Category: Opinion

Not Just For The Movies…

I don’t generally tend to comment on things, even when it relates to something specific that I have some knowledge about. There’s never been any real value in doing so, since it usually just results in an online argument with someone far less knowledgeable who’s always willing to actively pick a fight with another person from behind the relative safety of their laptop screen. Plus, when someone believes something, it’s usually very difficult to convince them otherwise.

I don’t often get negative comments on my blog posts but everything before now and again I’ll get someone on their soap box who seems intent on picking a fight. A notable example was a few years ago when I wrote a post about proteins and the consumption of meat, only to have some die-hard vegetarian basically denigrate the entire post, accuse me of following pseudo-science and claiming I was spreading false information. In case any one of you were wondering, this is one of the driving reasons why I always include a disclaimer that I’m not a doctor in any of my health or quasi-medical posts. Bu8t I digress…

The point behind bringing this up is because I follow a number of pages online dedicated to martial arts and more specifically, karate. And it absolutely kills me when I read the number of inaccuracy’s comments made by individuals who have likely never even studied martial arts. By virtue of this and through this lens, I’d like to provide my list of most common misconceptions surrounding karate that I’ve noted over the decades.

  1. That’s a waste of time because you’d never do that in a real fight.
    I have a real problem with this kind of statement. While I can’t speak for every style, as I haven’t studied every style, nothing is wasted in karate. Every stance, every move, every strike and every technique is one piece of a significantly larger, overall puzzle that creates the muscle memory required to effectively defend yourself, should the need arise. When you see someone perform a kick straight up above their heads, the intention shouldn’t be to think “when would you ever kick someone like that?” Instead, you should consider that if the practitioner stretches and trains to kick perfectly at that height and level, it will be scores easier and more effective to perform the kick at a normal level. As I mentioned, nothing is wasted. Even if it only looks pretty and you may not use that specific technique in actual combat, it still serves a training and development purpose.
  2. Fights can go on indefinitely.
    Hmm, that a big fuckin’ no… Look, I’m a big fan of martial arts movies (normally) and I enjoy watching them as much as the next guy but real talk, here. That big fight climax at the end of the movie where the two fighters go head to head for 30 minutes or more without stopping is categorically impossible. Anyone who has ever been in a real fight will tell you that the average run time for a real fight is about two or three minutes. And karate is no exception. The amount of energy and effort it takes not only to deliver effective strikes but to block incoming attacks will have your lungs seize and your muscles go lactic after a number of minutes. Setting aside for a moment that these fight portrayals include either of the fighters taking several strikes to the head and body and yet they seem to keep fighting without interruption.
  3. Karate Doesn’t Work In Real Life/That Only Works in the Movies.
    I saved what is argumentatively not the best but the most important, for last. I’ve been fortunate to have never been severely injured during the course of my life but I have to admit that I’ve used karate A LOT! Either in the context of defending myself personally, defending others or in the course of my quasi-lengthy policing career, karate has saved my bacon (please hold all “pig” jokes) on more occasions than I can count. I’ve most often heard the argument that karate can’t stack up against other forms of “sport” combat like MMA. While I’ve never been a big fan of MMA, I’ve held a respect for it, as I would never see myself willingly sacrificing my body in that way. However, the concept of two willing participants rolling around and sweating on each other in biker shorts doesn’t quite appeal to me and doesn’t quite apply in the same self-defence context as karate would. But I digress… The bottom line is simply this: While form, karate and typically repetitive techniques may seem soft and ineffective and while one may not understand the dynamics of muscle memory and why it would help and certainly apply in a real-world context, I can confirm without any shadow of a doubt, that karate does in fact work as a martial art and a self-defence tool. I have my continued existence as proof.

That’s it for now, folks. A bit lengthy and a bit of a soap box post, but such is the way of it sometimes. The important thing to remember is not to believe everything you see in the movies but also don’t assume that martial arts doesn’t work. If anyone needs any further proof, I’m always looking for someone to train with. I’d be more than happy to share my knowledge. ☯️

The Sedentary Seduction…

It’s no secret that the pandemic changed the world in a very measurable and noticeable way. Between distancing rules, effects on peoples’ jobs and finances and the fact that everyone STILL hasn’t recovered rom everything just goes to show how much of an impact COVID-19 has had on the world. One of the most interesting results of the pandemic is remote work. All of sudden, people had to work from home for the first time. And for the most part, it was mostly positive. Peoples’ productivity increased (in most cases), absenteeism lowered and it was realized that a significant portion of the working world could still perform their jobs from the comfort of their homes with very little issue. Oh, there are plenty of employers who fought this and imposed conditions and restrictions, most with very little success. And to be clear, there are obviously some jobs that can’t be done remotely.

