiar and comfortable. While I don’t think I’ll ever go back to writing a post on a daily basis, it still nice to see increased followers and some engaging by some of them. It shows me that while I’ve been doing this for myself and I enjoy it regardless of the outcome, there are still some folks who are getting something from it, as well. ☯️

Deadpool & Wolverine: A Review (Spoilers Ahead)

One iPod ,my biggest pet peeves with modern society is the propensity everyone seems to have developed for analyzing and critiquing every little detail of every movie and show they watch. While I can say with firm honesty that I have a tendency of comparing any martial arts or policing approaches on the screen to my own experience, I believe that people should just sit down, shut up and enjoy the ride. After all, tv and movies are intended to entertain. While sometimes rooted in reality, this doesn’t mean it will always be an accurate depiction. But I digress…

I got lucky this weekend and wound up with four days off. The stars don’t often align that way and so many days off in a row that I haven’t had to request usually means that my family plans some sort of trip or activity. This time around, we went nowhere and did nothing. Except experience a drainage backup in our basement but that’s a story for another post. No, this time my wife and I chose to keep the weekend reasonably simple and stayed home. We did, however, treat ourselves to a little somethin’ somethin’… We went out to see the new Deadpool & Wolverine movie.

We obviously weren’t going to take our boys to see an R-rated movie but that worked out just fine, because it allowed my wife and I to have a much-deserved date to the movies together. We secured a babysitter and spent the weekend watching the first two Deadpool movies and “Logan” in anticipation. I was a bit surprised at the short play time for the movie, sitting at 2 hours and 7 minutes. Movies in recent years have spent so much time pushing that 3-hour threshold that it was a bit refreshing to watch a superhero movie that was only two hours.

Now, here’s where a few spoilers will start rearing their ugly heads… I don’t plan on summarizing the entire movie, mind you. But of you haven’t seen this movie yet, you may want to consider stopping here. The movie opens with Deadpool digging up the Wolverine’s grave. Some of the comedy comes off as a bit over the top but the movie in its entirety definitely evens it out. Personally, I’m a bit burnt out on the whole “multiverse” concept in shows and movies. Seems like that’s the direction everyone wants to take and it gives them Carter Blanche to use characters and storylines that would otherwise be unavailable to them. But this movie did a pretty good job of it.

Besides a side-splitting montage of Deadpool wandering the multiverse looking for a Wolverine replacement, we get to see the return of several Marvel characters that took place prior to the MCU. This includes the likes of Blade (Wesley Snipes), Elektra (Jennifer Garner) and Wolverine’s daughter, X-23 (Daphne Keene). We even got to see Chris Evan’s reprise his role as the Human Torch and a host of returning mutants portrayed by their original actors from the original X-men movie from 2000. It’s a wild ride of action and fight sequences, plot twists and lots of laughs. It was definitely worth the outing and I think my wife enjoyed it, as well.

There seems to be an unspoken challenge out there for any new movie to outdo others that come out before them. but this one definitely didn’t disappoint. The movie struck the perfect balance of funny, action-packed and nostalgic, all while keeping it short enough that the audience didn’t get bored or exasperated. The only point I would score as a negative is that when Deadpool & Wolverine are eating at the end, they should have been having chimichangas instead of shawarmas. But that’s just me. ☯️

The Forgotten Luxuries…

Despite some of the hardships of life, I have to admit that I’ve had the benefit of growing up in a pretty fantastic time in history. While not the case in other parts of the world, I enjoy the benefits of healthcare (in whatever stage it exists now), proper nutrition and access to food whenever I want it and safe, warm shelter from the elements in the form of my home. I sincerely appreciate all of these things and couldn’t see myself living without them but despite that appreciation, it can often be quite easy to take these as a staged for granted; or completely forget that they’re advantages. Enter: last weekend…

Friday nights are usually earmarked for an evening with my oldest son, Nathan. We started this tradition almost by accident a few years ago, and it involves grabbing snacks and enjoying a binge-fest of old school Nintendo games in the basement, followed by “camping out,” which usually involves Nathan crashing on the floor and I sleep on the guest bed we have in the basement. I’ve gotten too old to sleep on a blanket on the basement floor. But I digress. Just roughly after supper was made, the power went out. It’s a little hard to hang out in a basement with no power. Not to mention that the gaming system wouldn’t work, anyway.

Luckily, we live in a world where lack of electrical power doesn’t necessarily cut you off from the outside world. A quick search of our energy provider’s website revealed a downed line in a central area as the cause for the power outage. The question now was, what to do with our time. Nathan and I ran out to buy our evening snacks, committed to getting on with our evening once the power returned. The power outage had a significant radius and we had to drive for quite a while before reaching a part of the city that had power. Given that most locations operate based on debit machine and/or use electronic cash systems, we couldn’t shop anywhere nearby where we reside.

