Category: Motivation

A Quieter Weekend…

So for some reason, my son had yesterday off from school. He still had the Monday holiday off, but he was given Friday off, as well. I don’t know if my parents thought this, but I can’t help but feel that he gets WAY more days off than I ever did when I went to school. Anyway, because he had a four-day weekend, my mother-in-law agreed to come to Regina and pick him up for the weekend. The result is one less child in the house for the weekend. This posed an interesting opportunity since I typically have a pretty fixed weekend routine. Friday night is when Nathan and I have our boys’ night. Saturday night is when my wife and I have our movie/tv night. Sunday is for laundry, grocery shopping and prepping for the week to come.

With Nathan gone, my Friday night suddenly became open. I’m a creature of habit so I don’t do all that well when there’s a change in my routine. What would I do? An extra movie night? Play with the baby? maybe if I had something resembling a life outside of work, home and karate I would go out for drinks with friends. But I’m not one of those people. Then my wife had an excellent suggestion; I should still have my “boys’ night” but with Alexander. He very rarely gets to hang out in the basement with me and he’s always calling for me when I’m in the house so it made sense and it was a good suggestion.

As much as I love him and as much as I hate to admit it, Alexander often gets overlooked. The reason behind that is quite simple; he and Nathan usually can’t be in the same room for extended periods, lest they harm each other or destroy their environment. I would expect no less from my loin-fruit. But because of this, Alexander is usually relegated to the living room where his toys and the television is located. I’d hang out in there more often but my OCD can’t handle the mess he makes with his toys and when I DO hang out in there, Nathan usually comes to the gate to get my attention and causes all sorts of chaos.

I know, I know… First world problems, am I right? I have two strong, healthy children and that should be enough. But controlling them both is challenging and frustrating, which usually leads to me hanging out with Nathan downstairs while Alexander hangs in the living room. Not last night. Oh no, sir! Not last night… Last night, I had the opportunity to spend some time downstairs with Alexander without Nathan upsetting the delicate balance of tranquility and quiet enjoyment of my toddler. We watched cartoons, played some games and enjoyed some cuddles. It was nice but more than anything else, it was important.

Life goes by in a flicker. A very short flicker. Alexander just turned 3-years old a little over a week ago and it seems like time has just flown. I honestly never knew time could fly by so fast until I had children. But appreciating the little moments makes it all seem better. Alexander and I had a fun night, last night. I’m sure my son Nathan had a god time with his grandmother, as well. Making time for both my children can be challenging but so rewarding and important. ☯️

Life’s Too Short…

One of the big things that I think we can all agree on, is that life is pretty short. I’m sure there are those that feel life drags on, but that isn’t what today’s post is about. The point is, no matter what your background or personal beliefs, no one truly knows what happens after the end of this life nor can we speak clearly with those who have gone on to experience whatever comes next. For that reason, it’s important to recognize that we need to enjoy and experience all the positive things life has to offer while we’re here. Life is too short for regrets.

I’ve often written about how I have no regrets and that remains true. After all, every decision and every life choice, good or bad, has brought me to who I am today. And I’m pretty fuckin’ pleased with myself (at least that’s what my family tells me). But seriously, I’m very happy with who I am as a person and I have to acknowledge that my specific path brought me here, so how could I regret it? Depending on where you are in life, I don’t think it’s so much an idea of regret as it is a matter of working towards making life better. This applies especially, when it comes to one’s employment.

Nowadays, a job isn’t a luxury, it’s a requirement. The unfortunate reality is that money is needed to live a standard life. Even the mor3 creative folks who decide to live “off grid” will need some form of currency in order to obtain the materials and equipment they need to take themselves off grid. Money is the unfortunate common denominator that joins all the worlds problems and solutions, and a job is typically the only way to come by it honestly.

