Category: Motivation

Unseen Enemies

There can be a lot of obstacles and unseen enemies when one is trying to accomplish any fitness, health or martial arts goals. Some of these that include things like lack of motivation, discouragement, wanting what others have (seeing more advanced students or their progress) and even seeing others discouraging or making fun of people who are trying to better themselves. That last one is particularly bad but as anyone who’s rocked out to the soundtrack of Rocky IV, “it’s you against you; the paradox that drives us all.”

We are our own worst enemy. Sometimes, this is a results of how we’re biologically programmed. As living things, our bodies are designed to preserve energy and be at rest as much as possible. This can often make it difficult to push through, when we need to attend karate classes, do workouts at home or try and find the energy to play with one’s kids. This is aggravated when one has a condition that causes apathy due to blood sugars. I’m not complaining (anymore than usual), jus’ sayin’… But there’s a reason why people always shit like, why put off ’til tomorrow what you could be doing today.

Most people always believe that they have more time and that it doesn’t matter. “Meinh, I’ll get to it tomorrow” or “I’ll start AFTER this weekend…” People rarely stop to consider the damage that’s done while waiting for that better time or the time they lose BECAUSE they wait. We are our own worst enemy, and there are consequences to putting off until later what we can start on, today. A perfect example of this was made clear to me last Saturday; not so much from a fitness standpoint but on a personal level.

A few weeks ago, I made my peace with the fact that I had to start mowing my lawn. Although I enjoy the perks of owning my own home as opposed to renting, I absolutely abhor yard work.That means that things like lawn-mowing, weed removal and all those different things that one needs to get done for the outside of their home, I despise. I rather be writing, doing karate or playing with my kids. Adulthood, am I right? The point is, I had dandelions sprouting and my front lawn looked like shit so I popped in my earbuds, grabbed my lawn mower and got to work.

I only planned to finish the front lawn and call it a day. By the time I finished the front, I decided to start tackling the rear. I managed to get half of the back lawn done before my upper back and shoulder started reminding me of my age. This sucks on many different levels, because I couldn’t plan on when I would get to the second half and my OCD was really going to LOVE seeing half the grass at a different growth level. The following couple of days, one thing after another came up that gave me excuses not to get to it.

The following weekend, we were out as a family, doing our weekly family activity and I planned on getting the lawn done once we got back. But my neighbours were staining our side of a piece of fence they were using as a windbreak for their sitting area. Didn’t seem polite to start mowing some lawn right by their ankles or potentially throwing up grass clipping against freshly stained wood. I opted to wait until later so that the fence’s staining could dry. Are we seeing a pattern of behaviour here? Putting off a needed chore?

That was over a week ago and last weekend I decided it needed to get completed as the back half of the rear lawn was starting to look like a small jungle. The result of my laziness was no small task. As a result of my putting off this chore, my weak-ass electric lawnmower had no chance of cutting through that tall grass. I had to spend over an hour with a whipper-snipper, cutting through it all manually. Then I had to rake and collect all the clipped grass by hand before finally running the mower over the clipped grass to bring everything back into balance.

Several hours work for what would have only been about an hour of lawn-mowing, had I been smart enough to get off my ass and get it done when i should have. My apathy and unwillingness to push through my urge to stay comfortable actually caused me a greater effort once i had no choice. And yes, I’m writing about clipping grass, which isn’t exactly a life-altering thing. But the lesson applies to all things in life. Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can jump on today. Start those fitness goals. Start eating cleaner. Build some goals and start working towards them. Everyone thinks there’ll always be more time; until there isn’t. Food for thought… ☯️

Back On The Old Warhorse…

Well, my first week back to karate after recovering from my rib injury was a great success. And what’s more, I managed to make all three classes without missing a single minute. This is a catch-22, since I feel ridiculously exhausted but satisfied that I attended the full week. I can admit that my ribs and muscles ache but this is to be expected. Mix this with a couple of days’ rain in the Regina area to add some pain in my old joints and it made for a Friday night chock full of relaxation to prepare myself for the week to come.

It was good to be back and the increased temperatures accompanying the coming summer also made the workouts particularly rough. There doesn’t appear to be any A/C in the dojo… (did I SERIOUSLY just type that???) Talk about first-world problems. But I did recognize that two months of basically sitting still and doing nothing seems to have contributed to my overall weight. I could definitely feel the difference. I’ll have some significant work to do over the summer to get myself back into shape. The good news is I found out that our dojo only closes for the month of August, which means I’ll have in-person training all summer.

