Last month, I decided to spend the entire month of August without consuming any alcohol. My unfortunate habit in the past couple of years has been to enjoy a drink when writing or even just after a hard day’s work, while sitting in my garage with a good cigar. In the following video, I explain that month and some of the things I’ve noticed as a result. ☯️
So I was sitting at my desk recently, surfing the web and seeking inspiration on potential topics I could write about, when I came across an article on something called “green noise.” Way back in 2019, I published a post on white, pink and brown noise and their potential benefits. You can read that post here. The tall and short of it, is that any of these “noises” are artificially constructed sounds that exist on at a particular frequency and can provide certain key benefits, depending on how you’re using them.
For example, plenty of people use white noise machines to help them sleep better and get some rest. For those who find that white noise doesn’t help, they can try pink or red noise (also known as Brownian or brown noise) as they have deeper depth and different effect. Pink noise for example, can potentially aid sleep by reducing one’s brain waves to increase one’s sleep stability and provide for a deeper sleep. I’ve used all three at a variety of times in my life, including during sleep, meditation and even when performing work tasks where I need to focus and block out the outside world.
Recently, I discovered green noise, which made me give my head a shake and think I was getting punked. After all, how many “noises” can there really be? Turns out, it isn’t all bullshit. In fact, I’ve recently save a YouTube video to my list that’s 10 straight hours of green noise. Although not necessarily effective as a sleep aid, green noise provides a soothing, calming effect that can be effective at calming oneself, meditating or even just to centre oneself before GOING to bed. I’ve been trying it and listening while I sit outside and enjoy a cigar. I’m not sure if it’s the cigar or the green noise, but the effects were calming.
When I started to look further into it, I came to realize that if white noise is artificially constructed, it would make sense that multiple different levels of noise could potentially be created as well. And when I looked into it to see if I could find others and lo and behold, there are more noise colours than infinity stones (little Marvel comics joke, if you didn’t catch it). While I would encourage anyone interested to do their own research, here are a few of the more interesting ones that I found.
Blue noise is something that works opposite to brown noise as it exists at the higher end of the sound spectrum. This means it likely wouldn’t be good for helping with sleep or relaxation but from what I’ve found, it’s used as some sort of distortion eliminator during sound editing and engineering. I also found violet noise, which can apparently be used to treat certain hearing issues, such as tinnitus, since it apparently blocks the ringing someone with tinnitus tends to hear.
There’s apparently also a grey noise and a black noise, which is basically silence. Wikipedia has a great page defining all of these (although without their benefits) and you can access it here. I still use pink and brown noise a great deal, for those rare occasions when I find a moment to meditate. Green noise is certainly interesting and can provide benefit if you’re just sitting outside, enjoying the weather and want to add a bit of relaxation to your day.
There are several YouTube videos that play lengthy clips of any noise, should you decide to try any of them. I’m partial to my Noisli app, which contains white, pink and brown but there are also some other apps out there that likely feature green noise. At the end of the day, adding a bit of noise to your silence can be helpful and provide some benefits. But you’ll need to try it yourself to find out. ☯️
I had an interesting Sunday, last weekend. Although I usually make a reasonable attempt at pushing myself, I can admit that there are almost as many times where I succumb to flopping down in a comfy chair with a cigar on the weekends as opposed to getting at some of the things I should be accomplishing, like, oh, I don’t know… WORKING OUT! But when we arrived from our trip to the East Coast almost two weeks ago, I was taken aback at the state of my back yard.
The back yard is where the majority of our daily sunlight strikes, with very little impacting the front yard. This means that growth, both for lawns and weeds, is at least two-fold in the back yard. It can make weekends challenging, since I usually prefer my Sundays to be a time of relaxation before getting back into the work week with maybe a workout thrown in. Since I was kind enough to ignore the yard the previous weekend, I knew I would have to attack it last weekend or face some significant difficulties in bring the weeds a and lawn growth under control before the autumn struck.
Cue last Sunday morning. My well-meaning intentions included waking at 5 or 6 so that I could get started on the yard before the Sun rose high enough to turn it into a proverbial frying pan. Given that my toddler had us up at about 4:45 a.m. on Saturday morning, my body fiercely objected to waking at such an hour. So I rolls out of bed just shy before 9:00 a.m. Okay, not such a great start. I started my morning by sitting down with some caffeine and watching an episode of Star Wars: obi-Wan Kenobi. If you haven’t watched it, I highly recommend it.
