Category: Motivation

Dojo Code Of Conduct


All the way back in December of 2019, I wrote a post outlining the proper guidelines a prospective student should follow when attending ANY martial arts school. Some of these are simply a matter of tradition, some of them are necessary to ensure that a dojo runs smoothly. Some, mostly all of them, are also a show of respect for the school you’ve chosen to attend. I think we can all agree that even if you’ve studied in a different style or have a different set of core beliefs, you should still show respect when inside someone else’s dojo. ESPECIALLY if your goal is to have it become your dojo, as well. Of course, if your core beliefs don’t align with the school you’re visiting, you likely shouldn’t be joining. But that’s a concept for a different post.

In recent months, I’ve returned to the dojo environment after a significant hiatus. My absence from any martial arts school was equal parts circumstance and COVID-19. But I’ve had the opportunity to observe some students, visitors and outsiders in the dojo I currently train with. Taking into consideration some of the things I’ve observed, I thought it would be ideal to once again share some of the basic principles of conduct within the dojo. This is never an exhaustive list and is often subjective to what’s been seen in the dojo but it’s all good stuff. Here we go:

  1. Bow when entering or exiting the dojo: This seems like a bit of a tiny detail, but it is an important one. It provides a show of respect; respect towards the instructors, respect towards the ones who trained before you, and respect towards the school. It also evokes a sense of discipline. Even though you may not realize it now, that tiny detail begins to lay the foundational discipline that should become the cornerstone of your training;
  2. Ensure your Gi, or karate uniform, is clean and pressed: This one is important not only for protocol and etiquette, but for hygiene reasons as well. And you would be surprised how many people overlook it. There’s nothing worse than someone who assumes that their last workout wasn’t intense enough to warrant laundering their uniform. Make sure it’s clean. Not only does that ensure a more “pleasant” environment for yourself and the other students, it shows proper respect for the uniform you wear on your journey. Keep an eye on the condition of your uniform. If it’s become yellowed and stained, regardless of washing, it’s time to replace it. If there are tears and/or holes, have them repaired (unless they’re unsightly even once fixed). You shouldn’t have to iron your gi but if you do, for the love of ALL that’s good and holy, don’t iron a crease down the center of your pants. Your going to karate class, not a business meeting;
  3. Stand straight and pay attention: When not executing a movement in the immediate moment, it is imperative that you stand straight and tall, heels together and thumbs tucked into the front of your belt. Keep your gaze towards the front and pay close attention to what the head instructor is saying. Try to avoid looking around and fidgeting. A big part of discipline is being able to focus long enough to build an attention span beyond that of a goldfish and if you fidget and spend your time, you may miss an integral piece of information you needed for what you’re working on;
  4. Acknowledge every instruction given: Different styles will have different ways of doing this. Some will choose a shallow bow when the head instructor provides instruction, some will answer in the affirmative by saying Hai (Japanese for “yes”) or something of the like… The method of acknowledgment will depend on the style and school you’re in. But once it’s clear that the instructor has completed providing instruction, this small acknowledgment is not only a sign of respect but provide the instructor with some cursory way of knowing that you’ve understood what’s been said;
  5. No food or drink within the dojo: You would think this one would be common sense, but a martial arts school is no place for you to sip your mocha-choca latte while your kid trains. Since the average martial arts class only lasts about an hour and a half to two hours, you can manage this easily without having food and drink within the confines of a training environment. In recent years, I’ve noticed that it’s become a bit more of a common thing for the practitioners to carry water bottles into the dojo and take water breaks throughout training. I’m pretty divided on this, considering Sensei always use to tell us to use the washroom and grab our drink BEFORE class started, because once you bowed in, you were in until you bowed out. But from a health perspective, I understand better than most that proper hydration is important. That being said, my current classes are only an hour in length and the average person should be able to make it through that short period without necessarily sucking back on a bottle;
  6. Get out of the way: If you become injured or over-tired, bow, step back and sit in seiza (on your knees) at the rear of the class. Stay out of the way and remove yourself from the flow of the class until your fatigue passes or your injury allows you to continue. Of course, if your injury is severe or serious enough to think you need to remove yourself, you likely shouldn’t continue as you could aggravate the injury further. The point is, there’s nothing to be served by standing in the way while others continue and you shouldn’t expect that everyone will stop and wait. After all, this is their time, too;
  7. Don’t show up late: This one is and always has been, a personal pet peeve of mine. Some instructors will say that if you show up late, it’s better to get “some of the workout” in rather than none at all. Although that is a great concept, showing up late can be disruptive to a class and shows great disrespect to your class and instructors. We all have busy lives. It falls to you to plan ahead and schedule things so that you may attend class. Whether or not showing up late is appropriate will be up to your head instructor, but true respect dictates that if you aren’t fifteen minutes early for class, you’re already late. A good example is a recent evening where I had to fight off a bout of low blood sugar and didn’t make it to class. I’m sure that if I really pushed it fought my way down there, I would have been able to make it only a short period after start of class. But such disrespect for the flow of a dojo’s operations shouldn’t be encouraged;
  8. Don’t waste your instructor’s time: Although you’ve likely paid a fee for your presence, the instructor(s) within the school are there to impart their knowledge and skills to you and others. If you aren’t going to put in your full effort, then you’re wasting your instructors time. Effectively, you’re also wasting your time AND the fee you paid. You’re also affecting the other student’s ability to learn properly. Karate isn’t something you can walk into a few 1-hour classes and expect to progress. You need to put in some supplementary time training outside the dojo, on your own. This is the only way you’ll truly progress and make any headway. Otherwise, you may as well join a knitting circle;
  9. Respect and train based on your partner: You will sometimes be paired with someone of lower or higher rank than yourself. If you’re paired with someone of lower rank, you become the example of what is to be taught. If you inflict injury upon your partner, you may discourage them from further learning and you will have gained nothing yourself. If training with someone of higher rank, respect should be given and you should take every advantage to learn from this person as they are in the same position you would be if training with a lower ranked belt. Granted, time has proven that there is just as much you can learn from a lower rank. It depends on how positive your perspective may be…

