Category: Motivation

It’s All Fun And Fresh Laces…

I was sitting in my office yesterday and I got up for something, either a washroom break or my tenth coffee of the morning, when I felt my left shoe coming loose. now, if you wear dress shoes as part of your work or even often enough outside of work, you know that most dress shoes are made of leather and once you lace them tightly, the leather grips the lace and holds it in place. But for some reason, my left shoe became loose and the shoe slackened on my foot as I walked.

Upon further examination (a totally fancy way of saying “I checked it out), I realized that the lace had some damage to it. The best way I can describe it, is that it became “gloved.” To clarify, “gloving” is known in forensic circles as the effect of the outer layer of the hand’s tissue being forcefully scraped off to reveal the tissue beneath. Although gross, this is basically what happened to my shoe laces; the outer surface was stripped away, revealing a thinner, finer lace beneath. This finer lace provided no support and couldn’t hold its knot once tied.

I purchased a new set of laces and installed them and the problem was fixed. It also got me examining my shoes, which is not really something one does beyond tying them. I came to realize that I’ve had these shoes for over fifteen years. Made of sturdy, stout leather, they’ve served me well in various functions, events, jobs and activities. And although I know that most people would have likely scrapped them in favour of a newer pair by now, they’re still comfortable, usable and provide excellent support.

Before everyone jumps into my comments section and brings up the fact that I’ve been using a pair of shoes for fifteen years (FYI, my grandfather owned shoes for longer and went through worse than I have), I started thinking about how our world has grown to be a disposable one. Products and items last for shorter periods, usually requiring replacement as the cost of repairing them is usually higher and more time consuming than simply replacing it.

A good example would be computers and smart devices. The vast majority of people in the western world now own a smart device and/or home computer as part of their daily lives. Back in the 1980’s when I first set hands on a computer, they were considered a luxury and not an expected part of the household. But most computers these days last only a certain amount of time before they can no longer be “updated,” even if they still work just fine. This can be frustrating to someone who has spent a significant amount of money on one.

I’ve faced similar issues with my cell phones in recent years, where a phone can longer be updated to current software and stop supporting certain apps and programs as a result. This really sucks, since I’ve kept every previous generation of cell phone I have and they all work. So, if all I needed was an actual cell phone, it’d be fine. When you’re paying a substantial amount for a product designed to perform a bulk number of functions, you won’t be happy if those functions are no longer available.

I’m ranting just a little bit here, and some of you may be wondering where the connection is between replacing my shoe laces and talking about electronics. My point is that, much like my grandfather used to say, “they don’t make ‘em like they used to!” The result of this is that we now exist in a world where it has become easier to throw things away and replace them instead of trying to maintain them. I think it’s important to remember that something trustworthy that serves you up well should have every effort taken to be maintained. Food for thought… ☯️

Isn’t It All The Same Sun?

Today marks the start of Daylight Savings Time, which is something that always fascinated and annoyed me throughout my childhood and into my formative years. After all, this time change involves pushing clocks an hour ahead, which causes the inclusion of a 23-hour day. I’ve had all the same complaints as most people have had regarding losing an hour’s sleep on that particular day.

It wasn’t until I reached the age of adulthood that I understood the concept of maintaining the longest period of natural daylight during waking hours, hence “Daylight Savings” but a part of me failed to see the use behind this since I could work whenever, go to school whenever and what did I care when the evening started?

There is some rationale behind it, including the practicality as[ect that if the sun rises too early it can interfere with proper sleep and the start of the actual day as well as reducing the overall use of candle light during waking hours, back before electricity was a common amenity of households. Interestingly enough, a city in Ontario was the first on in the world to use Daylight Savings Time. It didn’t take long for the majority of the world to follow, with only a few exceptions.

Some places are beginning to see the minimal use in Daylight Savings time and are looking at the prospect of discontinuing it. CTV News posted an article about six months ago about how Ontario is passing legislation that could effectively end Daylight Savings Time in the Province. The very Province where it all started may be the first to end it. I live in Saskatchewan where we’re located in a time zone that isn’t affected by time change. My clocks have remained the same for the past fifteen years.