I stepped outside in the morning heat and my oldest son, Nathan decided to join me. He actually wanted to help, so I had him grab his gardening gloves and gave him a weed-pulling job on the promise of letting him use the weed whacked later on. I started by mowing all the overgrown grass while Nathan plucked all then weeds from the Stoney path we have on the west side of the back yard. by the time I had mowed the lawn, he had finished pulling every weed. I mean, that area was immaculate. I was reasonably impressed and a deal is a deal, so he got the weed whacked out and I instructed him on where and how he was to use it. he went to work.
I wound up weeding the large, concrete circle planter that used to house an actual tree while Nathan finished whacking the weeds, as it were. He worked hard and followed instructions. I’m embarrassed to admit that I was quite impressed at the work acumen he was showing this morning. Once he had been using the weed whacked for a while, he asked to take a break and go inside, which made sense since the Sun was starting to make things unbearable. I was soaked myself, having toiled in the back yard for about two hours at that point.
He went inside and I soon discovered WHY he wanted to take a break… he had used the weed whacked too close to his play structure and busted both sides of the cord the weed whacked uses. And easy fix but to a 7-year old, he was likely done because it would trim weeds anymore. It was a good idea for him to cool off and get some water in him at that point anyway. I finished up what I was doing, followed by a 1-litre bottle of cold water, some fruit/veggie juice and a nice cigar. My Sunday had finally arrived…
I decided to spare all of you from the dampness showing through the lower part of that Superman shirt but as you can clearly see from the damp sheen on my forehead, it took quite a while for me to cool down and in fact, it didn’t happen until I got back inside. I performed a quick, 30-minute marine workout and once I cleaned myself up, I had to run to the grocery store to grab a few essentials And spent the rest of my day inside the cool sanctuary of my home while doing start-of-week laundry.
The only unfortunate part is that between the heat, the yard work, the workout and everything else, my blood sugars played a fun game they like to call “roller coaster.” I bounced low and high a number of times throughout the day, proving yet again that just about everything affects blood sugars. I had it under control by the time I crashed into bed, but it added to the overall exhaustion. Looking forward to the coming weekend to see what activities can potentially be done with the kids instead of focused on yard work. ☯️
A short while back, I treated myself to some moderately-priced media equipment, which allows me to more effectively make videos for my YouTube page. And by the way, if you aren’t a follower on my YouTube page, please take a few moments to jump over there and click the follow button. thirty seconds for you, great deal of help for me. You can find my page by searching “The Blogging Buddhist” in the search bar. But I’m getting off track here…
I had thrown a post up on my Facebook page (yes, I also have a Facebook page, which you guys can follow as well. Find it by searching, you guessed it, “The Blogging Buddhist”) asking if anyone would have any interest in having me do a live event where I could answer questions and chat about various topics I write about, such as health & fitness, Diabetes and martial arts. I said I’d base whether I tried it or not on how many like I got and I also posted something similar on here.
To my unfortunate surprise, the response had no pulse. I got a couple of likes through facebook, which was nice but I otherwise had no show of interest, whatsoever on either platform. While this is disappointing, to say the least, I’m still interested in trying it out and have friends who have made it work and look interesting (Thanks, Ricky!) so I’m tempted to try it, despite the lukewarm response. In all reality, many if not most people may not necessarily respond to some thing that requires their interaction with a posting, so I kind of get it. Maybe if they come across the Live event, they’ll be tempted to jump in.
With all of that in mind, I’ve decided that I will go live on Facebook this evening at 6:30 p.m. Central Standard Time (Saskatchewan time). The event will last somewhere between 30 to 60 minutes, depending on attendance and interest, and will cover various topics including what’s mentioned above: martial arts, Diabetes management, health & fitness (from the Diabetic perspective, especially). Come join me and throw out any questions you may have been wondering about. Hopefully, it’ll be entertaining for all. See you there! ☯️
I have a pretty heated love/hate relationship with dentistry and dentists’ offices. It all stems from a very young age, when my parents started to bring me to the dentist office against my will. Imagine that, even as a young child I didn’t like being told what to do. Funny. But in all seriousness, when looking at it from a child’s perspective, we drag our kids in to a dentist office with their best interests in mind. After all, oral health is extremely important. But then, we subject the kids to random strangers basically grappling their way around their mouths and expect them to sit still and be happy about it. It can be difficult, at best.