I’ve seen everything from kids running around, coffee, students fidgeting and looking around… In a school I no longer train with, there was even one guy who showed up forty minutes late for class with a bag of cheeseburgers and ate while the rest of us did calisthenics! Besides the fact that the smell of burgers was killing me, a karate dojo is definitely NOT the place to eating, much less junk food. Even though some of these points could be viewed simply as one’s person’s opinion, it stands to reason that tradition and respect are things that should never be ignored in the dojo.

Folks, no matter what sport or art you study, there will always be guidelines to follow. The martial arts simply have more, and that’s part of the charm. Although the above guidelines are only basic, they apply to any martial arts school you attend. Your specific dojo may have more, and this is one of those moments where it’s important to take the initiative and ask. After all, respect is a primary aspect of karate and all martial arts. Food for thought… ☯

It’s Never Too Late, Until It Is…

“It’s never too late…” How often have you heard that saying throughout the course of your life? It’s a well-known utterance, usually accompanying someone who is doing something said to be beyond the social or physiological limits of their current state. I’ve often read inspirational stories of people in their 70’s getting their PhD’s or parent and child graduating from the same college at the same time, together. Imagine how awkward THOSE frat parties would be? But to some, age is just a number and time seems infinite. I recently read a story about how Willie Nelson earned his fifth degree black belt at the age of 81. You can read that article here.

The big problem with this concept, and trust me when I say that I’m not TRYING to be negative, is that eventually it DOES become too late. Exceptional accomplishments much later in life are the exception, not the rule. This doesn’t make them impossible, simply improbable. And doing so is extremely subjective. Perhaps one person’s specific factors won’t allow for the same level of accomplishment as another. This is true of any point in life, not just the latter part. But eventually, the rigours and responsibilities of life start to accumulate one can find themselves at the mercy of responsibility instead of enjoying the freedom of their own potential. What’s possible becomes a fevered dream, to be dwelt upon during fleeting moments drowned in a cloud of reminiscent drunkenness.