I’ve had a LOT of jobs in my life, starting with being a “card collector” for my local church’s Thursday evening bingo games. Between each game, I would walk the rows and collect all the used and dabbed bingo cards to make room for the fresh ones. What a gargantuan waste of paper! I wonder if they still play that way? Anyhoo, it paid $5 for the evening and usually after a month, I had enough to buy whatever monthly editions of comics I wanted with a couple of dollars leftover. Ah, the good ol’ days…

It was a decent gig for the time and my age but I’ll confess that not all jobs were like that. I remember working in the call intake centre for a well-known courier. The job paid phenomenally but I made the mistake of starting it over the holiday season. As a result, I was getting all the panicky, frustrated people who wanted their packages delivered in an unrealistic timeline because it had to reach certain destinations by Christmas. The stress and anxiety that job caused still makes me wonder how that place kept any staff.

Although it paid very well and I was living my best life at the time, I was absolutely miserable. The very thought of going into work had my stomach in such a knot that I didn’t have a healthy bathroom trip for months. You’re welcome, for sharing that last detail. I was only at the beginning of this career path but I could already tell it wouldn’t be for me and wouldn’t bring me joy, despite the amount of money I was bringing in.

By contrast, my years as a police officer were fantastic. I was happy. I was protecting people and saving lives. I was fulfilled, satisfied and pleased with the direction my life was taking. And once I had been on that career path for a number of years, I was making a salary that allowed me to live comfortably. I wasn’t rich, by any stretch of the imagination. After all, the old saying about “honest cop’s salary” is no joke. By I wasn’t on street eating canned beans. And I got to do what I loved.

The ultimate point to this post is twofold. On the one hand, it won’t be the money that makes you happy. Although you need to consider your family and finances in order to ensure you remain whole, it’s important that you be happy in what you do. And if you ARE, the money won’t be so important. But you need to be realistic about what you want and how you’re doing it, all while being cognizant not to make brash choices that COULD affect your family and home life.

On the other hand, while it’s important not to rush off and abandon a job that may not be a fit for you, the big thing as well is not to contribute to making it a toxic environment. I’m currently aware of people within my environment that do very little than bad-talk and spread negative misinformation on the job. They’re still quite good at what they do but they won’t stop bitching about it. If you’ve reached that point, not only do you need to step away and leave that job behind for yourself but also for the other employees that have to sit there and hear your negativity.

Folks, life is too short. It’s important to do something you love. Or at the very least, something you can enjoy. Money isn’t everything and if you’ve worked hard to get to where you are, you should enjoy the ride. Do what you love and you’ll technically never work a day in your life. And that’s the secret to happiness; find the path that suits you, know what you’re worth and drive towards that. Keeping in mind that if your family depends on you, you don’t have the option of living out of a suitcase while you figure it out. I did say life is short, after all. Food for thought… ☯️

National Day For truth And Reconciliation

Today is a statutory holiday that recognizes the legacy of the Canadian residential school system and the impact it’s had. Although it was first established in 2013, it was elevated to a statutory by Parliament of Canada in 2021. This is the second year that I get to participate by wearing an orange shirt to work. The wearing of an orange shirt was inspired by a residential school survivor who had her brand new orange shirt taken from her on her first day of residential schooling.

To be honest, as important of a day as this is, I don’t believe I could do it justice by trying to explain. There are plenty of resources out there that can properly explain what this day means and why it’s so important. My son has the day off school, but they observed in class yesterday by wearing orange t-shirts. I managed to get my hands on an orange dress shirt to wear for work. Feel free to look it up and read up on it. Even if you just visit Wikipedia or Canada.ca for information, it’s worth the read. ☯️

Tempus Fugit…

It seems like just yesterday that my wife announced we’d be adding a second bundle of chaos to our merry-go-round of a household… How in the light have we reached this point already? Yesterday marked my toddler-no-more Alexander’s third birthday. Because I’m busy and rarely on the ball, I didn’t post about it yesterday. And here we are…

There’s a lot to love about my chunky little red-headed ball of DNA. Besides his endless locks of bright, red hair (an aspect he inherited from both his mother and I) or the fact that he has some reasonable heft and weight to him that makes him formidable to handle, his slowly expanding vocabulary has started to make things interesting as he has begun to express himself and communicate more.