For me, it came down to the speeches. I’m not one for being lectured. In fact, I was once sent home from elementary school after telling my principal that my parents weren’t paying him to lecture me. I don’t remember what I did to get sent there in the first place but as you can imagine, it didn’t go well. As you can no doubt imagine, I wasn’t a huge fan of brushing my teeth regularly and my parents would usually give me grief over it. It got to the point where I would almost try to sneak into bed and pretend to be asleep so they’d leave me the hell alone about it. It became a point of contention throughout my childhood and especially when I’d get scheduled for an appointment at the dentist’s office.
Picture this: you’re constantly getting grief from your parents over how well you brush your teeth, despite how much effort you put into it. Then, they bring you to this medical office where random strangers basically finger-blasts your fuckin’ mouth for an hour before a “doctor” comes in to look at you and tell you how bad you’re doing and how you need to brush more, floss more… basically tell you what you should be doing in the comfort of your own home where he has no dominion. I make it sound like I’m petty and bitter, but bear in mind that I’m recalling these things from a child’s memory.
The point is, is got frustrating enough for me that I began developing a deep, sincere hatred of dentistry from a young age and that frustration carried on into adulthood. The biggest piss-off was when I would be telling the staff that I was just there for a cleaning and didn’t want an examination to be given or a speech on oral health, only to be told my parents had requested the exam and I had no choice. I’d give my parents crap for it afterwards, but obviously that had little effect. So much for consent.
This dislike of having strangers in my mouth (insert oral jokes here) carried on into adulthood, to the point where I occasionally neglected my oral health for months on end, going well beyond a year. There was always an excuse; either I was transferring between postings or moving houses or tied up on shift work… When I’d finally go in, I had done myself more damage than good since my cleanings would take longer due to the prolonged absence from the chair. I eventually came to accept my fate of having to visit the dentist’s office every four months at their recommendation.
It still isn’t easy; I usually schedule a cleaning only to have the hygienist say, “I see you haven’t been examined by the dentist in quite a long time. Can we fit him in with you, today?” In the interest of my oral health, I’ve often said yes but for the most part, I usually make it clear that I’m only there for the cleaning and want nothing to do with the dentist. It makes for some tense visits but it’s hard to teach an old dog new tricks and as an adult, I’m paying for the cleaning so do the cleaning! (Takes deep breath and exhales slowly).
In recent years, dentists have begun addressing a recessed gum I have at the gum line of my bottom teeth. Although I understand the logistics behind what’s happening and the risks, I have no interest in having the roof of my mouth painfully grafted to attach to a single tooth. I’ve been through enough pain in my life. Last Wednesday, I had a cleaning appointment where they addressed this concern yet again, which I promptly responded to leave it alone and just do the cleaning. like parrots, these guys…
All jesting and complaining aside, good oral health is important and quite integral to one’s overall health. In recent decades, studies have shown that poor oral health can contribute to heart disease, cancer and can even have an effect of Diabetes. HealthLine.com has a good article on the topic that you can read here. And that’s on top of the obvious stuff, such as cavities, gum disease and tooth loss. So despite all my pissing and moaning about it, oral health is pretty important, especially to people with Diabetes who are basically affect by EVERYTHING.
All in all, it doesn’t have to be a complicated thing. Good oral health starts with you, at home. Brush your teeth regularly. Although the mantra was a MINIMUM three times a day when I was a kid, the prevailing number is at least two. Brushing first thing in the morning gets rid of all that bacteria that accumulated and is conveniently sitting in your mouth, not to mention getting rid of that nasty morning breath. Pair that up with a decent mouthwash and you’re good to go. Brushing right before bed ensures that you remove all the food particles from your mouth rather than let them sit against your teeth and gums all night while you sleep and decay your teeth.
Flossing or using a water pick, which was recommended for me this time around, is also important. Oral health starts at home with you. We get so busy in our daily lives that we often neglect little aspects that are important to pay attention to. Good oral hygiene and health is an easy way to prevent issues that would otherwise burden and endanger one’s health unnecessarily. Will I get over my dislike of dentists? I have faith but I doubt it. When something is rooted in your psyche since childhood, it can be difficult to drop. But that won’t stop me from taking my own steps to ensure good oral hygiene. With everything Diabetes throws at me, it’s one less health problem I need to be worrying about… ☯️
I’ve almost finished my first full week back to work since coming back from vacation. Unlike most people, I chose to drag my work laptop with me and complete certain tasks while I was away. I’ve received mixed comments for various people on this practice… Some, believing I should completely shut out work while I’m gone and others admiring my tenacity and loyalty to the work. For myself, my OCD just wouldn’t allow certain tasks to go a full two weeks without my hands on it so there I went.