I know that some of this likely sounds negative as hell and once again, it’s totally not meant to be. But since I’m throwing out sayings and utterances, another important one to keep in mind would be, “life is short.” And it is. None of us have any idea when life will take a turn towards that dark tunnel with the light at the end of it, so we should take full advantage. If you spend your life saying that it’s never too late, eventually, time will run out and it WILL be. Although one can always try their best to shoot for the stars, it’s important not to wait on the things that matter to you. Want to train for your black belt? Today is the day you should get started. Want to get on a diet and start losing weight? Don’t wait, get at it. Tomorrow is one more day that you haven’t done what you need to do. “It’s never too late?” Sure, until it is…

Never forget that life should be a pleasant experience. But that takes effort. Happiness should be the first and last thing on every person’s mind in a day but we cause our own suffering, and feeling a sense of loss over the “what if’s” only contribute to that suffering. Despite the pleasantness, life also wasn’t meant to be easy. And one shouldn’t mistake an easy life with happiness. One is not synonymous with the other. One can easily find happiness while still navigating the difficulties of life. What one should never do, is put off the things they want to accomplish. Because eventually, inevitably, the time will come when it WILL be too late. Food for thought… ☯️

Self-Care First…

If you’re anything like me, you work pretty hard towards taking care of others. Whether you’ve found your calling by pursuing a career that allows you to help others or you do volunteer work or perhaps simply take that extra amount of time in your daily routine to throw on a load of laundry, do extra dishes or extra cleaning around the house, helping and taking care of others is an important part of one’s life. If there’s anything that life has taught me, it’s that everybody needs somebody and helping to care for them takes many forms and is important.

That is to say, it’s ALMOST as important as taking care of yourself. Great strides have been made in the past couple of decades towards acknowledging one’s mental health as an integral part of a successful, healthy life. Of course, some have been wise enough to acknowledge that, long before it started being well-known. The important thing to remember is that you’re no good to anyone else unless you manage to take care of yourself first. I’ve previously written about the need to take time to do things for oneself, whether that means reading a book or taking a drive on your own.

Your mental health depends on it, which is why it’s so important. Throughout my life, I’ve experienced toxic relationships where I’ve been hindered or prevented from taking proper care of myself. Not only does this make life far harder than it needs to be but the toll it takes on a person is substantial. All that being said, there are three things you should never have to explain or justify. And those three things play an important role in your well-being. In fact, they represent some of the basic needs that all people have. Here they are:

The Need To Sleep

Sleep is an integral part of a person’s health. Without proper sleep, a person can expect difficulty concentrating, blood pressure issues, cardiac issues and a whole score of health-related issues that no one wants to deal with. When you feel tired or sleepy, there’s no reason you should have to explain the need to sleep. There’s nothing worse than being tired and wanting to lie down, only to have someone require an explanation or accuse you of being lazy.

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs, sleep counts as a physiological need, which is the bottom and first layer of needs. At its most basic, everyone sleeps. And the reality is that if one doesn’t sleep, one will eventually succumb and die. Work and familial obligations notwithstanding, you shouldn’t have to explain if you need to lie down and grab a quick snooze.

The Need To Eat

Another bottom level and basic physiological need, eating is subjective to the person. The rules of survival are pretty simple; if you’re hungry, you should eat. Now, bear in mind that hunger can be attributed to more than simply the need for food. Dehydration can cause feelings of hunger, so it’s important to maintain proper hydration levels by sipping water throughout the day. Emotional issues can also cause a person to compulsively eat, which isn’t directly associated to hunger but can cause a person to eat outside the regular boundaries of one’s three meals.

But if you find yourself hungry for the the old fashion reason, that being that you need food in your system, this isn’t something that you should need to explain or justify. In past relationships, I’ve actually had partners who have commented on my eating habits and have accused me of “eating too much” or gaining unnecessary weight through excessive eating. Although I’m not exactly the skinniest dude on the block, I also know that my weight is consistent with my age, size and activity level.

The Need To Recuperate From Illness

This one is near and dear to my heart, especially since I was diagnosed with Type-1 Diabetes when I was 4 years old. Throughout my childhood and into my teens, I would often have friends and later girlfriends, comment on my mood, health and energy levels as Diabetes took its pound of flesh from me. Even into adulthood, I’ve had difficulties when trying to explain or justify needing some down time to myself when overcoming a cold, flu or something Diabetes-related.

I remember one time, I was dating a local woman in on of the towns I was posted in. We went out to an even this one evening when nausea and stomach pain seized me. I told her I would be going home to rest and I could tell she was clearly upset by my early departure. She even made a passive-aggressive comment to others about how we had to leave because I was “not feeling well.” It wasn’t until she came in to check on me the following day and saw the state I was in, did she realize that I was genuinely sick and wasn’t making excuses.