Once we got home, the power was still out. Considering we’re slowly creeping our way into the summer months, days are longer and it remains light out for longer periods. For my wife and I, no power isn’t a huge issue. She was able to read by daylight and i was able to muck around on social media and YouTube, considering my phone had a reasonable charge to it. But have you ever tried to convince a 4 and 9 year old to entertain themselves without screens and devices? This is unfortunately the world they live in, and convincing them to play games or use toys was surprisingly hard. I ended up putting on a movie on a portable DVD player to keep them engaged.

Throughout the course of the next couple of hours, we contemplated how we would address meals for the following day if power wasn’t restored. Considering the reported extent of the damage, we could have found ourselves without power throughout the night. Luckily, power came back on just shortly prior o 9 pm and I was able to get a couple of things done and have a bit of time with my son for our Friday night. But it certainly opened my eyes and had me recognize the fact that something I take for granted on a daily basis is a definite luxury and getting through our daily routine is significantly compromised without it.

My wife and I have been binge-watching Dr. Quinn in recent months (don’t judge us!) and I’ve often thought how peaceful and easier life must have been, back then. But after seeing how our house basically came to a standstill just because we didn’t have power (while it was still light out, no less), I’m a bit more inclined to appreciate the creature comforts that modern life offers. We don’t realize just how much we use it, until we don’t have access to it. Food for thought… 😘

On The Lighter Side…

It’s no secret that technology is quickly outrunning the generation trying to use it. More and more, it seems that every device or gadget has features and functions on it that I either completely ignore or can’t understand. I recently spoke to someone who was using a landline and she explained that she’s never had a cell phone and never plans to. I kind of miss those days. Don’t get me wrong, I love my smart phone and I wouldn’t see myself going without it. As a family man with responsibilities, it’s a great tool for managing my daily tasks.

One area where technology keeps moving ahead is with personal vehicles. I remember that my first car was an early 80’s Toyota hatchback, 3-speed transmission with only one side mirror and it didn’t even have a tape deck! Radio only. I absolutely loved that car but it had no power steering; you turned the vehicle on muscle power. It had halogen headlights that were yellowed and barely lit the road. It was the pinnacle of 1980’s imported vehicles, but compared to today, it was a piece of metal burning gas.

Last summer, and I probably wrote about this already, I purchased a 2021 Toyota hatchback as our household’s second vehicle. It was like coming full circle for me, since a Toyota hatchback had been my first vehicle. There’s still no tape deck. In fact, there’s no deck at all; music is played through Bluetooth on my phone. Amazingly, the vehicle has sensors that warns me if a vehicle is coming up alongside me and slowly steers me back if I start veering across median lines on the road. It’s pretty neat, albeit a bit concerning that my vehicle would have this sort of control while I’m driving.

Despite all the functions, my archaic ass has adjusted other them quite well and I enjoy driving the car. I never realized just how many features were involved until the road trip I was on, last week. Typically when I travel to Saskatoon for my eye injections or something, we’re looking at about two and half to three hours’ of travel time (I sometimes do it in less but I have friends who are still cops, so imma keep that shit to myself). I usually make a point of stopping once during that transit, either for coffee or to accommodate my Diabetic bladder.

On this particular trip, I was travelling from a city much farther north than I’m used to. As I was travelling alone and had skipped breakfast, I had no need of a washroom and I had filled my gas tank along the way. At roughly the 3-hour mark of traveling without stopping, I start hearing a beeping sound. It was unfamiliar but I assumed it was something on my insulin pump. Like a stubborn goon, I didn’t want to stop just to press a button so I tried to shimmy the pump out of my pocket (I was wearing jeans) without stopping or removing my seatbelt. Not my brightest moment but I managed it. In checking my pump, everything was clear and the alert wasn’t coming from the pump. I turned off the music right at the moment the chime went off again and realized that it was coming from the dash of the vehicle…

Apparently, I had been driving just long enough without stopping that my car decided to check up on me. I had never seen this happen before. I got a chuckle out of it, so I grabbed a quick snapshot. I guess in a world where “smart cars” are a thing, I should be overly surprised. But it’s nice to know that my car will give me a reminder if I’m behind the wheel too long. ☯️

A Modern Touch Of Nostalgia…

I had a bit of a unique experience on Monday night. The evening was carrying on as it often does in our household. My wife was working her remote job diligently in her home office, my oldest son was hiding away in his room like the preteen he’s becoming, and the toddler and i were relaxing downstairs, watching cartoons and doing laundry. Around 7 p.m., we got a doorbell ring. For the most part, our neighbourhood is pretty quiet and we rarely have someone come to our, with the notable exception of food delivery or the few door-to-door salespeople we get in the summer.