Despite having had my computer and access to emails, one of the things that surprised me the most upon my return was the accumulation and piling of work that continued to happen. It’s made this week somewhat hectic, especially in light of specific issues I’ve had to deal with. One of those issues, as one could well imagine, is my lack of fitness. I’ve fallen into the same precipice as most people who go on vacation; I never exercised.
Don’t get me wrong; I went swimming a couple of times with Nathan and had several reasonably long-distance walks. But in terms of working up a sweat for something other than the New Brunswick humidity, I was found significantly lacking. This is why, once we were safely back home, I decided to knuckle down and push myself to include a number of steps in my daily routine. My job is very sedentary, seeing me at a desk for several hours a day. Even with the occasional health break to get up, stretch and take short walks, this style of work can be detrimental on the body, especially if you aren’t exercising outside of work hours.
If you’ve my blog for even a short period of time, there’s no need to remind you that just about EVERYTHING affects Type-1 Diabetes, especially the blood sugar levels. Working at a desk all day, followed by a carb-heavy supper and flopping on the couch for a couple of hours before staggering your way to bed in a half-awake stupor is not conducive to good blood sugar levels. Hence, the need for some fuckin’ exercise in one’s down time.
I decided to incorporate a few easy changes into my daily routine. As I mentioned above. I promise I’ll stop repeating myself. Carrying on. I’m starting my morning with a smoothie. This doesn’t seem like a big change but the reality is that starting your morning off with some form of breakfast is important. although there are different schools of thought behind this, starting your day with a positive boost of nutrition is integral to having the kind of energy you need to reach the end of your day. I also still have a BlendJet and I never use it, so this justifies my purchase. But I digress…
Next, is a daily workout. This one is a bit more difficult, especially since I have a tendency of overdoing it and injuring myself. For example, I did a short, body-weight and dumbbell only workout on Sunday evening before starting back to work. My goal had been to wake up early on Monday morning and do some light cardio before work but my legs refused to function and basically stuck a middle finger up at me (or is it middle toe, since it has feet?). The goal is to start small and work one’s way back up. Here’s the workout I did…
On its face, it’s nothing out of this world and I should have been able to do it with ease… Such was my mistake. Even simple workouts will require some easing into after a hiatus of any length, even a short one. But staying active is important. I don’t have the space to post all the benefits of exercise, honestly. But doing so helps with cardiac health, weight management, blood pressure, blood sugar levels… The list goes on and on. Karate classes also start up again next month, so that should be fun.
Last but not least, which has also elicited some mixed comments from folks, is I’m doing an alcohol-free month. I should have waited until I made it to the end of the month to include this or write about it but who am I kidding? I’m too stubborn NOT to stay off the hooch for another two weeks. It’s not that there’s a problem with my alcohol consumption, per se… But sometimes I get a bit too comfortable sipping wine or a straight whiskey when I’m writing. But I I’ll write a more comprehensive post on THAT aspect next month, once we hit September.
It’s amazing how just a few small changes can help with any aspect of one’s health. Whether you’re goal is to increase you cardio/stamina, lose some weight, manage your blood sugars or just become stronger, healthier and live longer, you can’t lose. You just have to keep moving. After all, no one ever won a race by sitting still. Food for thought…☯️
Hey folks, I’ve been blogging for a few years now and it dawns on me that I don’t often get many questions or comments on my writing (unless it’s something negative that usually isn’t commented visibly). Anyway, with my recent purchase of some new media equipment, I thought I would take this show live and actually do a Facebook Live event where I could answer questions as they come in. Topics of discussion would include health & fitness, Diabetes, martial arts and thoughts on general matters. I’d love to give this a go and see if it’s potentially something I could start doing regularly.
I’ve already posted about this on my facebook page (yes, for those who didn’t know I have a Facebook page AND a YouTube page! Y’all should go follow those right meow!) and this post will appear there as well. My plan is if I get a significant number of likes on this post, signifying people’s interest in participating, I would schedule the live for this coming weekend and post the schedule on my Facebook page. I could do one in the morning and one in the evening to accommodate folks who may not be available. I’ll leave it to all of you to determine whether this happens or not. ☯️
I recently read something about how one’s heart and mind are a little bit like an attic. It tends to gather and accumulate a lot of stuff that not only will one never use again but it takes up space and can increase the overall weight one is carrying. This can be tedious and can cause a lot of hardship, especially if you’re the type of person who tends to dwell and focus on these old dusty memories and feelings.
