Sensei has always told me that I have two ears and only one mouth, so I should listen twice as much as I talk. I think he got that from someone else and he was mostly trying to get me to shut the hell up in karate class, a feat that is impressive, in and of itself. After all, getting me to be quiet is difficult on the best of days, even in controlled environments. But there’s something to be said for learning to be still and quiet. After all, those are important factors required for effective meditation. But even more importantly, they’re required for everyday life.
Being quiet allows others to speak and express themselves. by doing this, you can get to the root of the message that others are trying to impart. This usually doesn’t happen if one is flapping one’s jaws. This is a lesson I wish I had learned early on in my career. Maybe I would have learned more than I did or allowed others to have chances that were only prevented by the fact I didn’t listen as deeply as I should have. One will never know.
If you’re in a leadership role, being silent can allow your team to express themselves and provide insight without being clouded by your view. Time has proven that once a leader has spoken, their team will usually formulate their own opinion by what the leader has said. This is referred to as being “yes-men.” Allowing others to speak first will engender creativity, brain-storming and ACTUAL thought as opposed to blind agreeing. If you quiet your mind along with your voice, you have a better chance at finding peace and balance. It’ll also allow your thoughts to bring you to better and more positive conclusions and better outcomes.
In a world of constant stress and fast-moving lifestyles, learn to be still. It will help reduce that stress and slow down that lifestyle. That’s something everyone needs. And in doing so, one can begin to reduce the amount of suffering within one’s life, which is kind of my jam. And helping to eliminate one’s own suffering allows for one to help eliminate suffering in others. Kind of important if we expect any of that world peace stuff everyone keeps talking about. So, learn to listen. Learn to be still. Food for thought… ☯️
We live in an unfortunate world where if you accidentally burp in a public place, there’s a good chance some wangless douchebag caught it on their phone and uploaded to whatever social media platform they’re trying to get free stuff on. I sometimes feel extremely grateful to have grown up during a period of society where not EVERYTHING was documented by every person who walks by, where if someone is having a genuine emergency and needs help, people are running for a phone to call for help and actually contribute to that help instead of whipping out their cell phone.
Despite my love/hate opinions in how society conducts itself, one significant benefit of the age we live in, is the fact that our technology allows us the benefit of the very thing I’m complaining about. For example, if my toddler does some adorable, destructive thing, like beat the shit out of his brother who’s literally twice his age and size, I can capture the memory in seconds. This makes for a rich book of memories that I can look back on, years from now and remember. I still have nights where I look through my photos and videos and reminisce about my first day watching cartoons with Nathan when he was born, or the day he slipped into a horse stance and downward block.
I imagine all the times in my life that would be wonderful to look back on and reminisce. My parents made a point of taking photos of me here and there but there are pinnacle moments in my life that were never documented. My first steps, my first time riding a bike… Getting my black belt. So many times that documenting the event would have been great. I think of all the times my father and I went swimming in the forest or hiking, biking long distances together or even watching the latest Star Trek movie… It’s the photos not taken that we regret the most. But the important thing to remember, if one CAN remember, is the memory.
There are plenty of times in my life that I’m grateful weren’t documented. But it’s the photos not taken that I wish I had. I imagine if I could have had a photograph of my brother and I, in the week before he went into the hospital for the last time. Imagine that? I have everything in my mind, focused and clear. But they’re memories that I’ll ever only be able to share with others in word or written form. It’s like someone who looks through a family album and asks where the dad is; chances are, he’s the one taking all the photographs.