Short but sweet post today but what can I say? I can’t ramble on for pages and pages every day. ☯️

A Little Reminder Of What’s Important…

Once in a while, I tend to recycle old material I’ve already written about. Kind of can’t help it when you consider that I’ve been blogging for about four years at this point. But once in a while, it’s important for any of us to remember what’s important in life. And this brings to mind a story i read when I was in college, way back in the 1990’s. I kept a paper copy of this story as it inspired me back then, almost as much as it does now. Some of you may have heard this story before, but here it is:

A professor stood in front of his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar slightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous YES.

The professor then produced two bottles of beer from under the table and poured their entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things such as family, your children, your health, your friends and your favourite passions. And if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else, the small stuff. If you were to put the sand into the jar first, there would be no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.”

It’s important to pay attention to the things in your life that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your spouse and children. Visit with your parents. Take time for your health. Treat yourself to dinner. Play another 18 holes.

Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the professor’s students raiser her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled and said, “I’m glad you asked that. The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of beer with friends or family.” ☯️

Weekend Family Chronicles, Volume 3.

It was quite a busy weekend for my little baby Buddhas and I… Friday night was reasonably uneventful, with not a lot going on besides getting some yard work accomplished and playing with the kids. We made plans to go to a local indoor swimming pool on the Saturday, which is always an enjoyable thing for me. I’ve spent the majority of my life in water, having been born and raised on the shores of an open bay, It al started at the tender age of 2, when my grandmother dropped me into a body of water my father was snorkelling in… The look on his face when I waddled my way down to find him would have been priceless, had he not been wearing a scuba mask and I wasn’t a toddler. But I digress…

My boys, so far, haven’t shown much interest in the water. We tried putting Nathan into swim lessons, but they never took. He’s only just recently started to wander into deeper waters with the use of a life jacket. Alexander however, is already starting to kick and swim and take to the water like the son of a water baby that he is. So on Saturday, we joined my friend Jayden and his wife Tori at the pool, where everyone had a reasonable time, splashing and playing. I say reasonable, because Nathan tends ot become a sensitive little pill when we don’t play the way he wants. But I think he still had a good time.

Brothers of Mayhem

Sunday morning was a strange change for our household. Both boys actually allowed for a bit of sleeping in (sleeping in when you have children means no later than 9 am) followed by a breakfast of cheerios and cheesy bread. Sundays are usually our grocery and laundry day in order to get the household ready for the week to come. Although Saturdays are the usual go-to for outings, we decided to make a different plan and I took the boys to one of their favourite playgrounds while my wife made a grocery run without having to contend with the boys IN the grocery store.

They had a lot of fun, with Nathan finding some random boys to play with and Alexander raising hell all over the playground. In true toddler style and much like a domesticated cat who prefers the box than his cat bed, Alex couldn’t help but be fascinated by the trees, bushes and twigs as opposed to all the colourful play structures that sat on the property. In fact, as you’ll see from the photo below, his favourite play structure turned out to be a bike rack…

I’ve had a few people ask me why I choose to write about my time out with the boys on weekends. That’s a valid question, considering this is a Diabetes/Buddhism/Health&Fitness blog. A valid question, and here are the reasons… many people do things like open an email account for their children and send photos, videos and memos to it with the intention of providing the username and password to their children when they turn 18. In some ways, many ways, my hope is that my boys will someday read my blog and soak in my experiences and everything that was done for them, even when they didn’t assume they were getting as much as they THOUGHT they were.

The other reason is because although some may say that they didn’t choose the path they’re on, there’s no better way of finding peace than in the eyes of your children. It’s important to recognize that these experiences are JUST as important to the father as they are to the son. Or in my case, the sons. And with everything going on in the world, it’s al the more important to have something positive to read, in any forum and through any media. Food for thought… ☯️

Networks Aren’t All Wires And Tech…

Early last week, I had the opportunity to experience something different. I attended a 2-day conference related to my work. The reason I say it was different is because although I’ve attended a number of courses and seminars during my time with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, I never quite had the experience of communicating, exchanging information and business cards. It’s always been about the learning but this time it was about the networking.