Much like a dusty attic, we sometimes need to clean said dust off and eliminate the weight of the hard feelings and bad memories that hold us back. This can be easier said than done, and shouldn’t be mistaken with forgetting the memories in question. After all, those who forget the past will often be condemned to repeat it. But by eliminating the excess pain and emotion and retaining the memories, one can begin to remove the pain and sadness that take up the most place in our heart and mound. And once that clutter is removed, it will amaze you how much farther you can run.
Old quarrels no longer matter. Confrontation, arguments, whether you were right or wrong and painful memories will do very little else than cause further pain. This is why it’s so important to let them go. Like so much sand between your fingers, let these negative memories wash away with the current, free to flow through your fingertips and off into non-existence. Once you reach this level of freedom, it will go a significant way towards eliminating the suffering in your life, which will in turn make it easier for you to help reduce the suffering in the lives of others. Food for thought… ☯️
One of the big issues with having Type-1 Diabetes is the fact that I can never just get up and go somewhere. It’s not so bad if I’m just heading around the corner to the grocery store or running a quick errand. But even that will have a tendency to involve checking my blood sugars before getting behind the wheel, It can be a onerous process, especially if you’re headed somewhere that will have you out of the house for several hours.
I usually carry a small shoulder sling, which is basically a one-stepped backpack but smaller. No, it’s not a purse, you fuckers! And even if it was, we’re in 2022; I think we should be okay with it even if it was. But I digress. In this backpack I carry some fast-acting carbs on the form of jelly beans, a glucometer, a snack and a small travel-sized first aid kit. All of these things can be life-saving in the event of an incident involving low blood sugar or light injuries.
Things get even worse when I plan to be away overnight. And yes, I know that I promised I’d stay off the vacation posts until we started travelling back to Saskatchewan and I intend to hold to that. But one particular detail happened that directly relates to today’s subject matter. When we were planning this trip across the country, I made a point of purchasing and packing a small cooler pack intended to contain ALL of the Diabetic supplies I would nee in order to survive my trip away from home.
Although it isn’t uncommon for me to forget something, I forgot something rather important this time around; I forgot my CGM sensors. Now, some of you may be wondering why this is a big deal. After all, I survived for three decades before I started using the bloody things so a couple of weeks shouldn’t be a big deal, right? The problem is that consistent blood sugar control is a constant thing when one has Type-1 Diabetes and that control is all the better and tighter when I have the benefit of my insulin pump’s SmartGuard system to measure and maintain my blood sugar by testing through the CGM every five minutes.
As to what exactly happened that I forgot AN ENTIRE FUCKING BOX OF SENSORS ON MY DESK is beyond me. All I know is that by the second day of our journey, the current sensor expired and when I tried to swap it out I realized I had none in my cooler pack. There it was; I was thousands of kilometres from home with no CGM. Okay. No problem. No biggie. I won’t cry about it (much). I figured I would continue on the road and pick up a box at whatever pharmacy I came across while travelling. This has been my practice with things such as insulin and test strips. Hell, I’ve even schmoozed my way into getting free glucometers that way, which is why I have a spare one in the car, now.
But continuous glucose monitoring sensors seemed to be an unfortunate exception to my travelling habits. My first attempt was in a small town outside of Ottawa called Arnprior. I asked the pharmacy technician if they carried Medtronic products. She had no bloody clue. She got the pharmacist for me, who had no idea what Medtronic was. He tried looking it up and I even spelled it for him. He confirmed he didn’t carry CGM sensors. I could see Freestyle Libre sensors behind him, but I intended to use this ONLY as a last resort. The pharmacist added insult to injury by saying that if any pharmacy in town carried something, he made a point of carrying it as well so it was unlikely I’d find what I was looking for in Arnprior.
Alright. Okay. That’s all VERY weird. From a pharmaceutical standpoint, I would have thought that names like Medtronic would be pretty common and well-known. Apparently I was wrong. I left the pharmacy and we continued to travel until we reached a small town in Quebec where we bunked for the night. I didn’t look for a pharmacy that night, running my pump on manual mode. When we finally made it to Dalhousie, I attended the local pharmacy and dearth with a pharmacist I had graduated from high school with.
