Author: Shawn

I am a practitioner of the martial arts and student of the Buddhist faith. I have been a Type 1 Diabetic since I was 4 years old and have been fighting the uphill battle it includes ever since. I enjoy fitness and health and looking for new ways to improve both, as well as examining the many questions of life. Although I have no formal medical training, I have amassed a wealth of knowledge regarding health, Diabetes, martial arts as well as Buddhism and philosophy. My goal is to share this information with the world, and perhaps provide some sarcastic humour along the way. Welcome!

It’s Your Job To Know The Job

The job market is a strange thing. Anyone who’s looked for employment can surely relate to that effect, and likely agree. I always get a kick out of the eternal paradox of requiring potential candidates to gain experience, but every place of employment requires five years’ experience in order to get hired. The chicken or the egg, that’s the paradox they’re throwing at you.

I bring this up because I applied for a job last year, right before I took my walkabout in New Brunswick. If memory serves correctly, it would have been sometime around September of 2019. I won’t get into the details but it was a pretty enticing position, with the promise of a peaceful existence for my family and I. I eagerly applied and even visited the community where the job would be, all in the hopes that they would hire me.

Considering my current state of life, I was pretty motivated. I provided more information than was required through the job posting and kept in contact with the community’s mayor repeatedly over a three month period (the job was posted through the community’s town office). When I had an unrelated medical appointment that saw me travel past the community, I stopped into the town office and introduced myself, met the staff and even examined some of the equipment I’d be using if I were hired.

There was a lull, of course. The Christmas holiday came and went, and there wasn’t much news during those weeks as everyone was on holidays and no one was really communicating. I was warned that the community moves slowly and that every decision they take is extremely painful in how long it takes. I took the comment at face value at the time, but man, were they NOT kidding.

I got back in contact with the mayor sometime in early January of 2020, after the holidays had passed. That was when I discovered that the position was not only a significantly lower pay rate than what I currently enjoyed, it was only part time. I was crushed. I got into some in-depth discussions with the mayor about finding the funding to increase the position to 40 hours a week, but it was all left in the air.

Honestly, I kind of put the whole thing on the back burner and forgot about it for a few months. COVID-19 came and changed the world, and most of the little details I had sitting on that back burner became insignificant. Then I got an interesting e-mail last week from a “hiring manager” for the community in question. He was reaching out to have me fill out and complete a shit-ton of documents for an “application package” to get hired for the position I had coveted, some months ago.

I know exactly what you’re probably thinking. “If you want the job that badly, suck it up and complete the paperwork they’re asking you for…” First of all, shaddup! But seriously, there’s a trend that seems to see employers asking for the moon when all they need is the shadow. I felt as though I was either being slighted or not taken seriously, especially considering that I was more than adequately qualified for the position I was applying for. That may sound like a vanity (and it probably is), but it’s no less correct.

I politely informed the hiring manager that I had already submitted a resume, cover letter and all the pertinent certification and training documents that constituted a complete application package and that some of the requirements he was proposing were top-heavy and not appropriate for someone experienced in the field of employment we were discussing. He confessed that the position was still going forward as part-time, which I felt meant I could speak freely since I wouldn’t be pursuing the job anyway (I can’t surrender a full time job for a part time one, especially at a lower salary).

I contacted the mayor and informed him of the issues I felt were of concern. I was surprised when he responded and thanked me for my input and told me he would be discussing it with his hiring board. But I felt slighted at the fact I was being put through the ringer for a job I was already qualified, trained and experienced to do. and I’ve been dealing with that obstacle for the past two years.

With the end of the quarantine on the horizon, there will be a vacuum in the working world. Some jobs will never come back to what they were; the absence of certain positions will have shown employers that those positions will no longer be required. More’s the pity. Some jobs will need to be filled, and only those who are able to swallow their pride and fight to gain employment will be able to find it. Perhaps I have a bit of pride I need to be rid of, myself.