Enjoy the memories you make. It isn’t by staring through the lens of a camera that you’ll make those memories; it’s by experiencing them. Do I have photos of every family trip or important milestone in my life? No, but that means I got to LIVE them. That’s what’s important in life. one of the greatest experiences in my life was travelling to Japan and Okinawa. I have TONS of photos and videos of that trip. Know why? because Sensei loved me enough to document the entire trip for me. because he’d been there a dozen times before and wanted me to experience it. It’s a lesson one needs to realize. It can’t be taught. Food for thought… ☯️
We often hear that we live in a world of increasing technology. Realistically, I would be more inclined to say that we live in a world of EVER-changing technology, with the face of the world changing constantly with it. One of the big things that have changed for the worst, is how society has become more immersed in its technology than the biological world around it. I’ve written about this on a few occasions. Kind of hard not to, with almost 1,500 posts… If I didn’t start repeating myself at some point, we’d have a problem. But the biggest example of this phenomenon includes people who suddenly have an opinion or decide they can argue by virtue of the fact that they’re protected by the other side of their device.
But likely the one that’s even worse than being an armchair warrior with an over-inflated sense of self, are the phone zombies. You know the ones, they’re the people who walk around in public places, on the street, in businesses and everywhere, while staring down at their phone instead of watching the world around them. Although I’d love to blame the technology, people are usually pretty ignorant of their surroundings, in general. I have a bit of a biased outlook on this, since police and martial arts training have a tendency of making one significantly aware of one’s surroundings. The average person does not seem to have ability. Or care to learn.
For the most part, people in public places will be fixated on their own goals and destination and will usually ignore anything or anyone in their path. Not only is this incredibly dangerous, but it’s also incredibly ignorant. There’s nothing worse than walking down an aisle somewhere, only to have some jack-ass nearly take out my ankles with their shopping cart. Or having them stop right in front of me and block my way and when I clear my throat and they’ll literally turn and look at me and make eye contact, just to go back to what they were doing. Then, I might even push it further and say “Excuse me,” which goes completely ignored, as well.
Now folks, I am about as far from perfect as one can get. In fact, I could bet really good money that I’ve inadvertently gotten in someone’s way or blocked their path. But when someone points it out and asks to be let by, for the love of the light, people! Get. The Fuck. Out. Of the way! Needless to say, there’s also the aspect that paying attention to one’s surroundings and being considerate of others could potentially save one’s life. If someone intends to do you harm, where do you think your best chance of surviving lies? By having your eyes up and seeing the threat coming? Or having your head down in your phone, updating your Twitter-Tik-Face-gram-chat?
It’s important to be aware of one’s surroundings. For your safety, the safety of others and last but certainly not least, to have one’s eyes on the vast, wonderful world around you. Life comes down to the things we experience, not the screens we stare at. If you spend your whole life staring at a screen, life will quickly pass you by. Food for thought… ☯️
Thos of you who have been reading my posts fort a period of time no doubt remember that I’m a big fan of cycling. During the summer of 2020, I actually burned my way through several bike tires and at least two bicycles. I purchased a new one, which I used last year. But during the 2021 year, what with the pandemic and being stuck at home with little else to do, I somehow managed to rack up over a thousand kilometres over the duration of the entire year. Although some of that included running, walking and elliptical, the majority of it was cycling and I was quite impressed with myself, that I was able to reach that level of distance over the year.
This year has been significantly different, with barely any opportunity to get out on the bike. This is attributed to a series of different reasons, not limited but including poor weather, increased karate attendance, work and illness. As a result, I’ve only had the chance to get out on the bike about a half dozen times this year, totalling in only 97 kilometres. But somehow, walking, elliptical and running has accounted for over 1,600 kilometres of the 1,864.4 I’ve racked up this year. I’m of the opinion that it should usually be the other way around.
Although I could likely still get some mileage in, the weather is getting colder and snow may soon hit the ground. I’ll have to make a point of spending more of my workout time on the bike, come next spring. I have to be honest, I rather missed being out as much as I used to. There’s nothing quite like being out in the fresh air, peddling away, working up a sweat while listening to your favourite tunes… It’s good for blood pressure, blood sugars, cardiac and overall health. With the coming of winter comes a period of trying to find something that could replace cycling in addition to karate classes. As the old saying goes, the waiting is the hardest part. Maybe I should have gotten off my ass more and cycled more. Lesson learned for next spring… ☯️
I think one of my biggest love/hate relationships is with action or martial arts movies. On the one hand, I absolutely love me a good action flick. John Wick, are you kidding? Love that movie. Kickboxer, Bloodsport and the original karate kid movies, to name a few. On the other hand, watching a fight scene for me is like trying to watch a science fiction movie with Neil Degrasse Tyson; he’s likely going to point out all the impossibilities in a sci-fi flick. I’m really no better.