In answering the door, two young boys were standing there. Perhaps 12 or 13 years old, they were exactly what you would expect of boots their age. A bit disheveled but not necessarily dirty, hair all over the place and a kind of contained, quiet energy that they would access to at any moment. They asked me if I would like them to rake my front yard. I know a lot of people who would have simply said go ahead but this is 2024… I asked them how much they charge. They asked me what I thought was fair, so I told them if they would completely rake the front yard and bag the leaves, I would give them $20 each. I would even provide the bags. They agreed and went to the front yard to wait.

They had an interesting combination of eagerness and wariness and when I brought the rakes and bags to them, they actually asked me if I planned to rip them off. I asked them what they meant and they indicated that they’ve had a few households refuse to pay them afterwards. I flourished two crisp 20-dollar bills and explained that they knew where I lived and knew I was in the house. Refusal to pay would warrant them getting their parents involved and MAKING me pay, which seemed to satisfy them. The fact that some folks reneged on payment bothered me more than the fact they asked the question. I also explained that so long as they raked the yard properly and collected all the leaves, they would get paid. They soon got to work.

I did warn them that they only had about an hour of daylight left before it would start getting dark and it would be difficult to spot any missed leaves. My two sons were fascinated and were watching out the window. It was a good learning lesson for them as, at their age, I would have been the one doing the raking. My father wouldn’t have paid someone else to do it. I explained all of this to them. My toddler was totally on board with raking. My oldest kind of shrugged and retreated to the sanctuary of his room.

Shortly, the doorbell rang again and the boys said they were done. I stepped outside to “inspect” their work and I have to admit, the front yard looked pretty sweet. I fulfilled my part of the deal and paid them each their $20. I got to talking to them a bit and asked if they’d had the opportunity to do many yards in the neighbourhood. They replied that they hadn’t as many residents either didn’t want them doing it or planned on doing it themselves. They were trying to make and save up some money so they could pay for things throughout the summer.; something I rarely see in today’s youth, including my own children.

What was nice about this occurrence and why I felt it important to write about it is, I fancy myself as someone who doesn’t paint everyone with the same brush. It’s easy to consider modern youth to be tethered to their devices, vane and entitled and typically lazy. I’ll go out on a limb and admit that I’ve met many who are like this. The important lesson and the little ray of hope for the future, is that there are still those select few who will work for what they want or need and aren’t afraid to put themselves out there instead of hiding behind a screen. It reminded me a bit of myself when I was a kid. ☯️

Always Something Else…

Life is all about finding balance and recognize the positive, despite the occasional shit storms of negative. This isn’t always an easy thing and some folks don’t do so well with focusing on the positive. I can freely admit that I’ve been guilty of this, myself. Often feeling depressed or despondent at the aspects of life I don’t have, as opposed to appreciating and liking the things I do have. I think we would all agree that there are integral aspects of life that will always be more important than everything else. These include family, health and a safe living environment. But the daily rigors of life sure can make those aspects hard to appreciate, sometimes…

I know for a fact that I’m not the only who’s been there. The work day is done and I slowly trudge my way to my car. Tired, head pounding and perhaps even a touch on the sweaty side, despite sitting in an office all day, I eagerly yearn for a period of quiet serenity in the safety of my home. Unfortunately, life rarely cares about one’s plan, which is a doctrine I use in daily life. My trip home is anything but serene as every fucker and their dog conveniently decides to choose THAT moment to head home as well, burying me in a flood of traffic, rude and incompetent drivers and turning what should be a 10-minute drive into nearly half an hour. Certain needs at home prompt a stop at the local market, where I contend with slow walkers, gawkers who seem to think they need to block every aisle as they blankly stare at one product for minutes on end and staff who believe it’s okay to sweep at my feet as I shop. Even the self-checkout, which I assume will give me respite from interacting with others, causes me issues as there is always an item that doesn’t go through or an issue with the scale that prompts the required intervention of staff.

Getting home doesn’t provide the sanctuary I had hoped, as my children all but pounce on me as I walk in the door. Exasperated and tired with my hands full, I resent their level of energy and the fact they don’t permit me to get in the door and offload my burdens before piling on with theirs. I then find myself needing to pass on necessary information from the day to my wife, who also provides key messaging about our oldest’s school day and things that are needed around the house. All of this takes place before I have even unknotted my tie. This is followed by trying to determine a meal that all four family members will gladly eat as well as where to eat it, since my toddler has commandeered the dining table for his latest, greatest Duplo block creation and there is no room to dine effectively. My oldest retreats to his bedroom, already exhibiting teen tendencies despite only being nine years old.