My mother always said, there’s no shame in any job. Even the most menial of jobs need to be done by SOMEBODY, so if you happen to be that SOMEBODY, do the job to the best of your ability and with pride. Then, you’re guaranteed that you’re working for a reason, no matter what job you do. I had to pass on this job, but employers need to understand that they may need to swallow some pride as well. Long, convoluted application processes won’t be the status quo, especially since the applying populace won’t have any of it. ☯

Cause And Effect ⚖️

I used to love physics in high school. Yes, I was one of those freaks; I even took some of the advanced physics classes in my senior year for extra credit. A part of me gets a headache every time I even THINK about some of the concepts we studied in those classes, while another part of me absolutely immersed myself in it and considered it the highlight of my high school years. And no, before you ask I didn’t carry a pocket protector or have a little strip of tape holding my glasses together.

I had an interesting discussion over a week ago about the concept of karma. Much like most of us have at some point, some folks try to seek out some form of faith and are uncertain where to look. During this discussion, it was mentioned that the concept of karma was considered more as a result of cause and effect as opposed to some form of intervention from a divine presence. I think this was an interesting comment, especially since that’s basically what karma is; cause and effect.

Nature and the universe has a way of balancing itself out. Think about the course of your day and how things end up. If you walk up to a hornet’s nest and kick it, you’ll get stung. Cause and effect. And this happens in just about every aspect of our lives. Looking at it simply from a physics perspective, Isaac Newton once explained that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. He was mostly referring to the exercised forces on objects that counteract one another, but the concept is very much the same.

The so-called “Law of cause and Effect” states that every effect has a specific and predictable cause and every cause or action has a specific and predictable effect. The back and forth that takes place within this law is a result of the choices you make, the decisions you take and the path you choose to pursue in life. Sounds a bit like karma to me…🤷‍♂️

I could get into Einstein’s theory of special relativity and REALLY give everyone a nosebleed (myself included), but quantum physiques was never a specialty or forte of mine. If you want to seriously fall down the rabbit hole without the benefit of a net, feel free to Google “causality” and see how long it takes before you need several shots of Fireball to make the buzzing in your head come to a stop. But I digress…

Karma, such as it is, is defined as the effect on one’s life from accumulated causes they’ve generated. Yes, within Buddhist terminology, karma is considered as “the sum of a person’s actions in this and previous states of existence, viewed as deciding their fate in future existences.” I think that’s pretty spot on, and whether you buy into the concept of reincarnation or moving on to another form of existence, the message if pretty simple: live well and you’ll be well. Live badly and you may live badly.

Something from my Catholic upbringing is working its way up to the surface… Something about living by the sword means dying by the sword… Really, if you look closely enough at most schools of faith and even people who believe themselves to be Atheists (because believing in nothing is still believing in SOMETHING, but I’ll save that for another day), there’ll be something similar or identical to this concept.

So effectively, I’m sure you’ve noticed that those who intentionally do wrong, live a life of violence, commit crimes and harm others, usually don’t go on to retire at a ripe old age, hugging their grandchildren while sipping lemonade on the porch. There’s a lot to be said for living a “good” life and doing “good” things. No matter what your faith or your thoughts, living as pure and noble a life is what every person should aspire to. ☯

CGM Is A No-Go…

Well, damn! Just shy of three weeks after starting on Continuous Glucose Monitoring with my new insulin pump, I’ve discontinued its use and I have no idea if I’ll be able to get back on it. I’ve already described some of the problems I started out with, using CGM in a post from last week entitled Step By Step, Day By Day… but the past week has been even worse. In twenty days, I burned through a seventy-day supply of CGM sensors. How did I get here?

The first instance is described in the linked post, so I won’t get into THAT one, but even that one gets me to my second sensor on the second day, which should only have happened after seven days. Luckily, the second sensor lasted the full week. I was elated and happy, and just a little bit impressed at how the pump would instantly stop and start delivering insulin based on my blood sugar levels. It wasn’t responding quite as quickly as I would have hoped, given some of there highs and lows I had, but I guess the idea is to get levels to taper off as opposed to just suddenly dropping a high.

But anyway, the third sensor I placed barely lasted twenty-four hours. Two workouts and some hot showers later and the adhesive dried out and the sensor slipped. After about a week and a half I was already on my fourth sensor, which should have lasted me a month! No small wonder that I’ve grown frustrated and have taken a break from CGM.