If Canada as a whole decides to end Daylight Savings Time, I know that one person who will be overjoyed will be my mother. Since she can’t be bothered to change her clocks and her watch every six months, her time pieces are usually only accurate for six months out of the year. Part of that seems like comedy; the other part feels like laziness but hey! Who am I to argue with my mother? Hope y’all didn’t have to lose an hour’s sleep, last night… ☯️

Pay Attention To Your Surroundings…

My staff and I have a particular place where we like to spend our coffee breaks. Just a little spot that takes us completely out of the office and away from it for a distance, which allows us to take a walk, get some air and let our heads cool a bit. This location also happens to be surrounded by a number of eateries, many of which I take part of when I forget or neglect to bring lunch to work. In case the description is a bit too vague, I’m describing a food court. We take our coffee breaks at a food court.

A few days ago, we were enjoying a quiet afternoon coffee and chatting about some random things, when I looked up at one of the eateries and noticed a female employee, sitting on a chair near the till. It took me a brief minute and an awkward double take for me to acknowledge that she was picking her nose with the enthusiastic ferocity normally attributed to a seizure. Her index finger was basically buried almost to the second knuckle and I don’t know what she was looking at but she seemed transfixed as she dug for nose gold with a Zen kind of enthusiasm.

I went through the many stages of morbid comedy… Surprise, laughter, judgement and disgust followed by the sudden realization that i occasionally order food there. All of this went through my mind in under a minute and I pointed out the offending party to my colleague, who shared a laugh without any of the disgust that would follow, signalling that he never eats there. I don’t like being sued, so I won’t name the eatery or its exact location but it woke me up to the fact that as pleasant as occasionally eating take out food can be, one really never knows how clean the location one orders from really is.

I don’t really have a point to today’s post. It’s just something that happened that I decided to share. We often see documentaries about cleanliness behind a counter but this was one of the few instances in my life where I actually saw something happening, firsthand. The icing on the cake was when we got up to leave and walked past and the woman in question made eye contact with me and smiled because she recognized me. Awkward. ☯️

International Woman’s Day

All the way back in 1910, a German socialist champion of women’s rights proposed that March 8th be set aside every year as International Women’s Day. It eventually became recognized as a globally observed holiday by the United Nations in the late 1970’s. Through the years I’ve had the pleasure and benefit of being surrounded by many strong, wonderful women. From my mother, who has spent her life caring for her family and children and still does, the women who have carried a badge to help protect the public, all the way to my lovely wife, whom we can all agree needs to be tough as nails in order to put with me after all these years. Here’s to all the women out there! ☯️

Just When I Was Starting To Remember…

Yesterday marked the lifting of all COVID-19 pandemic-related restrictions, here in Saskatchewan. It’s been an interesting run of things, considering that even after two years of wearing a mask, I still occasionally forget to slip one on. Last weekend, Nathan and I went shopping at Walmart and I agreed to get him a happy meal since the location had a McDonald’s. Ironically, he had just received his second dose of the COVID-19 vaccine, so I agreed to reward him with a purchased lunch since I was going to make him sit through doing groceries.

We walked in and I had ordered his food and waited for it, for almost ten minutes. We got his happy meal and I loaded him into the cart so he could eat comfortably. It wasn’t until we walked into the store proper that I realized my face was bare! I was wondering why some people were giving me sideways glances. I had my mask on me, of course. I’m usually in the habit of getting as much fresh air in my lungs as I can before slipping on a mask. In this case, I must have simply forgotten.

The wearing of a mask has long been a debated restriction over the past two years. I write about it now because it was my most disliked. I hate wearing a face mask. I honestly don’t know how medical professionals do it. My hat’s off to them. Considering I’ve found myself having to train and do karate with a face mask, I’m well aware that once the skin gets a bit sweaty, that’s all she wrote! The mask basically sticks against my face like someone trying to choke me with a plastic bag. Not least of which is the fact that wearing a mask makes it difficult for me to wear my glasses. Anyone who wears glasses will totally understand the struggle. I know, I know… First world problems.

The thing is, a face mask will block some particles from spreading. This makes logical sense, since surgical staff wear them to prevent the spread of germs during medical procedures and surgeries. The logical part of my brain understands this. The “semi-logical” part of my brain suggests that it isn’t as overall effective as the professionals may think it is. When was the last time you walked past someone while wearing a face mask and were able to smell their cologne or perfume? Or caught a smell of a local restaurant wafting in your direction through the mask?