The experience left a sour taste in my mouth and helped me realize that one should never have to explain or justify needing time to medically recuperate. And taking care of one’s health is the second level on Maslow’s Hierarchy as part of one’s Safety Needs, one step above basic physiological needs. I don’t think I need to explain why it’s so important to maintain one’s health and well-being.

This post is effectively an opinion piece. Perhaps there are other needs you feel would be more important and that you dislike having to explain or justify. If so, feel free to share them in the comments section. At the end of the day, the lesson here is that you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Otherwise, the whole house of cards will falter. And as I said earlier, you can’t help others or take care of them before first taking care of yourself. ☯️

A Journey Of A Thousand Paths…

Life is strange in that it doesn’t care about one’s plans. It’s good to have goals; in fact, it’s highly recommended in order to make it through the rigours of life. Someone without wants, needs and expectations will go through life without cause, without purpose. And there is no truer loss than someone going through life without purpose. But despite all these goals and purpose, life usually leads us down a path we likely never would have followed on our own. And this brings about a feeling that no person should ever allow to permeate in their soul: regret.

Regret is insidious, in that it once it’s permeated your existence, you tend to carry it with you for the vast majority of your life. It penetrates, soaks and influences everything you do and every decision you make, thereafter. And if you know anything about me at all, you know that I don’t like to be influenced. I’m stubborn enough not to want it, but wise enough to understand that it often happens without my even being aware. But I digress…

I written about this concept before but I thought it would be ideal to revisit it, especially in light of the fact that some of my topics will effectively need to start getting recycled as there is only so much room in my head for new ideas. The concept is to live your life without regret. This is not only a “should” concept but a “need to” concept. The reality is that regret serves no purpose except to cause suffering, which if you’ve been paying attention, is kind of my thing to eliminate at all costs.

For the average person, regret takes the form of choices they WISH they had made when the opportunity presented itself. One of the most popular I hear, is the one where people wish they could go back and change a pivotal part of who they are or a choice they’ve made. The problem with this is that the here and now, coupled with your experiences, is what makes you the person you are today. Should any of that be changed or altered, the very fabric of who you are as a person would be significantly different.

Let’s take a pretty common example, shall we? Imagine someone who works hard at their job, has a great partner and a couple of kids. This person may consistently say that if they could go back, they’d give themselves some winning lottery numbers. Can you imagine? It seems like a no-brainer, in terms of something one would change. But they say money can’t buy happiness… While this might be true, it can alleviate some of the financial burdens and concerns associated with daily life, which can ultimately lead to a happier one. It can also lead to a corrupt, materialistic existence where instead of that hard-working person who raised a loving family, you get a rich snob who knows that they can basically throw money at any obstacle in their way and don’t have to work at anything, to any significant degree.

This would develop two very significantly different people out of the same person; one who values life and one who’s blind to value. Still regret not wining the lottery? Yeah, me too. I really want to build a small “off grid” home outside the city where noise is non-existent and it’s solely “my” space. And maybe someday I will. The difference is that instead of regretting that I wasn’t born wealthy or won the lottery, I’ll achieve this goal by working hard at it, raising my own money and by the sweat of my own brow. This will drastically alter the value that I place on the accomplishment.

Maybe life would be easier if the path we were on were smooth, flat and straight. That’s a bit of a pot-shot at the local roads in Saskatchewan, where I live. It’s a pretty apt description of our highways but it would be easier in the sense that it would make it simpler to see where we’ve been, where we’re at and where we’re going. But this isn’t how life is designed. The road is meant to have curves, forks and rocky patches. This is necessary for one’s development into the person they’re meant to be. As I’ve come to learn, a smooth, straight road is pretty boring. There’s a better chance of falling asleep at the wheel.

Know that despite the curves and forks in the path that’s lead you here, you are exactly where you’re meant to be. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t work to fix something or change something that makes you unhappy. It simply means that these challenges are your bumps in the road; only you can choose to suffer the impact, or make your way around. Either way you choose will contribute to the overall experiences that build the wonderful person that you are. Don’t live life with regrets. It will serve no purpose and ultimately dwelling on the past will do nothing to repair it. Food for thought…☯️

Family Day

Considering how poor my week seemed to be last week, this week is starting out quite nicely. I started by taking the second half of last Friday off, giving me the benefit of starting a long weekend a bit early. Last week felt as though even a full night’s rest wasn’t adequate to provide proper rest and it left me wondering if there was something medically wrong happening. I actually got next to no sleep through the Thursday night/Friday morning transition and woke up around 4 am, giving me time to do dishes and laundry before work but left me exhausted and craving sleep by lunchtime.