From my perspective, working from home is problematic at best. My bloody ADHD makes it extremely difficult to focus at the best of times but trying to do it from home is even worse. I’ll be working on something work related then think “I should start a load of laundry while I’m here…” or grab some lunch in my kitchen and think “Maybe I should get these dishes done while I’m at it…” And before you know it, I’m burning through the work day on stuff that should be done after hours. Another issue is my son. I’m blessed with a red-headed 5-year old son who, once he realizes that I’m actually home, clings to my hip, making it difficult to properly sit through meetings or get any measurable work done. I absolutely adore my son but the added stress of trying to get work done as opposed to playing with him and accepting his hugs makes going into the office important. Plus, working from a small laptop screen as opposed to two large, tandem screens isn’t ideal.

About two weeks ago, I developed a bit of problematic cough. Typically this wouldn’t be a concern. After all, I tend to get sick at the drop of a hat, given I have Type-1 Diabetes. It’s not unusual during the winter months for me to catch a cold and/or get sick at least three or four times. But after a number of days and realizing the cough wasn’t subsiding, I started to realize it may be something more. Last year around this time, I developed a lung infection that progressed to bronchitis. A round of steroids, antibiotics and using an inhaler for the first time in my life, coupled with about two months of lost time hacking and throwing up FROM my lungs (yes, you read that right). One can’t throw up directly from the lungs, of course, since they’re not set up to expel like the stomach. But coughing hard enough can trigger vomiting.

How does this relate to the remote work aspect? I promise I’m getting there… For almost two weeks now, I’ve been mostly working from home. It couldn’t be avoided, as most office staff don’t appreciate their boss hacking and coughing all over the bloody place. And whether I have something contagious or not, it still doesn’t alleviate the anxiety of having someone ill within one’s midsts. So, with the inclusion of a second large screen at home, I’ve been on meds and recovering while working remotely. And I’ve come to realize that the modern world basically allows for one to live entirely from the comfort of one’s home without ever having to step foot outside. I’m not saying I want that, am into that or enjoy that but it’s a realization nonetheless.

Need groceries? Order them online and have them delivered? Prescriptions? Same thing; most modern pharmacies have a delivery service. Anything you could possibly want to purchase can be bought online and delivered right to one’s door. Even one’s banking and finances can be accomplished online. Of course, this brings a significant amount of risk that is lessened by performing these tasks in person. Being delivered the wrong goods, being incorrectly charged, being defrauded by online scammers… The list goes on. But as long as your careful and do things right, one could potentially live out their days from the comfort of their home without ever having to leave. Provided your job allows you to work remotely on a permanent basis.

There is a certain allure to this concept and some of the positives could almost make it worth it. As long as there are no outlying factors at play, you could save significant cost by not owning a vehicle, which requires gas, insurance and registration overhead. Grocery shopping becomes about what you need instead of walking the aisles and grabbing impulse buys that you didn’t go in for. The same can be said for any retail location or business you may walk into. However, one could argue that home utility costs may be a bit higher, since you are running power and utilities throughout the work day instead of being in an office. I’m not sure which of those options would cost more on a month-to-month basis, but it’s a consideration.

Now, I’m not saying this is what I want to do. My specific job wouldn’t allow me to work remotely on an indefinite basis anyway. All I’m saying is that for one who is well-positioned to do so, one could enjoy their years from the comfort of their home without ever having to leave. With everything purchased online and delivered, one could find themselves in a position where they wouldn’t have to leave unless they wanted to. And from a very small, silent corner of my brain, the concept is appealing. And who knows? By the time I retire, that just might be how I spend my final years. Just chilling inside my home, binge-watching Star Trek movies and smoking cogars in my backyard. Time will certainly tell… ☯️

Remembering to Appreciate…

Sometimes it’s easy to take things for granted. Even when they’re essentially life saving or life maintaining. I was diagnosed with type-1 Diabetes when I was 4 years old. That means I’ve been managing and living with this condition for over 40 years! I’d say time flies when you’re having fun but very little of it has been fun. I remember as a child, all of my Diabetes therapy was tedious, annoying and usually got in my way. Kids are usually busy and have things to do, so having to stop several times a day to test my blood or treat a low was annoying to me.