This would seem to suggest to me that particles are making their way into my nose, regardless of the mask. This wold SEEM to suggest that if COVID-19 particles are being blown in my direction, I could potentially be breathing them despite having a plate of cotton armour across my face. Doesn’t that make sense? On the flip side, smelling particles known as “odorants” and having active virus particles make their way into your body may be two different things. I don’t know, I’m not a doctor. This post is purely speculative and simply an example of me thinking out loud.

Some believe the lifting of COVID-19n restrictions is too early. Maybe it is. Some believe that we all need to collectively reopen the world and let nature take its course in order to move on with life. Perhaps we will. In the meantime, it will be nice when the impulse to slap on a mask has passed, although I must confess that it’s my intention to continue to carry one with me in my pocket for some time to come. The world isn’t done with this bullshit, yet. Food for thought…☯️

It’s Not All In The Dojo…

Yesterday, I wrote a post about dojo code of conduct and the etiquette that should be observed, regardless of what school you’re in or visiting. It’s a post I’ve written a few times over the past few years, because the concept never changes for me and merits being revisited. Plus, it’s always a good idea to provide information to potential new readers who may not have the time or motivation to read through almost 1,100 of my posts. yes, I may be bragging just a wee bit. I may be full of myself but honestly, who else would I be full of? But I digress…

When I covered a point related to not wasting your instructor’s time, I explained the concept that one shouldn’t JUST be training in the dojo. Although I kept it short (short by MY standards, of course), I think the concept merits further examination. When it comes to something like karate, it’s important to remember that it takes a greater commitment than attending a few classes a week. Although you MAY progress by doing this, the speed and level of your progress would be greatly improved by taking the time to train by yourself, outside the dojo.

When I joined karate, we had three, two-hour classes scheduled every week on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. It was a good spread and I almost always consistently attended all three classes. Over the years, I began to notice a trend where most students would only attend two out of three classes each week, with Friday being the most popular class to miss by virtue of the weekend arriving. For me, Friday was an easier night to train since I didn’t have the burden of homework to concern me before bed. But these absences eventually led to Sensei cancelling out the Friday classes, much to my dismay. I was lucky enough that one of Sensei’s black belts had opened a school of her own nearby and one of her classes happened to be on a Friday.

One of my many quirks (others call them quirks, I call it commitment) that made me somewhat unpopular among my friends, especially when I started dating, was the fact that I would attend class NO MATTER WHAT. This would often be a pain to others, especially during the warmer seasons when we’d be out swimming or sitting around a fire. “Oh, you can miss one class… We’re chillin’ here…” Chill away, lazy folks! Imma go build on my foundation. It sounds like I’m bragging and maybe on some level I am. The point is that I understood, even at a young age that I wouldn’t get to where I wanted to be or have the level of health I wanted to achieve by skipping out on class every time something fun presented itself.

The other problem is that I’d constantly be referencing karate or practicing outside the dojo. Again, others called it a problem; I called it commitment. If we hung out at the beach, I’d soon find myself doing forms on the sand. If we were on a road trip, I’d be using a hand grip strengthener to work my fingers and my grip. That used to drive my friends crazy, especially since I was usually the one driving. If homework was light and it WASN’T a karate night, I was still putting in a couple of hours in my bedroom or I’d go jogging or speed cycling. Anything and everything I could do to improve and increase my overall health and karate development.

It wasn’t always easy. In some ways, a lot of ways, I missed out on a lot of experiences that are considered a right of passage to some. I didn’t go to my prom. I never partied or drank alcohol as a teenager. I never travelled or participated in extra-curricular activities. I just never had the time. I always doing karate. It took me a little over ten years to achieve my black belt, even with that level of intensity and commitment. Of course, there were a number of differences between Sensei’s dojo and many of the ones you see now. Asking to be tested was not permitted; it was up to Sensei to deem when you’d be ready and to test accordingly. And a decade is pretty average in terms of obtaining a black belt in a traditional form of martial arts.