I spent two days hearing others speak about matters related to my current field, which was fantastic. I also got to speak on some subject matter, myself. Never one to keep my mouth shut, I was able to speak well over time and infringed on everyone’s lunch. Shame on me, but it was free lunch so they really don’t have too much to complain about. I ended up handing out dozens of business cards and making all sorts of connections. It was phenomenal…

It definitely exposed me to a different side of the professional world. As a police officer, I was usually limited to a world where I associated with other badges. Now, my world has expanded a bit. It gives me some thoughts about what the future may hold. And I’m kind of thinking that the future may be bright enough that I’ll have to wear shades…

Anything Is Always Something More Than Nothing

The title is something I came up with years ago, usually referring to one’s personal health & fitness goals. The reasoning behind it, is that many people will assume that because all one can do is take a light walk or use extremely light weights, that it isn’t making a difference in their health and fitness. But nothing could be further from the truth. Even the lightest weights will offer more than sitting on the couch. Taking a walk may not be going for a 10-kilometre run but it will still give you more than snacking on a bowl of chips while binging a streaming service.

This concept also includes meditation. Although there are various forms of meditation and different ways of doing it, for some proper meditation means clearing their minds and thinking of nothing. Although this is a great concept, having completely nothing on one’s mind is more difficult than the average person is inclined to believe. Even with decades of experience in meditation, sitting in a quiet room and focusing on absolutely nothing is almost as elusive as trying to catch a glimpse of an eye floaty that always strays right out of your immediate view.

Speaking from personal experience, when I manage to meditate to the point where I clear my mind, I always find myself drifting and my mind will idly stray to random thoughts, memories and ideas. Although not an inherently bad thing, if one is genuinely trying to focus on nothing and allow their conscious mind to cool, this can lead to some frustration and cause the practitioner to consciously move their mind back to nothingness. This is where the connection to the first paragraph comes back into play because focusing on nothing is still something. And anything is ALWAYS something more than nothing.

Unless you’ve committed yourself to a monastic lifestyle or discipline that requires it, it’s critically important to remember that the meditative experience can be different for everyone. You shouldn’t be too hard on yourself if the type and manner of meditation that you’re pursuing tends to be elusive for you and quite difficult. For those who aren’t simply going through the motions of making it look like they’re meditating for the gimmick of it, it can take years of study, practice and in some cases even guidance from others, before you can successfully achieve one’s goals.

What’s important to remember is that if meditation allows you to relax, lets your mind cool and reflect as opposed to dwell on any particular thing, you’re still doing something beneficial for your body. And don’t be afraid to reach out to various sources for help. After all, you wouldn’t try to bench press 300 pounds if it’s your first time in the gym, right? Why try to carry the full weight of one’s mind on the first time out? Be patient. Be consistent. Work towards what YOU want to get out of meditation. You’ll be all the better for it. Food for thought… ☯️

On The Road Again…

That very special time has come again… The time when I need to leave my home and travel for a few hours to a neighbouring city to be put into a chair and have needles inserted into my eyes… Yes, you read that right: NEEDLES IN MY EYES! If you had told me, six years ago, that I would be having this done every 8 weeks I likely would have laughed at you and called you crazy. But yet, here I am. Doing it again…

I suffer from something called Diabetic Macular Edema, which is a condition where a Diabetic sufferer will develop an accumulation of fluid in the tissue of the eyes. A side effect of living years with type-1 Diabetes, the fluid causes a swelling that can blur one’s vision, hinder sight and eventually cause blindness. The only treatment currently available is to inject a prescribed medication into the eyes that reduces the swelling and dries up the fluid.

Sounds lovely, eh? Picture the scene from Clockwork Orange where the guy has his eyes held open by metal clips. I’d like to say I’m exaggerating but that’s pretty much what they use to keep my eyes open during the procedure. Freezing drops are used and I’m fully conscious and can see while this is happening so I’m usually treated with a show of swirling colors and lines, directly in my line of sight despite the fact that it’s all happening on the inside.

I’m usually blind, by the legal definition, for several hours after the injections and once the freezing drops wear off, it’s an unwanted visit to pain town for many hours to follow. Given the need for my kids to stay at home and my wife to work, I usually embark on this adventure on my own, which means I book a hotel room near the hospital and pass out for a few hours to let the pain subside once the injections are done.