I didn’t understand or realize how important those steps were as a child. Or how very fortunate I was that there was even a therapy that could allow me to live with my condition. Not everyone is so lucky. These days, I’m often blown away by how far I’ve come, considering many if not most people with my condition tend to deteriorate after a few decades and often end up with organ failure, amputations and blindness. Granted, a lot of my good fortune comes from the effort I’ve put into my self care. This includes proper nutrition and fitness habits, the latter of which I admit I haven’t done so well with in recent months.

I saw a post a few days ago about the first use of insulin on patients, which occurred in January of 1922 in Toronto. I’ve often written about things like the fact I wouldn’t survive a zombie apocalypse because once I’d run out of insulin, it would be game over. Ten days is the basic standard, without any insulin therapy. Once you’ve reached that point, you generally slip into a coma and die shortly thereafter. But reading about how Frederick Banting visited a coma ward and injected a young, comatose patient who awoke about a day later and whose blood sugars started to regulate, reminded me of just how fortunate I am indeed.

Considering that until the 1920’s, Type-1 Diabetes was effectively a death sentence for children, it was a discovery that changed the world. It was made all the better with the fact that they sold the patent for a dollar so that the whole world would have access to insulin. I can’t imagine how things would be different if they took the monetary approach and sought to get rich off their discovery instead. In a series of unlikely events that took place decades before I was born, my health and longevity was secured by individuals I’ve never met and will never get to thank.

That’s why I consider it so important to be grateful for the options I have. If I had lived in the early 1900’s, I likely would have died. So on the days where it feels like a pain in the ass to test my blood, take medication or change up a glucose sensor, I remind myself that while it would be far better for my life if I was Diabetic at all, these things are keeping me alive and healthy. And it’s impossible to put a price on that. Food for thought… ☯️

The Most Unlikely Discrimination…

Among some of the worst conditions are the ones that are invisible to the naked eye. The best example is the scenario where someone parks in a handicap spot without any visible, physical handicaps. Despite the driver having a registered handicap placard on their windshield, you’ll always get that one asshole who decides to stick their nose in and try to convince this person they should be packed there. Despite that issue, the person in question may have some underlying condition that the complainer simply doesn’t see. But I may be digressing just a little bit here…

The point is, Type-1 Diabetes is very much or of those conditions. Although there will usually be nothing visible on the surface, there can be a tumultuous storm of symptoms and issues under the surface that simply isn’t visible to anyone watching. True, there are a lot of long-standing, inappropriate jokes about Diabetes, such as an obese person MUST be Diabetic or eating a candy bar will cause it, but on the whole, having Type-1 Diabetes isn’t something you will SEE. But it’s always there and it always creates obstacles.

For the most part, I’ve always operated on the basis of full disclosure. This is especially true with family, friends and employers. After all, the last thing I want someone to do if a Diabetes-related incident occurs, is have someone do something that could harm me or exacerbate the issue further. For example, the most important thing I tell everyone in all circumstances is, if I have a Diabetic incident near them, it’ll always fall under one of two categories. Either I’m conscious, in which case I’ll either treat myself or ask for your help and instruct you on what to do, or I’m unconscious, in which case you shouldn’t try to treat me and should simply call 911 and get medical assistance.

Some people have always claimed that when in doubt, feed the person orange juice or some other fast-acting carb because, even if the issue is high blood sugar, it’s easier for medical staff to bring it down and could potentially save you IF if a low blood sugar incident. Not only is this grossly inaccurate, but if I’ve lost consciousness due to high blood sugar, it’s a guarantee that it’s high enough that anything you fee me may kill. No thank you. I’ll roll that dice all day long. Bearing in mind, this is my preference. Like any other condition, the person who has it should be the one instructing others on what they’d prefer.

That being said, there are certain discriminations that apply to people with Diabetes that others likely aren’t aware of. They range from the simplest and smallest of things to some reasonably life-altering statements and decisions. ON the former, a good example would be someone who brings sweet treats into the office to share with everyone. But when you come around to see what’s there, you get the sympathetic look, followed by “oh, I suppose you shouldn’t be eating these…” as they pull the items out of your reach. That’s pretty presumptuous at the best of times. Practically-speaking, someone with Diabetes isn’t inherently restricted from eating any given foods, so long as they bolus properly for it. That’s the whole point of insulin.

On the heavier side, it can even be someone that would affect a chosen career or path in life. For example, I originally applied to the police force all the way back in 1998. If I had successfully gotten in, I would have a twenty seven year career under my belt. Instead, I was denied at the outset because I checked off a box on the application that asked if I had Diabetes. realistically, it isn’t something I could have hidden or lied about and if I’d been willing to do so, I would have had no business carrying a badge. But there’s no denying that it dealt a serious blow to my self-confidence and self-worth that took effort and years to recover from. The sad part is that I had better physical health and a greater fitness regime than many of the other applicants I joined that night.