The lesson here is that there really isn’t a bad reason for joining karate, unless your reason is to beat the shit out of someone. So ultimately, if you attend your few classes every week, get a solid sweat in and learn anything, you’ll have still accomplished something. And anything is always something more than nothing. But if you truly want to learn the art, progress and grow into a proficient martial artist, it’ll take more than that. Time is one of the world’s most precious commodities. It the only one we can’t artificially produce or created more of. Giving of your own time is the greatest commitment you can make towards your martial arts journey. And it will eventually yield the best rewards. ☯️

Dojo Code Of Conduct


All the way back in December of 2019, I wrote a post outlining the proper guidelines a prospective student should follow when attending ANY martial arts school. Some of these are simply a matter of tradition, some of them are necessary to ensure that a dojo runs smoothly. Some, mostly all of them, are also a show of respect for the school you’ve chosen to attend. I think we can all agree that even if you’ve studied in a different style or have a different set of core beliefs, you should still show respect when inside someone else’s dojo. ESPECIALLY if your goal is to have it become your dojo, as well. Of course, if your core beliefs don’t align with the school you’re visiting, you likely shouldn’t be joining. But that’s a concept for a different post.

In recent months, I’ve returned to the dojo environment after a significant hiatus. My absence from any martial arts school was equal parts circumstance and COVID-19. But I’ve had the opportunity to observe some students, visitors and outsiders in the dojo I currently train with. Taking into consideration some of the things I’ve observed, I thought it would be ideal to once again share some of the basic principles of conduct within the dojo. This is never an exhaustive list and is often subjective to what’s been seen in the dojo but it’s all good stuff. Here we go:

  1. Bow when entering or exiting the dojo: This seems like a bit of a tiny detail, but it is an important one. It provides a show of respect; respect towards the instructors, respect towards the ones who trained before you, and respect towards the school. It also evokes a sense of discipline. Even though you may not realize it now, that tiny detail begins to lay the foundational discipline that should become the cornerstone of your training;
  2. Ensure your Gi, or karate uniform, is clean and pressed: This one is important not only for protocol and etiquette, but for hygiene reasons as well. And you would be surprised how many people overlook it. There’s nothing worse than someone who assumes that their last workout wasn’t intense enough to warrant laundering their uniform. Make sure it’s clean. Not only does that ensure a more “pleasant” environment for yourself and the other students, it shows proper respect for the uniform you wear on your journey. Keep an eye on the condition of your uniform. If it’s become yellowed and stained, regardless of washing, it’s time to replace it. If there are tears and/or holes, have them repaired (unless they’re unsightly even once fixed). You shouldn’t have to iron your gi but if you do, for the love of ALL that’s good and holy, don’t iron a crease down the center of your pants. Your going to karate class, not a business meeting;
  3. Stand straight and pay attention: When not executing a movement in the immediate moment, it is imperative that you stand straight and tall, heels together and thumbs tucked into the front of your belt. Keep your gaze towards the front and pay close attention to what the head instructor is saying. Try to avoid looking around and fidgeting. A big part of discipline is being able to focus long enough to build an attention span beyond that of a goldfish and if you fidget and spend your time, you may miss an integral piece of information you needed for what you’re working on;
  4. Acknowledge every instruction given: Different styles will have different ways of doing this. Some will choose a shallow bow when the head instructor provides instruction, some will answer in the affirmative by saying Hai (Japanese for “yes”) or something of the like… The method of acknowledgment will depend on the style and school you’re in. But once it’s clear that the instructor has completed providing instruction, this small acknowledgment is not only a sign of respect but provide the instructor with some cursory way of knowing that you’ve understood what’s been said;
  5. No food or drink within the dojo: You would think this one would be common sense, but a martial arts school is no place for you to sip your mocha-choca latte while your kid trains. Since the average martial arts class only lasts about an hour and a half to two hours, you can manage this easily without having food and drink within the confines of a training environment. In recent years, I’ve noticed that it’s become a bit more of a common thing for the practitioners to carry water bottles into the dojo and take water breaks throughout training. I’m pretty divided on this, considering Sensei always use to tell us to use the washroom and grab our drink BEFORE class started, because once you bowed in, you were in until you bowed out. But from a health perspective, I understand better than most that proper hydration is important. That being said, my current classes are only an hour in length and the average person should be able to make it through that short period without necessarily sucking back on a bottle;
  6. Get out of the way: If you become injured or over-tired, bow, step back and sit in seiza (on your knees) at the rear of the class. Stay out of the way and remove yourself from the flow of the class until your fatigue passes or your injury allows you to continue. Of course, if your injury is severe or serious enough to think you need to remove yourself, you likely shouldn’t continue as you could aggravate the injury further. The point is, there’s nothing to be served by standing in the way while others continue and you shouldn’t expect that everyone will stop and wait. After all, this is their time, too;
  7. Don’t show up late: This one is and always has been, a personal pet peeve of mine. Some instructors will say that if you show up late, it’s better to get “some of the workout” in rather than none at all. Although that is a great concept, showing up late can be disruptive to a class and shows great disrespect to your class and instructors. We all have busy lives. It falls to you to plan ahead and schedule things so that you may attend class. Whether or not showing up late is appropriate will be up to your head instructor, but true respect dictates that if you aren’t fifteen minutes early for class, you’re already late. A good example is a recent evening where I had to fight off a bout of low blood sugar and didn’t make it to class. I’m sure that if I really pushed it fought my way down there, I would have been able to make it only a short period after start of class. But such disrespect for the flow of a dojo’s operations shouldn’t be encouraged;
  8. Don’t waste your instructor’s time: Although you’ve likely paid a fee for your presence, the instructor(s) within the school are there to impart their knowledge and skills to you and others. If you aren’t going to put in your full effort, then you’re wasting your instructors time. Effectively, you’re also wasting your time AND the fee you paid. You’re also affecting the other student’s ability to learn properly. Karate isn’t something you can walk into a few 1-hour classes and expect to progress. You need to put in some supplementary time training outside the dojo, on your own. This is the only way you’ll truly progress and make any headway. Otherwise, you may as well join a knitting circle;
  9. Respect and train based on your partner: You will sometimes be paired with someone of lower or higher rank than yourself. If you’re paired with someone of lower rank, you become the example of what is to be taught. If you inflict injury upon your partner, you may discourage them from further learning and you will have gained nothing yourself. If training with someone of higher rank, respect should be given and you should take every advantage to learn from this person as they are in the same position you would be if training with a lower ranked belt. Granted, time has proven that there is just as much you can learn from a lower rank. It depends on how positive your perspective may be…