It seems as though all these little problems, lack of adhesive, faulty sensors, bad sites full of scar tissue, etc… are a repeat occurrence for me. Consistent physical activity, especially long bike rides in the sunny, Saskatchewan heat, doesn’t bode well for CGM. I’ve even tried wrapping band-aids around the adhesive site in an effort to try and keep the site intact, to no avail.

The night before last was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I noticed that the adhesive was starting to lift on the current sensor, which still had six days left before requiring replacement. In an effort to keep from having issues, I added additional bandages to keep the damn thing in place. Next thing I know, my pump gives me a message indicating that the sensor was “updating” and not to calibrate. It was also nice enough to tell me that this process could take up to three hours. Lovely…

When it finally allowed me to test my blood sugar and calibrate, it didn’t accept the reading and told me to wait 15 minutes and test again. I did just that. Instead of accepting the calibration, it once again told me that it was “updating” and not to test. I checked my instructional guides and didn’t find any reference to this. In my frustration, I sit tight and wait for this so-called update.

The pump finally tells me that the sensor is not functioning and to replace it. I blow air through pursed lips and install a brand new sensor. I get the typical message advising me that the warm-up may take up to two hours. It’s almost ten o’clock in the evening and my wife heads off to bed, wishing me good luck in getting my CGM working.

After the two hours, I provided two calibrations before having the damned thing tell me that the sensor isn’t working and to replace it. I’ll admit that I totally lost my shit and tore all of it out. I turned off the CGM option on my pump and installed a leftover FreeStyle Libre on my tricep. I made it to bed shortly after 1 o’clock in the morning with firm thoughts of telling CGM to go fuck itself. But I digress…

It just goes to show that issues with Diabetes aren’t limited to the body. The technology that’s meant to make our lives easier can very much be a problem as well. I have fourteen days on the current FreeStyle sensor, so I’m taking a break. Perhaps once I’ve had a break, I’ll return o it and try with a renewed sense of purpose. For now, it appears that my Diabetic journey towards becoming part machine has ground to a halt. ☯

Even When Your Hands Are Empty

There are certain styles of martial art that don’t always strike the observer as being something that would necessarily be effective on the street. And that makes sense, right? Think about something specific, like Kobudo. I’ve studied Kobudo on a rudimentary level, and although I love the fanciness and flourish of a traditional weapon, I would never study it BY ITSELF. The reason for this is quite simple: what if you found yourself without the weapon you trained yourself with?

The same can be said for a number of different arts. Some good examples include Kendo. How do you defend yourself if you’re not wielding a sword? Judo. How do you fight if you can’t get your hands on your opponent to throw them? Really, you can ask this question of many grappling and weapons-based martial arts. this is one of the reasons I enjoy and prefer the traditional, empty-hand fighting arts such as karate. Many, if not most styles not only teach the practitioner how to defend empty-handed, but they usually incorporate some weapons as well to ensure some familiarity.

One perfect example of this concept is a martial arts that has received some reasonably bad press in recent years, due to the very fact that it would likely be less than effective in a true combat situation on the street. I am referring, of course, to the Japanese art of Aikido.

Aikido was developed in the late 1920’s, early 1930’s by Morihei Ueshiba, who wanted to develop a grappling style of martial art that would allow a person to defend themselves using the opponent’s own momentum and energy, all while preventing serious injury to either party. His style was based on another Japanese form of grappling called Daito-Ryu, and incorporated Ueshiba’s core beliefs based on his following of an offshoot of the Shinto religion.

Aikido has received criticism from a number of different and popular sources, mostly because many feel that it lacks the appropriate training in areas that would make it effective in a real-life situation, such as striking and blocking. many have commented that unless your opponent is foolish enough to run straight at you in order to allow a fancy flip using their own momentum.

Granted, I can easily agree that if you put a boxer against someone who studies Aikido, you’d be faced with a situation of who will reach their goal first. If the boxer lands a hit, that’ll be it for the Aikido practitioner. If the Aikido practitioner manages to grapple and throw the boxer, the boxer will have very little in the way of a response to defend themselves. This is why, if you study a grappling art such as Aikido, you should incorporate a secondary style that incorporates striking and blocking as well.