Fast-forward to my leaving work at noon. I was lucky enough that my two Friday afternoon meetings got cancelled, leaving my afternoon wide open. I spoke with my boss and he was amenable to my using a few leave hours to take the afternoon off. I ran up to my local retail outlet and picked up some necessities for the weekend. When I got home, my wife was basically as exhausted as I was, so we decided to be naughty and put the baby in his crib with a view of Netflix on an iPad to entertain him long enough for us to get a nap. I slept the sleep of the dead and woke up just before my oldest son got home from school. Guess I really did need the sleep.

Nathan and I.

My Friday night typically involves entertaining my oldest and spending the evening with him while my wife finishes working online. I sometimes feel that Nathan has felt the effect of having a second child introduced into the mix after four years of having me all to himself. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the cause of some of his behavioural he’s exhibited in the past two years. But we ordered pizza for the boys and Chinese food for the two of us and we all pigged out on take out food. Not a horrible way to start the night.

The weekend was a smooth couple of days of reading newly-purchased graphic novels, snacking and hanging out. The weather’s been a bit too cold for sledding and spending time outdoors, but whatevs. After watching the Paw Patrol Movie, binging Grey’s Anatomy and Squid games as well as writing and researching, I’d say it was a pretty sweet weekend. And this brings us to today, which happens to be a Monday.

Alex and I

Today happens to be a Provincial statutory holiday designated as “Family Day.” On the occasions where I’ve written about some of these so-called holidays, I’ve been able to provide some insight into how they originated and what started them. Of course, that’s usually for silly holidays like “Coffee Day” or “Donut Day.” But in this case, I wasn’t able to find much besides the fact that “Family Day” is a Provincially-based holiday observed on some given way, shape or form in new Brunswick, Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, Ontario and British Columbia.

The holiday is observed on the third Monday of February and has allowed me to have today as a day off. It’s quite nice. Nathan is off school as well and we’ll be spending the day trying to keep him occupied as he usually needs constant stimulation to get through the day. But the additional day off allows me some further rest and shortens the work week to come. Even when one loves their job as I do, it makes for an easier frame of mind.

Try to ignore my double chin…

I don’t think I can picture anything better than cuddling up with one of my boys while we watch a movie, play a game or wrestle on the floor. They both have their own individual personalities and can be challenging but they both provide love to their mom and dad in their own individual way. Do I know if this is how “Family Day” was envisioned? No, not really. But I wouldn’t have had it any other way. My oldest, Nathan, has the entire week off. It should make for an interesting dynamic throughout the week.

My crazy, goofy loin-fruit…

Now that the weekend is over, I’ll return to work tomorrow. Rested, spoiled and happy to do so. Life is pretty good, I can’t lie. Enjoying time with my children and my wife is fantastic. Even though I have all of today as a day off, I’m hoping that the work week will go smoothly. I guess time will tell. The big thing to wonder about is whether they’ll have karate class tonight. I haven’t asked about it but given that it’s a stat holiday for the Province, I guess I’ll have to find out the hard way of we have class or not. ☯️

A Prime Example…

I made reference in my post yesterday, during my not-so-subtle jab at the current state of the world, how this past week has been a bit of a rough one. There are a number of reasons for this and most of them are the result of compounding effect by virtue of medical issues, scheduling issues, triggering issues as a result of PTSD and just plain old life not caring about my plan.

By the time Monday had rolled around, the weight of the previous week had already caused me to sit in a dark corner holding my knees and rocking like a injured school girl, so I tried to find balance by setting some clear goals for myself. One of these goals included making it to all three scheduled karate classes for the week. Monday night would have been the first, which was scheduled from 8 to 9 pm.

This is a bit of a later class than I’ve ever been used to, with the majority of dojos and schools I’ve trained in ENDING their classes around the time that this one is slated to begin. I got home from work last Monday in reasonable mood and hellbent on making it to this class. I helped with dishes and my wife made a wonderful supper of pizza rolls made with crescent roll dough. They were delicious. They were also difficult to carb-count for…

I took what i thought was a reasonable dose of insulin for the amount of pizza rolls I ate. Although I prefer to err on the side of being slightly above normal than below with my blood sugars before engaging in exercise, I’m also aware that there’s a significant level of grogginess that can accompany high blood sugar (not to mention the damage I’m causing to m self) so it’s often a bit of a balancing act. I often fall off the high wire in these balancing acts, and the results usually fuck my night like a bad prom date.