I’ve seen everything from kids running around, coffee, students fidgeting and looking around… In a school I no longer train with, there was even one guy who showed up forty minutes late for class with a bag of cheeseburgers and ate while the rest of us did calisthenics! Besides the fact that the smell of burgers was killing me, a karate dojo is definitely NOT the place to eating, much less junk food. Even though some of these points could be viewed simply as one’s person’s opinion, it stands to reason that tradition and respect are things that should never be ignored in the dojo.

Folks, no matter what sport or art you study, there will always be guidelines to follow. The martial arts simply have more, and that’s part of the charm. Although the above guidelines are only basic, they apply to any martial arts school you attend. Your specific dojo may have more, and this is one of those moments where it’s important to take the initiative and ask. After all, respect is a primary aspect of karate and all martial arts. Food for thought… ☯

It’s Never Too Late, Until It Is…

“It’s never too late…” How often have you heard that saying throughout the course of your life? It’s a well-known utterance, usually accompanying someone who is doing something said to be beyond the social or physiological limits of their current state. I’ve often read inspirational stories of people in their 70’s getting their PhD’s or parent and child graduating from the same college at the same time, together. Imagine how awkward THOSE frat parties would be? But to some, age is just a number and time seems infinite. I recently read a story about how Willie Nelson earned his fifth degree black belt at the age of 81. You can read that article here.

The big problem with this concept, and trust me when I say that I’m not TRYING to be negative, is that eventually it DOES become too late. Exceptional accomplishments much later in life are the exception, not the rule. This doesn’t make them impossible, simply improbable. And doing so is extremely subjective. Perhaps one person’s specific factors won’t allow for the same level of accomplishment as another. This is true of any point in life, not just the latter part. But eventually, the rigours and responsibilities of life start to accumulate one can find themselves at the mercy of responsibility instead of enjoying the freedom of their own potential. What’s possible becomes a fevered dream, to be dwelt upon during fleeting moments drowned in a cloud of reminiscent drunkenness.