It wouldn’t be until 2007 that I would discover that the condition in question had been lifted and my application would be accepted. I chose to apply, ready to face whatever challenges would be laid before me. The part I wasn’t prepared for, was the extended application process that would follow, that contained increased medical testing and examinations. While I can understand the Force’s need to ensure the “I’s” are dotted and the “T’s” are crossed, it took me twice as long to be accepted as any other applicant. I persevered and got in, but my time as an academy cadet was marred with little jabs as well. Between being labeled as sub-par in physical benchmarks, often due to low blood sugar or other illnesses and being denied food in classrooms due to the “rules,” even when I was having lows, they certainly weren’t ready to deal with the prospect of accepting Diabetic candidates.

I’ve often faced that same issue with several employers, where the need to stop and step away for a few moments to treat a low or test blood sugars have been met with responses that it’s against the rules or “if you can’t do the job” statements. It’s never been that I can’t do the job, but sometimes five minutes of compassion can allow an employee to flourish and become one of your most-valued as opposed to feel ignored as though they’re being discriminated against. I’m blessed in that my current employer has a deep understanding of such things. While the working world has improved its duty to accommodate when someone has such difficulties, there’s still a long ways to go.

While I wouldn’t expect certain jobs to accommodate certain disabilities, for example, I would expect someone with no tongue to be a food taster, having an underlying condition or chronic illness doesn’t automatically render one incapable of doing a particular job. There are things you can do to protect yourself and ensure you put yourself in the best situation possible. Open honesty about your condition is always the best policy. While employers aren’t inherently allowed to ask you specifics about health conditions, I’ve never understood why people want to keep such details to themselves. I much prefer open transparency. Not only does it keep everyone on the same page, it could also potentially save your life, if the people around you know what the issue may be.

Another important aspect is open communication from both sides. When applying for jobs, be sure to ask what accommodations can be made for your specific condition. This plays into the previous paragraph. While you may not HAVE to provide specifics about your condition, giving a potential employer some high-level information can help them be honest and forthcoming about what accommodations may be available, as well. For example, asking “what accommodation can you make if I need to step away from my till for ten minutes in the event of low blood sugar?” Could mean the difference between finding a positive place for you to hang your hat or moving on to the next potential career option.

All of this information is based on the premise that little of what’s happening is intentional. If you find yourself in the midst of a situation where you feel someone may be straight up discriminating against BECAUSE of a medical condition, you may have bigger problems to address. But that’s for another post. For now, suffice it to say that there’s plenty you can do to protect yourself. Even though you shouldn’t HAVE to. But such is the world we live in. A little effort can go a long way and sometimes you just gotta pick your battles. Just always ensure you’re fighting on your side. Food for thought… ☯️

Resolutions Aren’t Meant For Once A Year…

Well, here it is, folks! The last day 0f 2024. As my day dwindles on, I’m found thinking back on the past year and the things I’ve experienced, the things I’ve accomplished and the things I’ve wished for. I’ve had some happy times, some less than happy times and times when I wondered what it was actually all about. For most people, the New Year holiday represents a new start, a fresh beginning and a time to make resolutions for a better year. For me, it’s just another Wednesday. And here’s why…

When New Year’s Day hits, it’s usually the time when most people decide on resolutions to change the overall tone of their lives. These resolutions come in many forms. While some of the most common ones include things like more exercise, dieting or cutting out vices like alcohol or gambling, some can be on the more wholesome side, like reading more books, spending more time outdoors or doing at least one new thing every week. While all of this is totally well and good, the statistical majority of people who enter into a New Year’s resolution will typically give up and/or falter in their resolution within a few months. If they last that long.

This begs the question: why bother? This failure is a known fact to most people and yet, most people will still start the New Year off with, “This year, I will…” While it may sound strange coming from me, being the guy who usually promotes having goals and achieving them, I can’t help but think that perhaps a single day of the year set out as a holiday is NOT the best time to be making commitments to something else. And one shouldn’t wait UNTIL New Year’s to make said commitment. I’ve lost count of how many people I’ve heard say things like “oh, I’ll cut down on sweets in the New Year,” or “I’ll start getting fit in January as my New Year’s resolution.”