Since I had arrived home a bit late to start with, my window of time was reasonably shortened from what i would usually enjoy but I partook of a dose of caffeine to give me a boost and ate appropriately to prevent an over-filled or bloating tummy. Within an hour, I noticed I had dropped to about 4.5 mmol/L, which isn’t BAD per se, but I knew I would have to wolf down some fast-acting carbs to compensate so I could make karate class.

Within fifteen minutes, my blood sugars had dropped into the 3’s, leaving me dizzy, groggy and sweating like Peter Griffin during a heavy meal. Bear in mind that this was WHILE I was hungrily downing jelly beans like they were going out of style. I hadn’t actually taken enough insulin to prompt this sort of a reaction, especially in light of the fact that I had basically eaten dough with a bit of meat in it for supper.

I had an hour. I worked towards ensuring my gear bag was packed and ready to go, including a book on techniques I had borrowed from the dojo that I intended to return. I worked through that hour in trying to get my blood sugars to level out. Needless to say, they didn’t. Ten minutes prior to the start of class, I was still sitting in my home office with my head in my hands, munching away and trying to bring my levels up. I had barely grazed the 4.0 mmol/L mark.

My wife came to checks on me and I explained what was happening. She passively suggested that given these things tended to happen on karate nights when i was trying to make my way out the door, maybe my body was trying to tell me something. Maybe it is. Who knows? Once I had successfully made my peace with missing Monday night’S class, I changed into some sleepwear and sprawled on my couch to recover and cuddle my toddler. Within the next hour, just long enough to have completely missed class, my blood sugar levels boomeranged in the other direction.

A part of me acknowledges that this is a prime example of life not caring about one’s plan. I may have planned and intended on getting to class that night, but fate and my body had different plans, effectively destroying the goal I had set for the week before I even had a chance to attempt it. Such is life. But like waking up in a bad mood, this somewhat set the tone for my whole week. Luckily, I did make it so some classes.

Long gone are the days where i could rush off to a fitness class, train like a man possessed and throw caution to the wind as I would neglect to worry about my blood sugar levels until AFTER class was done. As I’m getting older, I need to acknowledge that life has changed. And as I’ve written before, one needs to change with it in order to ensure the proper progression of life. My solution will effectively be to have a light snack in the mid-afternoons on karate days and have supper AFTER class. This will help ensure that my blood sugar levels accommodate what I’m trying to accomplish. I’ve only just started returning to karate. It’s not time for me to stop, as much as my Diabetic body is telling me I should. ☯️

Balance Or Polar Opposites?

It’s been a pretty rough week overall and I’m grateful for the arrival of the weekend, in whatever way my time will be used. Things in Canada are a bit chaotic of late, with multiple protests/occupations taking place at various points in the country, including southern Alberta, Windsor, Ontario and the Parliament Hill in Ottawa. It’s a strange scene to watch play out, especially at arm’s length from either side of the struggle.

The irony is that many of the Canadian Provinces have begun doing what this so-called “Freedom Convoy” intended from the start: the removal of mandatory vaccination and/or proof of negative testing. This restriction was ended, here in Saskatchewan on Valentine’s Day of all days. The reason I say it’s an irony is twofold: the protesters still haven’t cut the bullshit and now there are folks protesting AGAINST the lifting of restrictions. Cue the Alanis Morissette music…

It makes me give my head a firm shake, and maybe I’m just like everyone else; tired and exhausted, both physically and emotionally, at the state of the world and the toll that this pandemic has taken. In some ways, many ways, I’m grateful that my children are as young as they are. My toddler was essentially born into the pandemic, so he doesn’t know any different than being at home with limited exposure to the outside world. My 7-year old is generally happy, as long as he has snacks, his device and some time with his old man. But I digress…

The “re-opening” of the world is exciting to some, scary to others and certainly concerning, overall. There’s a belief by some that ultimately, we’re stuck with COVID-19 forever, which may be true. Perhaps the future will mean learning to live with the existence of this virus as we may not be able to completely eliminate it the way we have with previous ones. This leaves us with a continued division where some folks believe that ALL restrictions should be lifted to allow the virus to run its course with others believing that the lifting of ANY conditions is too soon.