Now, Aikido does include some rudimentary weapons training, but this is mostly as defence against such weapons as the staff, wooden sword and knife. On the whole, Aikido is mainly focused on grappling, throwing and wrist locks in order to redirect and control one’s opponent. It can be an extremely effective tool to be used in combat only IF you combine it with a traditional fighting art.

Even if I believe a person should only ever dedicate themselves to one art, I’m a big proponent of branching out so that a practitioner can experience various different perspectives on how best to defend themselves and others. Aikido is certainly a worthy style to examine if one is looking to do just that. Even if some of the criticisms are harsh, it’s important to make your own judgements. And the only way to do this is by finding your local Aikido school and giving it a shot. ☯

How Is It Snowing In July? ❄️

I’m not happy. Not. Happy. Ask me why… Go ahead, ask me! Here’s the thing: I had a pretty comprehensive post written up for today. It was controversial, hard-hitting and I cited a couple of sources. I had worked on it for over an hour, reviewing, editing and finally scheduling it to go live. Then, I had a change of heart. I thought about my post all afternoon after I had worked on it. Then I ultimately deleted it and we have this tawdry whining instead!

You see, I got to thinking about how my post would be interpreted by the folks who would read it, and I succumbed to a fear that many writers develop at one point or another. I was worried about who my opinion may offend or upset. In modern vernacular, I was worried about the wrath of the snowflakes!

Honestly, that concern should truly be the last on my mind. After all, I’ve often said that I don’t give a shit what other people think about me or my opinion. But it stands to reason that when you write a blog that you WANT to have people read and share, you try to provide content that will help keep the readers, not lose them. So once the thought crossed my mind that someone would be offended by today’s particular post, I deleted it without thinking. And now, I’m kicking myself in the ass. Because I compromised my writing in response to the possibility of someone else’s sensibilities.

Here’s the real kicker: the original post was ALL about how people in modern society get offended and insulted easily by EVERYTHING. As much as I regret that I didn’t just let the post ride, it’s also taught me an important lesson. Society as a whole has started to change and alter itself in order to conform with everyone else’s sensibilities. People who celebrate Christmas can no longer wish it upon others for fear that it will offend those who don’t celebrate it. Everyone has a gender of their own and become offended and insulted if you make a mistake in that regard (Did you just assume my gender???) A joke that would have otherwise been seen as a satirical way of approaching a sensitive topic is now seen as racist, prejudice, inappropriate or whatever… There’s no freedom of speech anymore.

The real joke behind it all is that snowflakes have caused the very thing that they’ve tried to stifle. People poke fun and make jokes at snowflakes’ expense more and more with every passing year. For the most part, people are having none of it. But every now and again, it almost feels as though the sense of entitlement and the reflex for being offended by everything just doesn’t seem to be worth the argument. ☯

On A Rainy Day ⛈

The only thing worse than having our movements restricted by current quarantine requirements, even if some of those have lessened, is being restricted even further by inclement weather. Considering the majority of my day gets spent in the sunny outdoors watering my lawn, tending my flowers and cycling, rainy days can throw a damper on my mood and my ability to follow my usual routine. It’s even worse for a restless five-year old boy who is used to coming and going from the backyard at his leisure.

My son Nathan is restless by nature, and is rarely satisfied with anything placed in front of him. He has a ton of toys, games and a small amount of electronics (not least of which is his own iPad) that he plays games and watches cartoons on. None of that prevents him from moving on from one thing to another almost without end, driving his mother and I insane in the process. So a rainy day with no school and no means of burning off energy outside can be burdensome to everyone in the household.

That’s where I decided to get creative and build a bird house with him. I called him downstairs on the promise of a fun surprise that would keep him busy for a while. He had received the materials to build a bird house as a Christmas gift, which I promptly hid away for fear that he wasn’t old enough to properly build it. My second fear is that he would likely damage or destroy some of the required parts, which is what he often seems to do with a lot of his toys.