There are a lot of reasons why people give up or quit their resolutions within a few months. One reason is that the holidays are probably the worst time for the year for people over-eating, drinking and lounging around watching Christmas movies and doing fuck all. It’s kind of hard to jump from that and go into a new diet or try to get yourself moving in any efficient way. Another reason, especially if your resolutions is fitness-oriented, is that it’s hard to hit the ground running in January, considering it’s usually followed by the coldest months of the year (at least here in Canada). The human body is at its lowest energy point and focusing solely on staying dry and warm. Sometimes, the drive to keep pushing physically just isn’t there.

Lastly, many people will drop their resolutions because they simply aren’t seeing results. The inherent problem with this is that fitness and health is an ongoing journey, not a destination. If your goal is to increase muscle or lose weight, it can take months or even years to achieve what you’re seeking. We live in a world of immediate gratification and most people don’t like to wait for things. So by March or April, people can become disillusioned with their goals and simply give up. Viewed through that lens, those folks should be grateful they don’t have Type-1 Diabetes; that shit never ends.

My point is, don’t wait until New Year’s to start improving upon yourself. Start today. The New Year is nothing. It’s not a “fresh” start. It isn’t the beginning of something new. It’s just another day. Simply another date on the calendar. Your life starts every day. THAT’s where your resolution begins. Not on a holiday, not as a special occasion but as a conscious decision to make the change. After all, life is like a book. We all know how the story begins and how it ends. It’s up to you how the chapters in between get written. Food for thought… Happy New Year. ☯️

Your Opinion Of Me Is None of My Business…

I saw something online recently that I really wish I had saved at the time, because it makes it really hard to shared a link or explain where I found something without doing so. But given how flighty I am at the best of times, sprinkled with a fine dust of ADHD and the occasional finger of whiskey thrown into the mix, it’s a surprise that I can write coherently at all. But yet here we are. The point is, I recently read a post somewhere that may or may not have been quoted from some celebrity, that read something to the tune of “what other people say about me is none of my business.”

This struck a pretty deep chord with me. Most of us spend so much time worrying about what other people may say or think about us, almost to the point where it becomes debilitating. Let’s look at a small example. When you’re about to leave the house in the morning to go run errands, the odds are good that you’ll grab a shower, put on deodorant, brush your hair and dress appropriately, not only to your local’S social standard but appropriate to the weather. While some of this makes sense for hygiene reasons, a lot of it is driven by societal expectations and how we feel people may perceive us.

We’re not just guilty of the phenomenon itself but also of encouraging it. Without even considering it, how many times have you been at a large retail location and seen someone and thought “holy fuck, they left the house that way???” while we tend to believe our thoughts are our own and are private, all it takes is a sideways glance or disgusted look to let that person know what those “private” thoughts may be. For the most part, this isn’t something we can prevent; we’re only human and we can guard our thoughts only so far. Although minding our thoughts is an important step in preventing further suffering on our own part. Jus’ sayin’…

The bigger challenge comes from letting go of what OTHERS may think or say about you. If you get word that one of your colleagues thinks you’re an absolute asshole, it’s likely to elicit an emotional response. The key takeaway is to ask oneself, does it really matter? What this other person thinks or says about you is not a reflection on who you are and shouldn’t alter how you view yourself. They’re free to have their own views and thoughts without it necessarily affecting you. Think, “I can only control my words, not how you interpret them” but in reverse.

What others’ opinion of you may be is none of your business. It won’t change your life, your situation and it shouldn’t affect your overall goals. And putting such things out of your mind is an important step towards eliminating self-suffering and being a happier, more fulfilled person. Food for thought… ☯️

Can Closure Be Too Little, Too Late?

What is closure? In the context I’ll be using it, closure refers to gaining a sense of peace, understanding and emotional release that comes from gaining understanding about certain events in our lives. For example, people will often get closure from having that after-breakup conversation with someone they were involved with. That’s only one example but it’s a pretty common one and serves to illustrate the point I’m getting at for today’s post. It stands to reason that closure can come in the most interesting ways at the most unexpected time.

Just a few short years ago, I had the opportunity to connect with someone from my past where I was able to discuss how much of a dick I was through my teen years. It would be decades before I would come to realize that many of the symptoms caused by Type-1 Diabetes was the root cause of most of the isues I caused for myself in my teens. This isn’t and shouldn’t be an all-encompassing excuse of course but it did lend itself to how I was almost universally in a bad mood and treated others poorly. I cost myself several friendships and relationships during my youth because I couldn’t reconcile my disease with proper management. But I’m glad I got closure on some of those issues and the people I’ve spoken to were gracious enough to show some undertanding.