That, and his complicated and often violent relationship with his older brother keep things noisy and “interesting” within the Cook household. Although both brothers whine and pine for each other’s company, they rarely last more than ten to fifteen minutes before one of them ends up in tears. Such is the way with brothers, I guess. But I digress…

I still remember when Alexander was born. I was stuck in New Brunswick on a work-related trip and my wife went into labour during my absence. It took her, her mother and my mother to convince me that even if I jumped in a car and left for my departure airport that very moment, I still wouldn’t make it home in time. I was stuck on the other side of the country when my youngest-born came into the world, no doubt kicking and screaming. The light bless my mother-in-law, who came to my wife’s side and was there when I couldn’t be.

Since then, Alex has present a positive presence in our home. Always quick with a hug or kiss, he has a strong love for fighting and wrestling, hinting that he may be the successor in the martial arts that I’ve been wanting. He has a firm love for all of his family members and will usually get upset when he realizes that any one of us has left the house without him. His sneaky smile when he refuses to comply or listen is even adorable.

Happy birthday, Alexander! I can’t stress enough that I can’t believe it’s already been this long but after only three years, you’ve firmly rooted yourself in our lives to the point where I can’t recall how life felt before you came along. Such is the beauty of children. Here’s to many more happy years, my little peanut! ☯️

A Chosen Path…

Life rarely cares about one’s plans. Light knows that this is something I’ve said in more posts than I can count. And it’s true; life will carry on no matter what steps we take and what path we choose. The thing is, even a chosen path will eventually diverge and split off, leading to consequences and outcomes that we may not want or couldn’t have foreseen. This isn’t always a good thing but it’ll rarely be a negative thing, since one can always make the best of any situation, good or bad. Depending on the choices we make and the decisions we take, it can often seem as though we should simply let go and move onto something else. But the reality is that nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight.

Life doesn’t make it easy to choose a path. After all, life in general will seek to take the path of least resistance by throwing that resistance at us. And as human beings, we’re no different. Sometimes, when things become difficult or we don’t see the outcome we thought we’d necessarily get it can seem easy to lay down one’s sword and surrender. We almost always seek to take the path of least resistance unless we can clearly see a desired outcome. But it isn’t until one has fought through the difficulty that one can hope to reach that desired outcome. It will assuredly never happen on its own.

The important thing to remember is that if one commits to something and work hard to achieve it, one must see it through. Whether one succeeds or fails will depend on the effort one uses but here’s the key lesson… If you try, you may succeed or you may fail. If you don’t try, you’re guaranteed to fail. And depending on what time and resources you’ve spent in order to try, it may cost far more to give up and than it would to push through, even if it isn’t al sunshine and rainbows. I learned that the hard way.

This concept can apply to all things in life. Work, fitness goals, relationship goals or plans for one’s direction in life. Keeping an eye on the prize, as it were, is the only way to ensure the elimination of unnecessary suffering in one’s life and ensure some level or degree of success. As the old saying goes, “work smarter, not harder.” Food for thought… ☯️

Your Health Starts With You

I was having a conversation about Diabetes and A1C readings with my wife this past weekend, when i started to discuss and bring up many of the other folks I’ve known through my life who have Diabetes. It made me realize that for the most part, almost everyone I know who has either Type-1 or Type-2 Diabetes has failed to take care of themselves to the extent that they’ve caused damage to themselves that can no longer be repaired. It’s made me realize just how involved my care has been and how far my training and efforts have brought me.

After four decades of living with Type-1 Diabetes, I enjoy the pleasure of retaining all my limbs and digits, have a clean nervous system, clear kidneys and have the heart of a horse. In fact, I ran a stress test just a few short years ago and even ran the PARE two years ago in New Brunswick against other candidates half my age. But such health didn’t come naturally or on its own. It took a lot of time, training and effort to maintain this level of health and avoid many of the symptoms and side effects of Diabetes that many of my counterparts have had to suffer through.