Movie fight scenes are usually the climax of the storyline, with two combatants or more squaring off against one another and fighting, usually for their lives, for whatever cause or justice they may be seeking. The prolonged nature of these fights usually present certain impossibilities when it comes to a real life fight. First of all, the sheer amount of daily training that fighters have to go through in order to make it through a professional fight is unreal. And those are only a few minutes per round, at best. So seeing a thirty minute fight with high flying techniques and impressive shows of strength and some acrobatics thrown in, isn’t just unlikely; most human bodies can’t sustain that level of exertion for that long.
But the biggest issue I have is with all of the hits to the head that we see in movies and on television. The opponents exchange blow after blow after blow and just keep right on fighting until the penultimate moment where one overpowers the other. The problem with this is that the ability to shake off a strike to the head isn’t something you can train for. And getting punched or kicked in the skull can cause all sorts of short term injuries and effects, the likes of which we usually don’t see on screen. I’m writing this post in the aftermath of having taken ONE punch to the head recently,
Even one strike to the head can potentially cause headaches, dizziness, blurred or darkened vision, memory loss and problems with one’s balance. If your head is struck in just the right way, you can potentially suffer a concussion, which is a traumatic brain injury that usually results from the brain jostling around inside the head. According to an article posted by the Mayo Clinic, “Some concussions cause you to lose consciousness, but most do not.” This is important because it continues to impress me how some people, even in karate, have often said ‘Oh, you don’t have a concussion because you didn’t pass out.’
Although most mild concussion will pass in a short period of time, you should seek out medical attention if you experience bouts of frequent vomiting, if you do lose consciousness, bleeding from any orifice or if your symptoms worsen over time instead of getting better. Hopefully I’m not freaking anyone out; not every hit to the head will cause any or all of these issues. It’s just something to be cognizant of. After all, I got hit to the head last Wednesday night and had a light headache for the evening but was fine by the next day.
While there’s nothing wrong with enjoying it, don’t believe everything you see on television and in movies. Even if you are a karate practitioner and train consistently, don’t assume you’ll necessarily be able to maintain a sustained confrontation and experience multiple hits to the face and head and just keep going. Your body just isn’t designed to take it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go watch Karate Kid. Sweep the leg! ☯️
Something interesting happened to me last week that allowed some insight into myself and how I’ve managed to jump on the proverbial societal bandwagon. Although I don’t necessarily fancy myself a rebel, I always tend to assume that I’m one off from society, considering I tend to walk my own path and don’t really follow trends or what’s considered cool. But one thing that didn’t take a lot of effort on my part was getting a smart phone. From the moment I purchased a Blackberry in 2007 and the ensuing argument with my ex-wife because of it, I’ve always owned and actively used a smart phone.
The advent of the smart device revolutionized how people live, communicate and surf the internet. In fact, the average person surf’s the web on their smart device far more than on their computers, which has become the common trend. Don’t ask me for a stats source on that one because I don’t have one. This has simply been my observation. But it’s true that it’s pretty rare to go out in public and see someone without a smart phone in their hands, in their pocket or somewhere nearby. Generational gaps have closed as well, with all ages of people taking part.
Last week, my day started pretty typically for a day off. I woke up, had some caffeine and started playing my daily challenges on my phone. By the time I had made it through my app routine, checked the couple of social media platforms I actually subscribe to and watched an episode or two of something since my toddler was binging his fuckin’ Paw Patrol, the battery on my phone was down to about a quarter capacity. Being the responsible phone owner that I am, I plugged it in to charge since I was just sitting at home. My wife and I had some breakfast and we discussed needing a few things from the grocery store and I offered to go get it.