From my side of things, there’s much closure I often feel I’m owed by many individuals who have wronged me over the years. In 2018, my career and my life took a left turn. The only thing worse than having someone wrong you in life, is having someone accuse you of something that puts your entire life in jeopardy. This is what happened to me, back in 2018. I found myself in an unfortunate set of circumstances that I would have never imagined being in. I won’t get into all the gritty details in this post but it did lead me to change the entire course of my life, my career and my view on others and how I’m treated by them. Let’s just say that all things considered, life is pretty good right now and I can’t exactly complain, but there’s a stain on my soul that may never heal as a result of what some others have done to me.

While I really want to tell the story and explain how I came about getting some closure on this issue, for reasons that should be understandable, I really shouldn’t be naming people or referring to specific situations. Not all of this is just MY story to tell. And it would be wrong of me to tell the part that isn’t mine. So I’ll stick to what I can say. Recently, I was out at a work event with everyone from the organization that I work at. It was a pretty good event and it included a tour for the entire staff of the venue we were in. As we were walking the site, we came around a corner that had a security guard kiosk and imagine my surprise at seeing one of the involved parties in the events of 2018 that altered my life forever.

I recognized him immediately, although I wasn’t very surprised at the fact that he didn’t recognize me. After all, it had been half a decade and I had a full face of facial hair whereas I would have been clean shaven back when he knew me. Once the group had cleared, I walked up and greeted him. He was taken aback when he realized who I was. The conversation was congenial enough, as we discussed where we were both explained where we were currently working and what had been happening in our respective lives since the events of 2018. It was a great conversation and I even got to introduce him to my current boss, given that the individual in question was indirectly my boss in my previous career.

As my group moved on to other sections of the site, he was peaking to others who weren’t part of my group, so I moved on. When the day was over and all my staff were leaving the site, I decided I wanted to seek out the individual so that I could shake his hand and say goodbye. When I found him doing his rounds, something happened that I wouldn’t have, and wasn’t expecting. He brought up the past and admitted that I got a raw deal. He explained that he felt I never should have had the accusations made against me and that the organization didn’t deal with it the way they could have. He told me that he always remembered and appreciated the way I came in to work my modified assignments with such enthusiasm and professionalism, there were days when he didn’t believe I was someone dealing with the situation I was in. He felt that other members should have followed my example.

These revelations hit me like a ton of bricks. While I agreed with everything he said, it shocked me to my core to hear him say it. Until that moment, no one from my previous career had admitted that I was treated badly or that the events in question shouldn’t have happened. I know that a lot of people would say that the words were too little, too late. That those things should have been brought up at the time in an effort to mitigate the damage caused to my life and my career. But for some reason, hearing this from him lifted a weight off my shoulders that I had become so accustomed to that I didn’t even know it was there. It was a very special kind of closure that I didn’t know I needed. And for that, I will be forever grateful to him.

Don’t be afraid to seek out that closure. Some of the bad periods of your life could be easily reconciled if you’re willing to seek the answer. Sometimes this might mean saying you’re sorry. Sometimes, it may simply mean giving others the opportunity to say they’re sorry. In any event, closure can be good. It shouldn’t be sold short. After all, whatever can be done to reduce the suffering in one’s life is good, right? Food for thought… ☯️

Another Year, Another Moustache…

So, yet another year of raising funds for prostate cancer through Movember. Some readers may have noted that I posted about this a few weeks in advance by providing instructions on how folks could donate to this very, very good cause. For reference or for those who haven’t seen the post, you can read it here. I usually choose the same modest goal of $500 every year. The first couple of years were pretty sweet, with generous folks ensuring that we reached that goal and on one year, we even knocked it out of the park. This year, not so much…

I was a little surprised this year at the lack of participation and interest, even from those who expressed interest. I usually have a team that not only donates but actively participates in growing out their ‘staches as part of the fun. But this year was pretty lackluster. I’m disappointed to see that not only was everyone’s participation was piss-poor this year, but with the organization and fundraising attempts on my part, no one really got involved on it with me. As a result, this will likely be the last year that I fundraise for Movember and will likely just make my own individual donation. There’s nothing worse than putting in the time and effort to try and fundraise as a group, only to have none of the group get involved as well. Live and learn.