I know that some of this likely sounds negative as hell and once again, it’s totally not meant to be. But since I’m throwing out sayings and utterances, another important one to keep in mind would be, “life is short.” And it is. None of us have any idea when life will take a turn towards that dark tunnel with the light at the end of it, so we should take full advantage. If you spend your life saying that it’s never too late, eventually, time will run out and it WILL be. Although one can always try their best to shoot for the stars, it’s important not to wait on the things that matter to you. Want to train for your black belt? Today is the day you should get started. Want to get on a diet and start losing weight? Don’t wait, get at it. Tomorrow is one more day that you haven’t done what you need to do. “It’s never too late?” Sure, until it is…

Never forget that life should be a pleasant experience. But that takes effort. Happiness should be the first and last thing on every person’s mind in a day but we cause our own suffering, and feeling a sense of loss over the “what if’s” only contribute to that suffering. Despite the pleasantness, life also wasn’t meant to be easy. And one shouldn’t mistake an easy life with happiness. One is not synonymous with the other. One can easily find happiness while still navigating the difficulties of life. What one should never do, is put off the things they want to accomplish. Because eventually, inevitably, the time will come when it WILL be too late. Food for thought… ☯️

Self-Care First…

If you’re anything like me, you work pretty hard towards taking care of others. Whether you’ve found your calling by pursuing a career that allows you to help others or you do volunteer work or perhaps simply take that extra amount of time in your daily routine to throw on a load of laundry, do extra dishes or extra cleaning around the house, helping and taking care of others is an important part of one’s life. If there’s anything that life has taught me, it’s that everybody needs somebody and helping to care for them takes many forms and is important.

That is to say, it’s ALMOST as important as taking care of yourself. Great strides have been made in the past couple of decades towards acknowledging one’s mental health as an integral part of a successful, healthy life. Of course, some have been wise enough to acknowledge that, long before it started being well-known. The important thing to remember is that you’re no good to anyone else unless you manage to take care of yourself first. I’ve previously written about the need to take time to do things for oneself, whether that means reading a book or taking a drive on your own.

Your mental health depends on it, which is why it’s so important. Throughout my life, I’ve experienced toxic relationships where I’ve been hindered or prevented from taking proper care of myself. Not only does this make life far harder than it needs to be but the toll it takes on a person is substantial. All that being said, there are three things you should never have to explain or justify. And those three things play an important role in your well-being. In fact, they represent some of the basic needs that all people have. Here they are:

The Need To Sleep

Sleep is an integral part of a person’s health. Without proper sleep, a person can expect difficulty concentrating, blood pressure issues, cardiac issues and a whole score of health-related issues that no one wants to deal with. When you feel tired or sleepy, there’s no reason you should have to explain the need to sleep. There’s nothing worse than being tired and wanting to lie down, only to have someone require an explanation or accuse you of being lazy.

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs, sleep counts as a physiological need, which is the bottom and first layer of needs. At its most basic, everyone sleeps. And the reality is that if one doesn’t sleep, one will eventually succumb and die. Work and familial obligations notwithstanding, you shouldn’t have to explain if you need to lie down and grab a quick snooze.

The Need To Eat

Another bottom level and basic physiological need, eating is subjective to the person. The rules of survival are pretty simple; if you’re hungry, you should eat. Now, bear in mind that hunger can be attributed to more than simply the need for food. Dehydration can cause feelings of hunger, so it’s important to maintain proper hydration levels by sipping water throughout the day. Emotional issues can also cause a person to compulsively eat, which isn’t directly associated to hunger but can cause a person to eat outside the regular boundaries of one’s three meals.

But if you find yourself hungry for the the old fashion reason, that being that you need food in your system, this isn’t something that you should need to explain or justify. In past relationships, I’ve actually had partners who have commented on my eating habits and have accused me of “eating too much” or gaining unnecessary weight through excessive eating. Although I’m not exactly the skinniest dude on the block, I also know that my weight is consistent with my age, size and activity level.

The Need To Recuperate From Illness

This one is near and dear to my heart, especially since I was diagnosed with Type-1 Diabetes when I was 4 years old. Throughout my childhood and into my teens, I would often have friends and later girlfriends, comment on my mood, health and energy levels as Diabetes took its pound of flesh from me. Even into adulthood, I’ve had difficulties when trying to explain or justify needing some down time to myself when overcoming a cold, flu or something Diabetes-related.

I remember one time, I was dating a local woman in on of the towns I was posted in. We went out to an even this one evening when nausea and stomach pain seized me. I told her I would be going home to rest and I could tell she was clearly upset by my early departure. She even made a passive-aggressive comment to others about how we had to leave because I was “not feeling well.” It wasn’t until she came in to check on me the following day and saw the state I was in, did she realize that I was genuinely sick and wasn’t making excuses.