My wife and I usually make it a personal policy to stay out of the political arena, for a varied number of reasons. I even have a personal policy of keeping myself out of any hotly-debated issue, such as this one. I haven’t been in the same boat as others where I’ve lost friendships or family relationships (at least not over COVID-19 or vaccination) and I would like to keep it that way. This is why if you read this post again, you’ll notice that my opinion on this topic isn’t present, as such.

It kind of feels as though my country is waiting on baited breath to see how things are going to play out and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit anxious as to the lasting effects all of this will have. I think that if anyone had asked me where I thought the state of the world would be in twenty years when I was younger, my answer certainly wouldn’t have included all of this. The world changes. This is an inevitable part of life. For better or for worse, whether we agree or not, we need to change with it. This is the only way to move forward. Food for thought… ☯️

Help Me Out…

At this point, I’ve written almost 1,100 posts in recent years with at least 700 days in a row of posting without missing a beat. When one is dealing with a broad range of topics covering martial arts, the Buddha Dharma, Diabetes and health & fitness, it can take quite a before we get caught with one’s proverbial pants down and run out of material to write about. Unfortunately, it does happen and even if I occasionally try to switch it up by posting something light and easy, there are times when the ideas don’t flow quite as freely as I would like them to. Such is life. I’m sure there are still tons of ideas I could post about, they simply aren’t coming to me. That’s where y’all come in…

I know that some of you are pretty frequent readers. I know this by virtue of some of the likes and comments I receive and I appreciate each and every one of you who take the time to read the material I write and take the time to acknowledge it. In that spirit, I’d like to hear from you. The following is an easy, one-click poll to help me gear my posts towards what you, my readers, would like to hear more about. This will help me gear my mind towards what i should be focusing on. After three years of blogging, I think it’s time for this step.

I’d also like to point out that I would more than welcome some guest writers. Collaboration is the spice of life and I think there are a number of martial arts practitioners, students of the Buddha Dharma and Diabetics out there who could share their valuable knowledge and experience with my readers. If this is you, then I would invite you to reach out to me in the comments section with your email address and we could get to work on writing something together! I’m starting to place a comment button right in my posts now, so getting a hold of me has never been easier. I WANT to hear from you.

Even the best writers in the world will often experience blocks and if I’m being entirely honest, I’m far from the best so I could use some help. Let me know your thoughts, either in the comments sections, through the comment button or through my feedback forum. I have no plans or intentions of ever shutting down my blog and I would certainly love to continue posting on the daily. So don’t hesitate to share some thoughts, wants and feelings. I’ll always give credit where credit is due and I would love a fresh perspective. ☯️

Happy Valentine’s Day

Last year I wrote a long-winded post (as if I ever write them otherwise) about the background and history of Valentine’s Day and how it’s typically celebrated. Rather than go through that all over again, I thought I would keep things fresh by writing about how WE celebrated our Valentine’s Day, which was done on Saturday. We made this choice due to a combination of needing a babysitter to watch the boys and the fact that our normal, everyday grind would kick back in on Monday and it would be more difficult to have an enjoyable evening.

Our evening started when the babysitter arrived. We’re blessed in that we have a very trustworthy and responsible young woman who lives across the street. She’s been babysitting for us since we moved here in 2016 and Nathan adores her. We’re lucky in that Alexander has also taken to her. An evening out always goes better when a parent knows their children are in good, trusted hands. We locked the door on our way out and tasted the freedom as we embarked on our evening together.

Laura’s dish, which looked as good as it tasted!

We went to dinner at a local restaurant called the Copper Kettle. Featuring a short menu of items that lean on the greek side, my wife ordered a combination of meat and veggies in a spiced sauce with lemon-seasoned potato wedges. I ordered a Bonanza burger with a side of fries because, well… this is me and I need to sample burgers from every restaurant I go to. I should really branch out at some point and experience other meals. But for now, burgers all the way!

We enjoyed our meal in relative quiet with some fun conversation where we discussed plans to do some things with our boys, travel aspirations and goals we’d like to accomplish in life. our food came soon enough and we enjoyed it thoroughly. In fact, my wife, who usually only eats half of her meal and brings the rest home for leftovers, managed to finish her plate off. We asked about dessert but realistically, we both had enough difficulty breathing from a full stomach that we passed.