On the positive side, since I shouldn’t spend the entire whining like a little bitch, we did raise $350 for prostate cancer. We may not have reached the goal we set, but it’s still $350 more than would have otherwise been raised, so that’s a positive. I generally tend to expect quite a bit from myself and I unfortunately forget that I shouldn’t expect THAT much from everyone else. It’s kind of unfortunate given that I frequently have people who fundraise for all kinds of random bullshit that doesn’t really qualify as a good cause, or people who start a GoFund me page because they want a new iPhone or something. But i digress… I did say I shouldn’t be whining like a bitch. The bottom line is we raised money and I grew an absolute resplendent beard. It’s coming off today, and if it didn’t itch so fuckin’ bad, I’d likely keep it. But until next year, I’ll keep my face clean. ☯️

Expectations vs Reality

There are a lot of things that happen behind the scenes for someone with Type-1 Diabetes that the average person isn’t aware of. Much like seeing someone park in a handicap spot but yet walk with simple ease, an illness or disability isn’t always obvious to the naked eye. But without standing too high on my soapbox, my point is that there are a number of things that people tend to take for granted that almost seem like a rare treat to someone with Type-1 Diabetes. In this post, I’m going to examine the top ones that are important to me.

A Naked Shower
I should probably clarify that I’m naked for every shower that I take. This isn’t a high school changing room; I don’t shower in my clothes. That’s a story for another day. But what I mean is, having the ability to take a shower without needing to protect infusion sites or adhesive pads. Generally speaking, my insulin pump’s infusion sets are changed out every three days. This is because after three days, insulin begins to crystallize on the plastic based tubing and parts of the infusion set. This can result in an inaccurate delivery of insulin.

My continuous glucose monitor sensor gets changed out once a week. This is mainly because the interstitial fluid and the wound heals up enough that reading becomes difficult. In any event, with one of my cyborg parts replaced every three days and the other replaced every seven days, it’s usually an interesting challenge showering, since some of the adhesive patches will dry up and peel after a hot shower. The result is I usually have to maneuver and cover the injections sites and their coverings so that they get wet as little as possible. You ever try taking a normal shower while trying to keep any one area of your body dry? Not so easy…

Once in a while, an opportunity comes up where both insertions are due for replacement around roughly the same time. On those rare occasions, I get to take a nice, hot shower without any concern about protecting anything on the abdomen. I can effectively shower withy abandon, which one wouldn’t think is a big deal but when you can never do it, having the chance to just let the hot water wash over without concern is a definite treat that the average person takes for granted.

A Decent Night’s Sleep
First and foremost, I need to point out that proper sleep is always an issue for someone with Type-1 Diabetes, whether you wear a pump or not. Between fluctuating blood sugars, fluctuating blood pressure, circulatory issues that cause your arms and legs to go numb and restless as you sleep… The list goes on. Tack on my PTSD and the frequent repetitive nightmares and you’ve got a recipe for shitty nights. I have, on occasion, had the opportunity of sleep well throughout an entire night but these instances have almost always included some exterior assistance, like melatonin or a few fingers of whiskey.

Wearing an insulin pump presents its own unique set of challenges during sleep. While I always make a point to wear shorts or pyjama pants that have pockets, the pump will often slide out of the pocket during the night as I roll over. What’s worse is if I end up on TOP of the pump. This can be uncomfortable and even painful, especially if I roll over and the pump ends up in my tender bits. Y’all know what I’m referring to. Trying to remain perfectly still during sleep is effectively impossible, which means that under all circumstances, my pump will contribute to waking me up repeatedly throughout the night. So if you’re someone who gets a full night’s sleep, don’t take it for granted.

Eating With Abandon
Before the concept of pump technology and carb counting were brought to my attention, one of my favourite things was eating at a Chinese buffet. I’m one of those fuckers who loves the concept of the fried foods and flavoured sauces and dips that one can only enjoy through Asian cuisine. Nowadays, being mindful not only of what I eat but in what amounts can be challenging at best. Even when I read food labels and calculate based on the amount of carbohydrates they indicate, I hit some obstacles with lows, highs and miscalculations.

Eating out at a restaurant is usually the most challenging, because asking a server how grams of carbohydrates are in the meal you’re planning to order can be troublesome. While restaurant staff are generally expected to have some knowledge about the meals they serve, one must be realistic in just how deep that knowledge goes. It’s different if you’re having something defined, like a fast food burger, where you can usually check their website and get comprehensive nutritional information. But then when you incorporate something loose, like fries, rice or mashed potatoes, calculating the proper amount of carbohydrates and delivering the right amount of insulin is tough. What’s even tougher is if you estimate, then you can’t finish what you’ve bloused for.