After prepping a short list of items and discussing meals for the weekend, I left the house and made my way to the local grocery store. There was only one thing amiss; once I reached the grocery store, I tried to pull my phone up to start my mileage tracker and realized I didn’t have my phone WITH me. It only took a moment to remember that I had left my phone to charge next to my bed, which is where I keep the charger to use overnight as I sleep. I remembered the few items I needed so for the short period of time that I would be out of the house, I didn’t really feel I NEEDED to have my phone on me. I walked into the grocery store and began my shopping…
I’m part of one of the last generations who can say that they spent their childhoods without anyone being able to get a hold of them when they were out of the house. When I wanted to get a hold of someone, I had to call their landline and leave a message with the hope of a response once they returned home. And if I DID get someone on the line, I didn’t have to ask ‘where are you,’ since I already knew they had to be at home in order to answer. so what could possibly go wrong with being out of the house for an hour without my smart phone? Well, there are some issues with that line of thinking.
Having a smart phone on oneself at all times allows for the ability to contact your loved ones in the case of an emergency without issue; something that wasn’t possible about twenty years ago. But that safety net brings with it a sort of addiction that one never notices because they always have their phone on them. But as I shopped, I found myself feeling a mixed sensation of anxiety and relief. The anxiety came from not having that safety net on my person. The relief came from not having that safety net on my person. And no, that’s not a typo, I meant to write it that way.
There’s a certain sense of freedom that comes from being untethered from one’s smart phone. Most people remember to bring their phone over anything else of importance, like keys. But being disconnected can be comforting. By the same token, I recognize that I’ve become so used to always having the world’s information at my fingertips and always having an open line of communication to anyone trying to contact me. Suddenly being separated from that is what caused the anxiety. But it was an enlightening experience. technology has become a common and expected part of our reality. Don’t believe me? Turn off the wifi in someone’s household for an hour and see how everyone reacts. It ain’t pretty. For myself, I think it’s shown me enough to convince me that I should occasionally “treat” myself to some device-free time. ☯️
I’ve always said that one should never have regrets. After all, it’s kind of hard to regret any choice or action, good or bad, that may have brought you to the here and now. After all, it would mean you may have become an entirely different person and that person may not be the awesome one we see, today. However, no regrets doesn’t mean no reflection and looking back on where you’ve been and what you’ve done is significantly important, if not only for the fact that those who forget the past may repeat it, but because reflection is important for self-development. But before I go too far into a philosophical post, that isn’t the purpose of today’s post.
A couple of decades ago, I made a life choice that would ultimately set me on the path of my current life. After a failed attempt at getting through college and no immediate direction in life, I made the choice to enlist in the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. It was a difficult choice, since neither my family nor Sensei approved of this choice but it felt right for me. I signed up and attended an information session, which was said to be the first step in the application process. When the info session wrapped up, we were all expected to sign up for the written exam. When I found out the written exam was several hours long, I asked about accommodations for Diabetes, which led to the response that Diabetics weren’t accepted.
My grandfather and I, the week of my graduation.
Although my plans were essentially crushed, I considered them only to be “on hold.” As is the case with most things in life, nothing lasts forever and I knew that eventually I might be able to find a way in. Municipal police forces in New Brunswick required attendance at Holland College in PEI, which I couldn’t afford. So I had to bide my time and continue to develop myself, which I did. I focused on my fitness. I gained life experience and grew my professional portfolio. I took a lot of steps towards ensuring that if/when the day came that I would be a prime candidate, regardless of Diabetes. And sure enough, that day eventually came…
In April of 2009, I travelled from Dalhousie, New Brunswick to Regina, Saskatchewan to begin 24 weeks of intensive training that would mold me into a Mountie. It was a rough six months and my troop and I went through a number of ups and downs during that time, including the loss of some of our troop mates for varying reasons. But when we finally reached that initial finish line and received our badges, we stepped out into the world with the intention of doing whatever good we could. And that all started at graduation, on October 13, 2009.