The experience left a sour taste in my mouth and helped me realize that one should never have to explain or justify needing time to medically recuperate. And taking care of one’s health is the second level on Maslow’s Hierarchy as part of one’s Safety Needs, one step above basic physiological needs. I don’t think I need to explain why it’s so important to maintain one’s health and well-being.

This post is effectively an opinion piece. Perhaps there are other needs you feel would be more important and that you dislike having to explain or justify. If so, feel free to share them in the comments section. At the end of the day, the lesson here is that you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Otherwise, the whole house of cards will falter. And as I said earlier, you can’t help others or take care of them before first taking care of yourself. ☯️

A Journey Of A Thousand Paths…

Life is strange in that it doesn’t care about one’s plans. It’s good to have goals; in fact, it’s highly recommended in order to make it through the rigours of life. Someone without wants, needs and expectations will go through life without cause, without purpose. And there is no truer loss than someone going through life without purpose. But despite all these goals and purpose, life usually leads us down a path we likely never would have followed on our own. And this brings about a feeling that no person should ever allow to permeate in their soul: regret.

Regret is insidious, in that it once it’s permeated your existence, you tend to carry it with you for the vast majority of your life. It penetrates, soaks and influences everything you do and every decision you make, thereafter. And if you know anything about me at all, you know that I don’t like to be influenced. I’m stubborn enough not to want it, but wise enough to understand that it often happens without my even being aware. But I digress…

I written about this concept before but I thought it would be ideal to revisit it, especially in light of the fact that some of my topics will effectively need to start getting recycled as there is only so much room in my head for new ideas. The concept is to live your life without regret. This is not only a “should” concept but a “need to” concept. The reality is that regret serves no purpose except to cause suffering, which if you’ve been paying attention, is kind of my thing to eliminate at all costs.

For the average person, regret takes the form of choices they WISH they had made when the opportunity presented itself. One of the most popular I hear, is the one where people wish they could go back and change a pivotal part of who they are or a choice they’ve made. The problem with this is that the here and now, coupled with your experiences, is what makes you the person you are today. Should any of that be changed or altered, the very fabric of who you are as a person would be significantly different.

Let’s take a pretty common example, shall we? Imagine someone who works hard at their job, has a great partner and a couple of kids. This person may consistently say that if they could go back, they’d give themselves some winning lottery numbers. Can you imagine? It seems like a no-brainer, in terms of something one would change. But they say money can’t buy happiness… While this might be true, it can alleviate some of the financial burdens and concerns associated with daily life, which can ultimately lead to a happier one. It can also lead to a corrupt, materialistic existence where instead of that hard-working person who raised a loving family, you get a rich snob who knows that they can basically throw money at any obstacle in their way and don’t have to work at anything, to any significant degree.

This would develop two very significantly different people out of the same person; one who values life and one who’s blind to value. Still regret not wining the lottery? Yeah, me too. I really want to build a small “off grid” home outside the city where noise is non-existent and it’s solely “my” space. And maybe someday I will. The difference is that instead of regretting that I wasn’t born wealthy or won the lottery, I’ll achieve this goal by working hard at it, raising my own money and by the sweat of my own brow. This will drastically alter the value that I place on the accomplishment.

Maybe life would be easier if the path we were on were smooth, flat and straight. That’s a bit of a pot-shot at the local roads in Saskatchewan, where I live. It’s a pretty apt description of our highways but it would be easier in the sense that it would make it simpler to see where we’ve been, where we’re at and where we’re going. But this isn’t how life is designed. The road is meant to have curves, forks and rocky patches. This is necessary for one’s development into the person they’re meant to be. As I’ve come to learn, a smooth, straight road is pretty boring. There’s a better chance of falling asleep at the wheel.

Know that despite the curves and forks in the path that’s lead you here, you are exactly where you’re meant to be. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t work to fix something or change something that makes you unhappy. It simply means that these challenges are your bumps in the road; only you can choose to suffer the impact, or make your way around. Either way you choose will contribute to the overall experiences that build the wonderful person that you are. Don’t live life with regrets. It will serve no purpose and ultimately dwelling on the past will do nothing to repair it. Food for thought…☯️