Before getting on an insulin pump, a lot of my Diabetes control had to be done by feel. Carb-counting wasn’t something I was familiar with and I still adhered to the concept that sugar was what I needed to avoid. That being said, I worked pretty hard on my physical health, pushing myself and my body until I managed to grow and develop without many of the limitations that Diabetes has brought on others. When I joined the martial arts, it gave me tools and methods to ensure I could continue to maintain my health well into my years, which is a practice I still observe today.

None of that is easy and it would absolutely be simpler to just sit back, take it easy and let my body rest. That would likely feel much better but time and others have proven that such a path is what causes quicker complications and a sooner death; two things I’m trying very hard to avoid. None of this means that I haven’t gone down some difficult steps before. In my youth, before I had full control and say into my treatment, I suffered through comas, vision complications and high A1C’s. But once I took ownership of my therapies and the course of my life, I was able to make a measurable difference. And that’s the key takeaway; Diabetes has no feelings, no emotions and doesn’t care whether one lives or dies. This is why it’s up to the person themselves to take steps to maintain one’s health and ensure a longer and healthier life. ☯️

Don’t Get Into A Slump…

Having a routine can be a good thing and can help ensure that there’s some consistency and smoothness to one’s day. If I take myself as an example, I’m comforted by the familiarity of waking up, making my son’s lunch for school, grabbing some cold caffeine and preparing for my day at work. Routines also allow us to save valuable energy as developing some muscle memory almost allows one to operate on auto-pilot, first thing in the morning. If it weren’t for auto-pilot, I’d likely show up to work in pyjamas instead of a suit. But I digress…

As handy as routines can be, it’s also important to recognize that they can bring a certain level of complacency to one’s day. And as we all know, complacency can be harmful, especially if we frame it in regards to something like martial arts. being complacent and set in our routine can be harmful because it could leave you vulnerable in the event of a real-life combat situation. This is why it’s important to throw in something unexpected once in a while.

Breaking one’s routines is also extremely helpful in keeping you from becoming bored with your fitness. If you ALWAYS do the same batch of exercises, every time you work out, you’re more likely to get bored and not WANT to work out. This is especially true in karate, where doing the exact same warm-up for every class will have some of your students’ eyes glazing over in a pinch. By changing things up and incorporating different workouts, it keeps things dynamic and engaging and will help with retaining students.

In my younger years, we would occasionally train outside during the summer. It was a small change and pretty rare but it added a little something. On occasion, I would train while under water. Not my head, mind you… I’m rather fond of breathing. Once in a while, I would train with my bo staff next to a local fountain. All of these things added a touch of flavour to my overall training that kept things interesting and exciting. If all one does is show up to the dojo, train for that class and go home, over and over, chances are you’ll hit a slump and be far more likely to do that whole “temporarily quitting” thing. ☯️

Tik Tok, Motherf&%ker…

Ah, social media… The cause and solution to all of life’s problems… I remember a time when life was far simpler. Maybe I’m aging myself here, but it’s true. Throughout my childhood, there was no internet, no smart devices and no “big brother” watching everyone’s every move and uploading it, as soon as you fell flat on your face. I’m actually pretty grateful for that last part and like most of my generation, I am eternally grateful that all the stupid things I did in my youth haven’t been documented on YouTube or Facebook.