My parents and I
It would become something of an ironic joke that I was posted in Saskatchewan, especially since I’m fully bilingual and there were seven bilingual positions available in New Brunswick and only four of us in the troop spoke French. But I accepted my posting with grim determination and accepted it as a way of starting a new chapter in my life and leaving behind some painful ones, back home. I was posted to a small town in west-central Saskatchewan called Kindersley. This would be where I would be posted the longest and where I would meet some of the best people I’ve had the honour of working with.
I’m sure I don’t need to explain that being a police officer isn’t all fun and games. There’s a lot of negative involved, including the constant need to be hard on people, dealing with death on a constant basis and often seeing the darker side of society, even when it’s from people you wouldn’t have assumed would be so. Couple that with the fact that policing is no longer a respected career path and people don’t give credit where credit is due anymore, made for some VERY choppy waters to navigate. But I’ve looked back on my policing career and have had the benefit of knowing that I’ve saved lives. I’ve prevented and solved crimes. I’ve found missing persons and I’ve trained others to follow in my footsteps, which up until recent years was the most satisfying aspect of said career.
My wife and I
My policing career also brought me a number of things in my life, outside the sphere of law enforcement. I met my wife in Saskatchewan. Both my sons were born in Saskatchewan and I’ve come to know this place as home. In 2010, the few of us from my troop who were posted to Saskatchewan met up and did a shot of Fireball to celebrate our completed year with the Force. As the years melted away, that number was increased to accommodate the given anniversary. Two shots at two years, three shots at three years, etc… It was a tradition that I had been keeping alive, but I’ll admit that at the 10-year mark, it was starting to get difficult, bordering on alcohol poisoning, to continue on.
As this year marks 13 years since I walked into the RCMP Training Academy at “Depot” Division, I don’t think I’ll be downing 13 shots of Fireball. I may just have to find some different way of celebrating and develop a new observance. As I get older, I’m realizing I don’t have the constitution of a teenager anymore. Hell, I didn’t have the constitution of a teenager when I WAS a teenager. But I digress… It’s been a hell of a ride and I’ll always look back on my time with the Force with pride and fond memories, even in the face of the pain and difficulty that came with the past few years. I don’t know where all my troop mates have ended up and where their careers have gone. But i know I miss them al and hope they’re being safe.
Here’s to ya, lads! I’d love to share a photo of my troop but knowing that some of them may be involved in dangerous assignments where their identities are confidential and everything on the internet is free game, I’ll reserve those photos for myself. Although I’ve set down my badge to pursue the next chapter of my life, my blood will always be blue. And I hope all of my troop mates are taking a moment to appreciate where they are, this day. Ironically, Troop 5’s 13-year anniversary on October 13th. ☯️
As I explained the last time I posted this, this is my fourth time posting this material and no, I’m not being lazy. I consider the consumption of vitamins and minerals to be an important part of maintaining one’s health. It’s no surprise that modern nutrition is sorely lacking in most people and with every reposting of this material, I’m reminded of the importance of taking a steady multivitamin on a daily basis; a fact my doctors keep reminding me, as well. With the colder weather hitting our area (we’ve had frost on a couple of mornings, already) and everyone’s immune system taking a hit, vitamins and supplementation are very important. So, bearing in mind that I’m not a doctor or nutritionist, here’s what I posted all the way back in June of 2019. Enjoy!
One of the key reasons behind the consumption of food is to obtain carbohydrates for energy. The human body requires energy to carry on normal functions and, well… stay alive! But what else do we get from the food we eat? A proper diet will also include a number of vitamins and minerals that we require to maintain proper health, growth and energy levels within the body. We’ve all heard about getting enough vitamins from a young age. I remember getting my Flintstones vitamin everyday as a kid.
But if you’re like most people, you’re likely wondering what these vitamins are for and what they do. My goal is to cover off the main ones here:
Vitamin A: This is an all-around vitamin that provides a number of functions including but not limited to the proper health of various bodily functions, tissues and helps to fight chronic disease and is known to be good for the eyes.