Although the process is onerous and painful, it would be a lie to say that it’s entirely a bad experience. Besides the fact that it’s a proactive step towards ensuring my continued visual health, I get to have dinner in a nice, stylish little Irish pub that’s located on the hotel’s main floor. A little place called “Finn’s,” it’s usually all but dead on a Monday night, which means I get excellent and speedy service on my food and drinks and I get to observe a bit of society from a dark corner while I recover.

I’ve never been much of a club or bar person. unlike most of my counterparts, I didn’t spend my youth hitting the clubs or getting shit-faced at parties. Instead, I spent those formative years training and studying the martial arts. Some may claim they had more fun than I did. I have the benefit of saying I clearly remember all of it. But I digress… Since there’s really nothing I can take to alleviate the pain caused by the injections, a couple of cold brews help to take the edge off and I’ve yet to find a place with a burger as flavourful as Finn’s.

Given the new job I’ve been in for the past year, tomorrow morning will see me attend a couple of meetings virtually in my hotel room before checking out. Gotta love the way of the new world. It seems kind of rainy in Regina this morning, but the forecast seems to suggest it’s sunny in Saskatoon, which is important since I need to walk to the hospital. I guess I need to pack up and get on the road.

I could be bitter and complain about need to get injections in my eyes but two important facts come to the forefront. The first is that I’m pretty lucky in the sense that many people are much worse off than I am, and if getting needles in my eyes helps me to maintain my sight, I’m in! The second is that when I started taking this medication, I was going every four weeks. Now that it’s been stretched out to every eight weeks, it feels like a walk in the park by comparison, which is kind of ironic since I take a walk through a park to get to my appointment. ☯️

It’s Easier To Hate But More Powerful To Forgive…

I’ve spent the better part of my life living on the presumption that I’ve been doing everything I can to alleviate suffering in the world. From healing, training and developing myself and others to becoming a law enforcement officer to protect those who can’t protect themselves, I like to think that I’ve done more than my fair share and my tour of duty should be recognized.

Speaking strictly in general terms, an outside party looking in may agree that my tour of duty is over and that I’ve done my part. However, the elimination of suffering is a never-ending endeavour and one shouldn’t do it simply for the purposes of “doing one’s part” but rather as a part of the bigger picture that life continues on and so should one’s efforts. This has gotten me thinking about some of the unfortunate weight I’ve been carrying with me for the past number of years and what I can do about it.

The only thing worse than someone who does you wrong is someone who does you wrong that you trusted. Having caused damage in any form against you, it causes a heavy weight of negative emotion and suffering to bear down on your shoulders. It drags you down, slows you down and saps your energy and motivation. Sometimes, without even noticing it, we allow it to affect important aspects of our lives. It holds a negative energy in life, against you and against the person whom you may foster negative feelings against.

I recently took stock of my life and recognized that I have such a person; a person I trusted, someone I valued and even looked up to… Only to have them perform actions and say words that brought the very fabric of the life I was living crashing down. It took a long time to recognize that the situation was initiated by this individual, and once the initial shock of that realization had passed, I found myself experience a deep, burning emotion that I can only recall having felt a few rare times in my life: hate.

Hate is among the most insidious of emotions as it isn’t just directed towards the person in question but eats up the originating person inside, as well. It festers and can eventually lead to physical health issues, if allowed to grow and run rampant. Although one could argue that there are certain levels of hate that would be considered normal, such as hating war, famine or discrimination, hating any other individual will cause unnecessary suffering in all parties concerned.

Although I don’t consciously acknowledge it, I’ve been carrying a hatred for this one person for years. The words and actions he used that caused the difficulties in my life are not slight, by any means. But carrying this hate has caused a level of damage within me that I need to repair and heal from. And ultimately, there is really only one way to heal and move on from such a thing. I need to forgive him. This may not be an easy task, one that my instincts may even tell me I shouldn’t pursue. But only by forgiving this individual and moving forward can I hope to release this weight that’s been holding me down.