Buffets are now an absolute waste of money for me, considering I can’t eat with abandon and have to moderate my portions and calculate insulin delivery. Even protein-based dishes are packed with carbohydrates at Asian buffets, considering everything is usually battered. While pumpkin therapy allows me to live easier with my meal choices (eating a slice of cake in my teens would have been completely out of the question), having the ability to eat whatever one wants whenever one wants without worrying about the consequences is definitively something any non-Diabetic shouldn’t take for granted.

SO, as you can see, there are many things that the average, every day person takes for granted that Type-1 Diabetics are dealing with behind the scenes. And this isn’t an all-inclusive list. People rarely see those aspects and simply assume that as long as we avoid sugar and take our insulin, the ship stays on course. Nothing could be farther from the truth. So if you have the ability to sleep properly, shower with abandon and relax and eat at your leisure, take the time to recognize how blessed you are. While I will always acknowledge that things could be much worse for me, all the little things y’all take for granted are often the things that any other person yearns for. Food for thought… ☯️

The Unbalanced Scales of Retail…

It starts out as pretty much the way every shopping errand does… I slowly walk the aisles, scanning for items I need and watching the items I could potentially want. With a significant number of ongoing and increasing shopping concerns, such as inflation and grocery affordability, the “wants” usually go untouched. But for the most part, the “needs” make their way into my basket as I slowly shuffle along. In the interest of navigating the public, a pair of noise-cancelling headphones with some soft, meditative music sit atop my head. While cursed with an unfortunate contestant state of hyper-vigilance, the noise blocking gives my PTSD-riddled brain a much needed respite from the public as I do I what I have to do.

I guess I should clarify that, despite my loud, outgoing voice, I am inherently an introvert, preferring to use self-checkouts and avoid unnecessary interactions with random strangers for no purpose. While this has often made me seem anti-social other some, I prefer to think of myself as socially independent; not requiring the interaction with others to get through my daily grind all while not avoiding it when it’s necessary or socially warranted. For these reasons and many others, I almost always use a self-checkout option if I can. But the retail world is complex and convoluted, often differing from one location to the next. Here are a few examples of how this has applied in recent weeks.

I stopped in at a particular retail location to purchase my weekly lottery ticket. For obvious reasons, I won’t name these businesses since, you know, I prefer not getting sued. But generally speaking, lottery and age-restricted items can’t be purchased through a self-checkout for the obvious reasons. So, I walk up to the till. I was the only customer there and waited several minutes for a cashier to notice and acknowledge my arrival and approach the counter. As opposed to the typical greeting one would expect from a retail person, her first words were to ask me if i would be paying by debit or credit, to which I replied I was. She then proceeded to suggest I use the self-checkout and began walking away from me.

Let’s evaluate this for a moment. I’ve worked in the retail environment. Most staff are already of the opinion that their jobs are in jeopardy’s because of self-checkouts and program automation. Yet, this cashier is trying to ENCOURAGE me to use the self-checkout option. I’d say this is just a “her” thing, but I’ve gotten this response from a few different employees at this location. I clarified that I needed lottery, which resulted in a not-so-subtle exhalation of a sigh and a return to the till, as though I had interrupted her previously scheduled program. But I digress… I got my lottery ticket and went on my way, somewhat taken aback at how I was being thrown towards technology by the very folks who have the most to lose from it. That’s the first side of the coin.

Now let’s look at it from the other side of the coin. Another retail location I visited is one where I typically insist on using their self-checkout given the busy lines and long wait times to be served by a cashier. This would be one of those scenarios where I have my headphones on and don’t want to interact with the world; I just want to pay for my shit and go. On this occasion, I have a number for heavy and bulk items that are cumbersome and inconvenient to try and manually run through the till scanner. I begin looking for the scan gun that should be sitting in its cradle at the top of the till. It isn’t there.

Already a bit flustered, it took me all of ten seconds to realize that none of the scan guns were at ANY of the self-checkout tills. I waved over an employee and pointed out the issue. The response was that he brought over a scan gun but rather than let me use it, he physically scanned all my items himself, despite repeating twice that I wanted to do this myself. He indicated that they couldn’t leave the scan guns at the tills and that he was the only one allowed to use them. I challenged him by asking what the point of a self-checkout was, if I needed a cashier to scan my things for me. He had no response.

It seems like such a small point and certainly not one I’d die on the hill for, but it raises a good point. What the fuck is the point of having self-checkout if a cashier scans all my shit? It seemed like a weird scenario in a frowning market where automation and self-checkout of bien flushed but on the flip side, scenarios where staff who should be more than happy to push for their continued employment, push for it as well. As you may have been able to tell, there’s very little to no point behind today’s post. Sometimes, one just needs to rant. ☯️