Vitamin B: This one is a bit complicated, as there is a large grouping of enzymes, vitamins and minerals that fall under the “B” category. In general, B-vitamins are used for energy production, immune function and absorbing iron. Some them include B2 (riboflavin), B3 (niacin), B9 (folate) and B12. There are a few more that I can’t recall, but B12 is considered amongst one of the most important of vitamins overall because it helps you turn food into energy.
Vitamin C: At some points, this one has been referred to as the sunshine vitamin. I’m thinking that’s mostly because people’s main source of Vitamin C is from citrus fruits. But this vitamin also helps with iron absorption, immune function and is a natural antioxidant that helps with the elimination of free radicals. Eating citrus fruits are also what sailors used to eat on long voyages to prevent scurvy.
Vitamin D: This vitamin helps with the strengthening of bones and teeth. Our bodies are designed to self-generate this vitamin naturally through exposure to sunlight, but obviously that needs to be done in small doses. Modern life has created an environment where more people spend their time indoors, away from the sun. So supplementation becomes important.
Vitamin E: A pretty straight forward vitamin, this one helps with proper blood circulation and clear skin.
Vitamin K: This vitamin is essential for blood-clotting. In order words, if you’re deficient in this vitamin, small cuts or injuries can cause excessive bleeding that can become dangerous.
Folic Acid: We hear people speak about this one as being necessary during pregnancy. And they would be correct! Folic Acid helps to prevent certain complications during childbirth but is important to everyone for proper cell renewal. This one is also known as Folate, or Vitamin B9 (as listed above).
Calcium: Most people should be familiar with this one. Teeth and bones, people! Teeth and bones! Good calcium levels are required to keep those body parts healthy.
Iron: This helps to build muscle tissue naturally and helps with proper health of the blood. As an interesting sidebar, it’s also what makes your blood red through the reflection of light!
Zinc: Immunity and Fertility. I’m a little unfamiliar with this one and haven’t had the opportunity to research it a great deal.
Chromium: This one is near and dear to my heart. Because it helps to control blood sugar levels. Chromium is what helps all the systems of your body to get the energy they need when they need it. Some traditional medicine practitioners will suggest Chromium supplements for Type 1 Diabetics who may have difficulty in maintaining proper levels.
Magnesium: This one helps your body to absorb all the other vitamins and minerals. It also acts as something of a relaxant to muscle tissue and play a role in proper muscle contraction.
Potassium: This mineral helps with the proper hydration of your body and helps to control blood pressure.
There are many others of course, but I’ve tried to cover off the main vitamins and minerals required for a proper diet. We get most of what we need by eating regularly and including a variety of healthy foods. A lot of people take a daily multi-vitamin, which is fine. But unless you are experiencing symptoms or unexplained illnesses, there shouldn’t be a need to actively try and take added amounts of anything. Your medical practitioner should be able to advise you if further supplementation is required. For example, patients who are recommended to take Folic Acid and Iron during pregnancy.
Obviously, all of this is extremely important; not only for proper health and fitness, which is important to me, but to help with Type 1 Diabetes as well. Taking a daily multivitamin can help to ensure that your body gets everything it needs, in combination with carbohydrates, lean proteins and fibre. My wife Laura originally gave me the idea for the post I wrote in 2019 when she asked about B-vitamins. Every time I re-post this material, I think of her. The credit for this post is all her! ☯️
Relationships and understanding require effort on both sides of the equation and this is something that many often don’t understand. As an example, I have a friend who seems to think he’s the absolute authority within his home and that his spouse should just go along and amend her lifestyle and choices to suit his. The problem with this is that relationships require compromise and while one could argue that the person who may not be keeping up with the other is the one who needs to compromise, that flow has to go both ways in order for a relationship to work. And to be clear, this applies to ANY relationship, not just romantic ones.