Once supper is done, the burden of daily chores that don’t happen on their own begin to take place. Dishes, laundry, washing the kids and getting them prepared for bed in a timely fashion consumes the majority of the evening. once all of this is accomplished, I may have a brief hour of uninterrupted quiet to myself before my aging body tells me I need to lie down for the night or potentially face deeper exhaustion the following day. All of this is keeping in mind that some nights involve trying to hit up karate class or bringing my oldest to Scouts, which adds a further delay to the evening and potentially a later bedtime. Then, if I’m lucky, I may sleep through the night or I may face issues with my blood sugars that will have me lose several hours of much-needed rest. And the hours I do get aren’t adequate as they are few and far between and sleep isn’t cumulative; you normally have to get it al in, in one sitting. Wash, rinse and repeat…

If one were to read through that narrative, it would likely be agreed that it seems pretty bleak and negative. Sounds horrible on its face, actually. It depicts the daily life of someone with little to no time for themselves and who spends their day in a perpetual state of servitude. It’s how most people go through life and how they see things. Sure, some will usually find escape in certain activities like sporting events, evenings out with the guys or hitting the local watering hole. These things don’t offer a solution to the burdens of life but rather compound them as any of them means time away from your home and family. And the requirements of life outlined above don’t go away; they just keep piling up until they’re dealt with.

That being said, there are always two sides to the scale and for every negative, there must absolutely and inevitably be, a positive. Such is balance. So while the average person may be exasperated and fed up with their daily grind, there is a sugar-coated, frosted silver lining to their dark cloud that most people choose not to acknowledge. Read the narrative of my daily grind from above one more time. Recognize how it might seem negative on its surface but take note of the important aspects of life that it includes. Now come back and read the following paragraphs, that outline the positivity to that narrative…

I have a job. I have stable, sustainable employment. Let me say that again: I HAVE A FUCKING JOB! This is important because realistically, not everyone today has stable employment. That, or they don’t make enough money to sustain their household’s needs. I’m blessed with the fact that not only do I have a job that ensures a daily work/life balance, it provides enough financial security to allow me to provide for my family and all of our needs. And if that wasn’t enough icing on the cake, I just happen to work a job where I get to help people and this provides satisfaction that I wouldn’t get elsewhere. Although most of us would love to win the lottery and spend our days sprawled in a hammock, there’s something to be said for having this aspect in one’s life. And it leads to many of the other points in the daily routine…

Being able to stop in at the grocery store and having ready access to whatever food and dietary needs my family may have, is a gift and blessing in and of itself. Not everyone is so lucky, In fact there are more and more people in Canada going without adequate food with every passing year. Despite traffic jams and other drivers, I am financially stable enough to have a safe, reliable means of travel that I not only use to come and go from my job but to transport my family to whatever we need to do, as well. I so often see people walking or standing at the bus stop, their hands full and their backs burdened, carrying several bags of groceries because they don’t have a car to get home. Or walking to their job in the rain because they can’t financially sustain themselves to purchase a vehicle.

When one gets home, one would expect to have some peace and quiet. Although it would be lovely to be able to step in, drop my burdens and change out of my daily work attire, it’s a blessing to have people who love me greet me excitedly at the door. To know that I was missed and that others are happy to have me home is a blessing, one that needs to be appreciated and recognized as opposed to resented. Given that for years, I wasn’t even certain if Diabetes would allow me to have children, they need to be seen for the acknowledged miracle that they are. Too many people spend their lives in a state of imposed solitude. Alone and with no one to help them through the struggles of life. My wife is a damn veteran in dealing with life and walking with me through the difficulties it presents.

Last but not least is how lucky I am to have access to medicines and technology that make the managing of my Type-1 Diabetes not only possible, but sustainably easy. If I were born a century ago, I would have lived for a couple of weeks past my diagnosis before succumbing and dying to Diabetic symptoms. Hell, I was born in the 1970’s and even then, our lack of understanding and poor technology was enough to put my life in peril. Nowadays, the access to insulin and medications needed to keep me alive and healthy is nothing short of miraculous. Despite the occasional issue, I live well. My insulin pump is a piece of absolute, fucking technological marvel and I can’t imagine ever going back to life without it.

The point I’m trying to make with this long-winded post, if you’ve managed ot keep reading this far, is that life is good. Despite the fact that most people choose to see life through the first lens, it’s important to acknowledge the positivity that comes with seeing it through the second lens. Doing so will help you in recognizing that even when you’re tired and exasperated with life, you should be happy and fortunate with all of the good things you have in your life that not only make your life worth living but add significance substance to who you are as a person. A secure job, safe, comfortable home and a loving family are aspects of life to be revered and appreciated. Doing so will ensure a deeper sense of happiness and accomplishment in life. Food for thought… ☯️