Besides the pleasure and nostalgia of dealing with an old friend, I was surprised to hear that she also had no idea what Medtronic was. What the hell…? Did no one else in the eastern half of the country use an insulin pump? I was taken aback but I finally relented and asked to purchase a Freestyle Libre, otherwise known as the “poor man’s CGM” to get me through the next little while until I could get my hands on sensors from somewhere, She did me one better and gave me a sample pack she had received from the distributor when they came out with the Freestyle Libre 2. I was set.
I’m obviously running on the Freestyle Libre 2 at the moment and taking advantage of the immediate ability to scan the sensor with my phone and get an immediate sensor glucose reading but it’s obviously not the same as having my Guardian CGM and SmartGuard taking the reins. It illustrates the importance of ensuring I pack properly and don’t forget anything. Having my wife double check my bag can also be a good idea.
Although I should be used to travelling with Type-1 Diabetes, one can never be too careful. And I learned an important lesson that even thought I USUALLY run to a pharmacy if I run short of something, it doesn’t mean every pharmacy will always carry what I need. I can promise and guarantee that I’m going to be more cautious and hug my sensors tight when I get home. It makes the planning and organizing of any trip all the more important to ensure there’s no disruption in the proper care of my Diabetes and blood sugar management. True story. ☯️
Today marks my family’s second day on our epic journey across Canada and I’m clearly aware that I can’t spend fourteen straight days posting about the trip. I mean, I COULD… But the idea is to maintain a readership, not scare them all away. With that in mind, I’ve decided that I’ll be posting about the trip every few days, after photos and material have been gathered in order for share my thoughts on the trip. With that in mind, let’s get on with today’s post…
Sometimes, navigating society can be pretty difficult. You’re probably think “d-uh,” right? Beyond societal expectations and personal hopes of acceptance, there’s also the little detail that we’re all individuals. Although this should be hailed as a good thing, it also means that each and every one of us has our own thoughts, beliefs, perspective and personalities. The downside to THAT is that we don’t always mix well with those aspects in others, which ultimately leads to us not playing well with others.
Picture this; you’re working with an individual who has been tasked with a project. You’ve been asked to look into that project and determine its status as well as verify the quality of the work. During this verification, you notice that some aspects of the project aren’t quite up to snuff with how it was requested. In a casual and conversational setting, you mention this in passing to the individual working on it. You walk away happy that’s you’re able to clearly discuss this matter and look forward top seeing the updated project.
Some time goes by and you come to realize that you’ve received no updates. Curious and somewhat confused, you reach out to the individual in question and discover that not only have they not updated the project, they’re displeased with “how you addressed them” and don’t wish to communicate with you. You’re utterly confused. You run the scenario in your head and can’t understand what you might have said that could have been interpreted as offensive.
Here’s the thing; you likely didn’t! There’s an old saying that goes something like, “I only control my words, not how you react to them…” I have no idea where the saying stems from, but I’ve heard different versions at different points throughout my life. And it’s pretty accurate. With some people, you can be absolutely sweet as sugar and they’ll still get pissed off at you and think you’ve offended or disrespected them. In most instances, there isn’t much you can do about that. It’s not a “you” problem, it’s a “them” problem.
Now, I used a workplace example for this scenario but it can and does happen in one’s personal life, as well. Sometimes, it can be something as simple as missing a comma in a text message and it changes the tone, causing the recipient to take it offensively, regardless of whether it was intended that way or not. For most, this requires the ability to allow room for clarification of the interpretation rather than getting all snowflake-ish about it. But this isn’t always possible and if you’re the one overreacting about something, you may not be amenable to taking that step. Changing one’s perspective can be difficult.
And ultimately, one needs to ask oneself, even if you didn’t MEAN to offend or disrespect someone, does it genuinely make it any less offensive to the other person? If someone makes a joke or makes light of something they consider comedic but happens to be something personal and sensitive to the other, their feelings are genuine even if you didn’t mean to harm them. It’s pretty easy to sit behind a keyboard and say that one should apologize for the harm, even if it wasn’t intended as such. But this practice can become an exhausting and futile exercise, especially when dealing with individuals in one’s life who become offended and hurt at absolutely everything.
At the end of the day, there’s no easy answer to this scenario. It’s simply one of those things that a person needs to accept and recognize requires some give and take from both sides of the conversation. For the offended party, it’s important to recognize that allowing yourself to have an open perspective on what the intent of the message or action is, is important to proper communication and to prevent unnecessary misunderstandings. For the one relaying the message or performing the words or actions, be willing to view things through the recipients lens and accept that even though you may have done nothing wrong, it doesn’t eliminate the suffering that may have been cause. Food for thought… ☯️