Throughout the course of my life, I’be been in many friendships, relationships and associations with people and it continues to amaze me how those relationships have often ended up one-sided. And I don’t mean that it was all them; some of it was absolutely me. I do have SOME ability to blame Diabetes in this mix, since my condition was very poorly treated during my teens when friendships were developed that should have blossomed into adulthood. But otherwise, selfishness and poor choices have led to the loss of some of the best friendships and relationships I’ve ever had.
That being said and before I fall too far down the rabbit hole, it’s important to remember that compromise can only get you so far. At the end of the day, one must recognize that there are aspects of your life that you should never compromise or abandon, simply because someone else is asking you to. Some of the relationships I’ve been in have been abusive and to the point where I damaged my health and happiness in order to prevent causing waves. But of there are people in your life who are forcing you to do this, you’re likely better off without them.
I’ve written about this before but I recently read one of those online “AITA” posts about someone with an eating disorder and how their chosen partner just wouldn’t understand when their need to eat kicked in. This reminded me of these aspects and I decided to list them out, once again. Here we go:
Your Sleep
Sleep is a necessary requirement of life. A person can’t go without sleep and if one were to try, they would quite literally die. I could go into all the little details about what tiredness, fatigue and exhaustion can cause but that’s not what this post is about. The bottom line is that although we all love the concept of getting 8 hours of sleep in a night, there are a lot of reasons why someone may be unable to do so and may require rest outside of that. As a Type-1 Diabetic, my system usually responds to fluctuating blood sugars by having me get tired. This tiredness is generally eased by grabbing a quick nap; something that can be difficult if there are household responsibilities that are timely or there are children to help care for. But it should never be ignore simply because someone else dislikes it.
When I lived back home, I used to do some pretty erratic shift work that saw me exhausted and sleeping at strange hours, including at around 6 pm after I’d had some dinner. I’d always have this one wretched friend who’d come knock at my window (I was still living with my parents) until he’d wake me up. When I’d ask him what he wanted, he’d essentially peer-pressure me into leaving the house to go hang out, despite my explaining that I had worked and was tired. His reasoning was that I could always sleep later, since it was early in the evening. No, no I can’t asshole! Shift work doesn’t allow it.
My ex-wife used to be this way, as well. Any time I’d get home from working an overnight, she’d have just woken up and wold be raring to go for the day where all I’d want to do is crawl into my bed. She’d get angry with me for not staying up, despite logically knowing that I had been up throughout the entire night. Toxic. The bottom line and the takeaway here is that you should never sacrifice your need for rest, regardless of the time or what other people may say about it. Especially as a Type-1 Diabetic and knowing that all things affect my blood sugars, I shudder to think of all the damage I caused my self during the times I put off my own exhaustion in favour of others. OR how dangerous it might have been during times I drove or did activities I likely should have, during this fatigue. No more…
2. Your Hunger
If I have to explain why this one is important, y’all really haven’t been reading my stuff! Even if I wasn’t Type-1 Diabetic, it stands to reason that eating is an integral part of staying alive. Much like sleep, you can TRY to go without it but you’ll ultimately lose that battle right around the time you lose your life. In fact, if you try to stop eating, this constitutes an eating disorder, which is what prompted the writing of this post. The “AITA” article I read was about a person who had suffered an eating disorder and was in recovery. As part of their recovery, they had a requirement to eat immediately when they felt hungry, otherwise they could potentially relapse and go days without food.
This person was at a family dinner with their partner and at about 5:30 pm they started to feel hungry, so in keeping with their recovery, they ate a granola bar. Dinner was at 6:30 and they still ate normally and all was well until the couple left and the partner got angry because they considered it a disrespect to have eaten a snack in front of the family an hour before dinner. The couple broke up after the partner refused to acknowledge the person’ eating disorder and recovery and tried to claim that relationships are about compromise. The issue at hand here, is that one should never compromise on their need for food.