That being said, the advent of modern internet changed the game in a. Lot of different ways for the world. Besides having the world’s information at one’s fingertips, which is not ALWAYS a good thing, communication with friends near and far became an instant possibility. I remember the days of ICQ… Ah, good ol’ ICQ… This was an instant messenger program that one could use on the computer to “chat” with other ICQ users. Unlike modern messaging apps, you had to know the handle of the person you wanted to add and you both had to be on for the program to be used. The familiar chime of receiving a message still rings in my ears, though…

Then came MSN Messenger… A bit more modernized and tethered to one’s free, web-based email accounts, it had a number of features that previous programs didn’t. With the advent of the smart phone came apps, and all the glorious social media-related bullshit that goes along with it. Although my post today is intended as a bit of a rant against what seems to be an unfortunate trend, it’s also allowing me a brief walk down memory lane, proving that even when discussing something negative, there’s some positive to be found. But I digress…

One of the issues I’ve noticed in recent months is the use of TikTok. Yes, yes, it’s been used for longer than that; that isn’t the point. TikTok was developed less than a decade ago and is a social media platform primarily used for documenting short videos, music clips, memes, you name it! It’s popularity has skyrocketed, with many of my friends trying to encourage me to use it. No, thank you but the app is no different than anything else that gets released and becomes popular. In the years to come, there will likely be something else that gets released. Such is modern life.

The trend I’m referring to, is something I ironically noticed through Facebook. Although mainly there, I’ve also come to realize that various news articles feature this unfortunate trend on news pages, as well. I’m talking about employees and staff recording TikTok videos of themselves doing bad things on the job or ranting against customers, managers, the public… whatever! This surprises me, because we live in a world where once you put something out there, it’s out there. There’s no taking it back.

My question is, what do these folks expect that they’ll do if their current employer sees this? Some of the antics I’ve seen clips of, would certainly be fireable offences. What’s even worse, since it’s now out in the world, if one were to get fired for these clips, how would one avoid having prospective employers see it and refuse to hire them as well? Given that Google and Facebook searches are a pretty common tool when looking to hire someone, it would make sense that searching for such clips would be a logical next step.

Despite my love/hate relationship with social media and its many forms, it’s here to stay with no danger of disappearing. What’s important to bear in mind is that there is n going back when it comes to posting things. Once it hits the internet, it’s up there somewhere, forever. This is why it’s important to be mindful of what one does online and what one posts. It can mean the difference between success and roadblocks. In my time, we had the benefit of telling stories about our rambunctious youth. Nowadays, one’s foolish decisions are out there of all the world to see. Not so great and a hell of a thing to try and explain to one’s grandchildren someday. Food for thought… ☯️

Food For Thought…

I often end my posts with the line in the title, and for good reason. Although my posts are mostly aimed at providing information about Diabetes, martial arts, health & fitness or the Buddha Dharma, I often provide my insight and opinion on various topics, as well. Which is all well and good. But as I often write, one’s opinion is simply that: an opinion. Opinions are particular because they often come unsolicited and unasked but can lead to important information and knowledge that the recipient may not have thought of.

The important thing to remember is that as the provider, if you offer your opinion you should be ready and willing to acknowledge that it may not be well-received or appreciated. If you’re the recipient, you should recognize that your opinion may not always be wanted and may not be recognized, regardless of how informed and knowledgeable you may be on the topic at hand. That’s why I was pleasantly surprised when an old friend of mine posted a photo on his timeline that spoke to me. I’m not sure where he got it and no, I won’t be asking because I don’t need to open that door, but here’s the photo…

This meme speak to me. Minus the first and last sentiment… I believe that a fact can still involve emotion, depending on what you’re speaking about. The last sentiment is somewhat particular, because I believe that as a society, we use the term “stupidity” far more liberally than we should. Ignoring facts makes you uninformed, not stupid. Stupidity is repeating a same action over and over and expecting a different result. That, and thinking that your opinion IS fact. Or continuing with the same opinion despite being educated on the facts. But I digress…

Not all of my posts can be in depth and substantial. Sometimes, I just need to share something that speaks to me. Like this meme does. Food for thought…☯️

Facts To Go Up In Smoke…

It’s not exactly a hidden secret that I enjoy an occasional cigar during my downtime. In fact, in recent months I’ve seen my “enjoyment” go from an occasional once or twice a month indulgence to a couple of times a week. Although it doesn’t particularly rank high on the list of things that are good for you, having the ability to sit quietly and enjoy a decent cigar provides a number of mental and relaxation benefits for me, the likes of which I haven’t encountered elsewhere in any easy way. Unlike meditation, sitting with a nice cigar allows for interruptions, such as kids asking questions or performing other tasks.