My burger, which was delicious.

Once we had finished our meal, we had plans to go wander the local bookstore at our leisure then hit up the bulk store for some treats to curl up in front of the television. unfortunately for us, the book store was closing less than half an hour after we got to the restaurant and the bulk store closed at 7pm. Seems kind of ridiculous for a Saturday night. You’d think those business would be open a bit later on the weekends to get all the folks who work during the week, right? But I digress…

We topped our outing with a stop at our local retail chain where my wife let me pick out a fun box of hair dye for her to try and we looked at various items around the store. Not exactly hitting the clubs and painting the town red but we know what we like. We went home and relieved the babysitter, who reported no issues with the boys and went on her way. I usually don’t believe her; Nathan is typically a rolling ball of noise and Alexander is a rolling ball of destruction. I see no reason why they’d be different around the babysitter. But maybe they are. Who know?

Laura’s watch

Once we were home and had the boys squared away in bed, we poured some drinks and sat in our living room to binge-watch some Grey’s Anatomy. We got through an episode when I realized I hadn’t given Laura her Valentine’s Day gift. She insisted she could wait until Monday but my plan was to give it to her when we went out to dinner. Unfortunately, the box was large and square enough that I wouldn’t have been able to conceal it anywhere. So, she got it on Saturday night. I got her a Bulova watch. I’m a big fan of Bulova; they’re excellent watches that last for YEARS.

It was an excellent evening, with excellent company. I couldn’t have asked for better. Hopefully, all of you have the opportunity to enjoy your Valentine’s Day. And should you find yourself alone, just remember: some self-pampering and enjoyment can be a great way to spend the day. ☯️

Unfortunate Choices

“It’s my choice…” How often have we heard those words and wondered why these people haven’t given their heads a shake and wondered if their parents built them a swing set facing a brick wall as children? I have to admit that for the most part, I live my life one step removed from mainstream society. I do this for a number of reasons, including my disapproval of how society behaves and how they focus so damn much on “my rights” instead of “what’s right.” The general population believes that it’s inherently their right to enjoy the amenities that modern life provides without accepting the fact that it carries certain responsibilities that most people refuse to acknowledge.

The above illustration resonates with me, especially in light of everything happening within my own country. When faced with a dangerous virus that threatens the general populace, what do people do? Do they follow the rules and do what’s best for society? Do they take steps to ensure their own safety as well as the safety of others? No, of course not. I had a friend who posted a joke about how they intend to block a McDonald’s drive-thru until they brought back pizzas. After all, that’s how things work now, right?

It makes me sad, especially in light of the fact that the actions of others will always inevitably cause suffering in others. These people refuse to understand and acknowledge that for every action is an equal and opposite reaction, and such reactions are not always positive. It can cause immeasurable damage and MUST be considered, despite the fact that most people will refuse to acknowledge it.

Read the text in the above image carefully. In this scenario, an ignorant person decides to dig a hole into the floor of their cabin while on a boat. This person does this out of some morbid curiosity but secure in the fact that it’s “his own cabin.” Logic would dictate that a sane person should KNOW that digging a hole into the bottom of the boat would cause it to sink. But this person seems ignorant or oblivious to that fact, much like most people dealing with the world in “their own way” nowadays.

The meme goes on to demonstrate how the people in the immediate surroundings who are affected by this person’s choice are “pissed,” with the subject in question explaining that it’s his own cabin so why should it matter? The last line is the most important as it reads, “Personal choice only goes so far when we’re all on the same boat.” The lesson here is that the world is a pretty big place but despite it’s size, we’re all on the same boat and one’s choices affect everyone. As Captain Kirk and Mister Spock would agree, “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one.” yes, I just used Star Trek nerdom to validate my point. It totally holds up…

You may think your’e in the right. And so you may be. You may think your cause is righteous. And so it may be. But one needs to seriously consider the repercussions of one’s actions and how it may be affecting others. Scratch that; how it IS affecting others. No one is immune to karma. All of these folks causing suffering on others will eventually face the consequences of their actions. And no, I’m not able to predict the future. I simply have enough objectivity to see how society is reacting when faced with difficult situations. Makes me think that my “one step removed” should be several more. Time will tell… ☯️