I totally understand that under very normal circumstances, waiting an added hour for dinner isn’t the end of the world and that growling stomach might even make for some interesting conversation and a few laughs. But in my world, even at a formal dinner, if I feel that my blood sugars are starting to drop, something is getting shovelled dow my gullet whether the hosts like it or not! Proper food and nutrition is also an integral part of your health and your health should also never be compromised, which brings me to m y third point…
3. Your Health
I have so much to say on this aspect that I would almost need a separate post JUST to explain… Your health actually contains and encompasses the other two points, which is why I saved it for last. For someone with Type-1 Diabetes, taking proper care of your health and managing your overall condition is really the only way to survive until you reach your golden years. But not everyone is always on board with this. Letting someone know that you have dietary restrictions, food requirements or any other conditions that require one to take certain steps will often fall on deaf ears. It’s a delicate balance of trying to make others understand, mixed with the fact that you don’t owe anyone an explanation as it relates to your health.
A good example I have is a kids’ birthday party I brought my oldest to, last year. The party was slated to start at about 4:30 and although I assumed there would be snacks and cake for the kids (it WAS a birthday party, after all) I didn’t want to assume that any adults would be fed, as well. So, I had some dinner before heading over. Setting aside for the moment that I appeared to be one of the only adults who stayed with their kids, the family was all smiles and friendly demeanour. That is, until the food came out. They had ordered pizza for EVERYONE, adults included. While this is an extremely nice gesture, I had already eaten and pizza is one of those really difficult foods to bolus for, especially after I had already eaten.
I made a point of explaining that I was grateful for the offer but couldn’t partake. I even included the fact I had Diabetes. Although they “kind of” said they understood, I could see that they really didn’t. It got worse when the cake came out and everyone was having a piece and I declined on the basis that since I wasn’t home, I didn’t want to upset my blood sugars. It was at that point that I could tell the hosts were experiencing what I can only assume was offence. I get it, I mean it is a birthday party and one of the people there is refusing all food and cake. But sometimes people need to understand that it isn’t about politeness and there may be an actual health component to it.
The bottom line, and I should get to it before I stretch this post another several pages, is that compromise is all well and good, but not at the cost of your health and well-being. You should never compromise your health or need to explain when you’re tired or hungry. One’s well-being is difficult enough to manage without having to justify or explain at ever step. Taking care of yourself is the first priority. And as I often say, even if you’re one of those folks who are always trying to help others, it’s very difficult to help others if you haven’t helped yourself, first. Food for thought…☯️
Happy Turkey-Day! I have to be honest, I spent my entire childhood and even the majority of my adult life having no fuckin’ idea WHY Canada celebrates thanksgiving. I mean, I get why the United States does it; it’s part of their history and an integral part of their story as to how they became a country (although not the greatest story, depending on who you talk to. But I didn’t think we had anything like that here in Canada. All throughout my childhood, I enjoyed the benefit of getting a day off from school on Thanksgiving without ever really knowing the reason behind it. And believe it or not, I would come to realize the reason for this holiday from the most unlikely source…
Believe it or not, I learned of the origins of Canadian Thanksgiving from the sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. In a particular episode, Robin Scherbatsky, played by Canadian-born actress Cobie Smulders, explains that Canadian Thanksgiving is the day of celebration of a explorer Martin Frobisher’s attempt at locating the Northwest Passage. Ironically, I’ve heard of this Northwest Passage throughout most of my life. This Frobisher character, not so much. Anyway, he apparently celebrated and have thanks for the first time on their ship in 1578 and the existing government decided in 1859 to celebrate it as a holiday.
Who knew that despite the comedic nature of the scene, it was based on actual information? Anyway, I hope y’all are having a good weekend and enjoying the extra day off from work. It’s been a nice weekend of spending time with my wife and toddler, Alexander. This afternoon, we’ll be travelling to grab my first-born son, Nathan, from his grandmother with whom he’s spent the whole weekend with. As much as I love my son, I have to admit that it’s been a quieter weekend. But I’m very much looking forward to having him back. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! ☯️
The Blogging Buddhist 