I recently reached out to a mutual acquaintance to ask if he would be willing to bridge the communication between myself and this person of interest. He has agreed to do so and in the interest of closure and moving on, I believe it will be a great step to speak with this person face-to-face, discuss what happened and finally, let him know I forgive him. Maybe he won’t care. Maybe it’ll change nothing for him. And that’s okay. Forgiveness can be helpful and healing but at the end, it’s just as much for me as it could potentially be for him. Moving on will be a great steps towards eliminating suffering within my own life. ☯️

Humming Boyz II Men…

Despite how loud and outspoken I tend to project myself as, I’ve never really been a social butterfly and I rarely keep an increased social circle within my personal life. This isn’t because I don’t WANT friends… Far from it, in fact. But the nature of how I live my life, mixed with familial and home obligations, doesn’t make for much free time to hang out and spend time with friends. And that’s fine. I have a handful of people whom I call “friend,” they know who they are and I get to see them when our respective lives allow us to.

With that in mind, it’s a normal thing for people to come in and out of our lives. Sometimes it happens organically and doesn’t really change a great deal. I have people that I spent TONS of time with, twenty years ago and somehow life carried us in different directions and life has progressed all without the sense of loss that should normally come with that lost connection. However, once in a while a person may make an impact on one’s life that makes it a little bit harder to accept their departure when fate deems it necessary for them to step away.

We usually navigate our own lives oblivious to the direct impact we have on other individuals. And that impact can be either negative or positive but the reality is that any given person will ALWAYS have an impact on others. When you meet someone genuine, someone who is helpful, a teacher, guide, mentor and friend, that impact is all the more measurable and important. It’s made all the more special by the fact that these people often don’t assume or consider how much of that impact they’re responsible for. And that’s kind of what makes it special… If a person did all these things with the purpose of being recognize and considered as a genuine, impactful person, I think it would lose a little something.

In some cases, many cases, we are oblivious of the importance of such people until we’re at risk of losing them. And that loss can come in many forms, whether illness, death, falling out and misunderstandings, moving away to a new location or simply unavoidable circumstances of life. Once they’re gone, it leaves a significant gap and sense of loss and one can suddenly regret that the requirements and rigours of life prevented more time spent with these individuals. But, such is life! That’s why it’s important to value and appreciate the important people in your life while you have them. Because you never know when someone who impacted your life significantly will have to leave. ☯️

If it Isn’t Hard, Is It Even Worth Doing?

I read an interesting quote by Ashton Kutcher, of all people, that says, “If it doesn’t seem insurmountable, how is it going to be a life purpose?” An interesting quote and deep meaning behind it, confirming my opinion that knowledge and wisdom can come from any source. Of course, as some of my readers would and have pointed out, a quote is only as good as the confirmation of its source. Realistically, unless one is in a position to actually speak to the source to confirm the quote’s accuracy, it’s up in the air. However, that makes the words no less true. But I digress…

The point and purpose is to speak about those “insurmountable” goals and life purposes and how you can get past the BELIEF that they’re insurmountable. When I look back at my life, I recognize that some of the goals and purposes I planned for myself seemed impossible at the time. Considering I’ve achieved almost everything I set out to do in life, it almost seems laughable that I was as concerned as I was that I would REACH those goals. But Everest always looks insurmountable until you’re touching the flags at the top, right?

When I was younger and I stepped into a dojo for the first time, my health was waning, I had no support from the outside on my choice to start training and I believed my life would end before I reached my late teens. That first class was among one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, considering my blood sugars dropped, I had no physical constitution and the workout was gruelling for those who had been there for a while so you can probably imagine how difficult it was for me. But like taking that first step up the mountain, completing that first class paved the way for me to push froward and reach my goals. The same can be said of most things in life.

It’s important that goals and purposes be difficult. Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight. If you can simply coast through to the finish line, it technically isn’t a race, right? But while contemplating that thought, it’s important to bear in mind that difficulty is a subjective thing. Maybe walking ten minutes to the corner store is a fuckin’ joke to me and I don’t consider it exercise, despite walking for twenty minutes, round trip. But someone else may have difficulties in mobility, health issues and other problems that make walking for twenty minutes a significant challenge. This means that it’s important never to judge someone else on their chosen goals, even if they may seem like less to you.

Another important quote that I like, in case y’all haven’t noticed that I love quotes, is attributed to Muhammed Ali who said, “Often it isn’t the mountains ahead that wear you out, it’s the little pebble in your shoe.” Getting started and building one’s momentum is what will usually get you there and accomplishing your goals. Just remember that when it gets hard, and it will, that’s normal. If it isn’t hard, it isn’t worth doing. The easy path isn’t challenging. Food for thought… ☯️