So where do cigars come from? According to a blog post I recently read, “Historians generally believe that the cigar was invented by the ancient Mayans, who would wrap the tobacco in a palm or a plantain leaf and smoke it.” The post goes on to explain that a Mayan pot from the 10th century has an image depicting a man smoking a cigar. You can check out the blog post here (hopefully the link works). the bottom line is that a cigar is considered a tightly rolled bundle of dried and fermented tobacco, which is usually sealed up at one end.

There are several different blends, sizes and brands of cigar, ranging from a variety of different places across the world. Although most sources will cite specific places and brands as being top quality and the Cadillac of cigars, but I’ve come to realize that for the purposes of relaxing, size, brand and style of cigar is completely up to the user. One doesn’t need to spend an absolute fortune on a cigar in order to enjoy the relaxation that comes from smoking one. For example, my favourite cigar is the Casa Magna Gran Toro cigar from Nicaragua. It retails at $16.99 and is the most expensive end of cigars that I enjoy.

If you’re cheaper than I am, you can usually find comparable examples for about ten dollars. Although that’s only a little cheaper than an average six-pack from your local liquor store, it’s important to bear in mind that unless you’re an unruly teenager striking out against one’s parents, you don’t get drunk more than once a weekend, so the safe bet is you likely wouldn’t be having more than one cigar a weekend. And since it can take well over an hour to properly enjoy a cigar until its end, you’re good to go. Granted, the big difference is there’s less of a stigma against sitting outside during daylight hours smoking a cigar than there would be against sitting outside during daylight hours hammering back a drink. But I digress…

So, what does enjoying a cigar entail? Well, the first step would be to pick one out. There are plenty of sites that will explain to you how to properly pick out a cigar and much like the fact that I wouldn’t presume to explain to you the quality of wine, I won’t try and tell you what cigars you should buy. Although I enjoy both, I’m an expert of neither, so you can look into how to properly pick out a quality cigar on your own. But once you’ve picked your cigar, you’ll likely need to cut the closed end. For this, you’ll need a good single-edged cutter. Trimming the closed end to expose a smooth, flat circle is important because this is where you’ll draw from.

Take it from me and spend the few dollars to purchase a reasonable cigar cutter. I once tried to cut a cigar using a pair of scissors and it did not go well. This is because the pressure of the scissors will cause the outer wrapping to not only buckle and tear but the scissors will likely damage the glue holding the outer binding and your cigar will likely come apart while you’re trying to smoke it. Then, you light the tip, preferably with wooden matches to avoid souring the cigar with a modern lighter. You don’t want to set the cigar in fire. Rather, you want to slowly turn the cigar slowly and allow the tip to burn lightly and evenly.

A cigar is meant to be enjoyed slowly and pleasantly, puffing and taking the smoke into the cheeks and exhaling lightly. You want to avoid inhaling into the lungs, since they’re significantly stronger than cigarettes and will irritate your lungs to no end. And smoking it too quickly will usually cause you to become nauseous and feel sick. A cigar is meant to be slowly enjoyed and savoured. If you want something fast, do shots. That shit is quick. Look at me, encouraging all sorts of vices…

Last but not least, enjoying a cigar is a very particular form of relaxation and is pretty niche, meaning that very few people will usually enjoy along with you. Most certainly, it’s something that’s extremely hard to enjoy around folks who don’t partake of them, as well. Personally, I keep a chair and table inside my garage and enjoy them by myself during the warmer months of the year. Either way, vices are to be enjoyed minimally or sparingly and cigar smoking is no different. ☯️