The finished product, in all its glory!

He approached the wooden pieces with unconfined glee and started grabbing at everything in sight, including a small screwdriver and several small screws. I had to contain his eagerness long enough to explain that there were instructions to follow in order to properly build the bird house. I also explained that if he followed instructions and correctly assembled the project, that I would attempt to hang it outside his bedroom window so that he can watch birds come and go.

We worked diligently for almost an hour. One of us holding pieces of wood steady while the other one turned the screwdriver to fasten them together. It was tiring work for his tiny hands and he often relinquished the tightening of screws to me as he held the wooden pieces instead. But close to the end of that hour, we had assembled his small bird house and he quickly scooped it up to go show his mother and to keep it in his bedroom until we hung it up outside.

An angular view, showing how the pieces are bound to one another.

The only hiccup is that our bird house is plain, unfinished wood with no colour and Nathan insists that it needs to be painted. Further, the rod at the front for birds to stand on needs to be glued in place and we have no wood glue to work with. I promised that in the days to come, I would obtain glue and some bird seed to fill the little receptacle at the front. Then we can install a hook and suspend it from the overhang outside his window.

All in all, it didn’t kill off the entire afternoon but it kept Nathan busy for about an hour and has him pretty excited about the prospect of watching birds from his bedroom. It was a definite change from the usual things he would be stuck doing on a rainy day, like watching cartoons or grating on my nerves. Yet another example of how there is always something to be done. Sometimes it just takes a little imagination. ☯

I’ll Just Leave This Right Here…

I’m usually pretty loud and wordy, a trait that I’m quite confident I inherited from my mother. Although I usually have the ability to control my volume and she’s pure-blooded French-Acadian and for a gentle woman, her voice not only carries volumes, it never stops. ANYWAY… I sincerely love my mother, so don’t interpret the above-comment as something negative.

I simply bring this up because I realize that my posts can often become long and convoluted and can be quite the read. So today, I’m keeping it simple with the above illustration. I forget where I found it; it was a couple of week’s ago. But I think it carries an important message about controlling one’s emotions and maintaining self-control when faced with the obstacles of daily life. Enjoy! ☯

Don’t Be Rude!

Do you remember the last time someone was intentionally rude to you? How did it make you feel? Did you dwell on it? Did it sit on your mind for a period of time after the exchange was over? Maybe not. Perhaps you’re the type of person who has thick enough skin that other people’s comments simply slide right on off your shoulders. Or maybe you’re in denial. I don’t know, I’m not a therapist or psychologist. But I DO know that most people who say they aren’t affected by rudeness, still are.

To be rude is defined as being offensively impolite or ill-mannered. The best example that comes to mind is several months ago when I pulled out into traffic into the path of an oncoming vehicle (allegedly). The person took active steps to follow me to a red light and went on to call me by a plethora of inappropriate names and insult me for cutting him off. To this day, I can neither confirm nor deny that I ACTUALLY cut him off, as it’s not my nature to go pulling out into traffic if there’s a risk of a collision. But whether he pulled into my lane or was speeding or I DID cut him off, I can’t be responsible for other people’s perception.

So, why are people rude? Rudeness breeds suffering, the elimination of which is at the very heart of my beliefs, yet it seems that people do it with impunity. As much as we often don’t like to think so, many of us are rude to others in the way we interact with others, the things we say and the things we do. Sometimes this rudeness happens without our knowledge that we are doing it.

Most of us spend our childhood being taught by our parents (and grandparents) that’s it’s wrong to be rude, disrespectful even. But as we reach adulthood, a sense of entitlement often makes us disregard those teachings in relation to how we interact with others and how we treat them. Although none of this is anything new, it’s important to remember not to escalate the situation or reciprocate the behaviour.

A person’s behaviour, whether rude or not, will often be rooted in their own self-esteem and perspectives. That person who bumps into you in a public place without apologizing may be going through something that actively occupies their thoughts. There’s a good chance they weren’t even aware they bumped into you. The person who screams or swears at you in public for taking a parking space or possibly cutting them off in traffic has likely forgotten about you ten minutes later and the interaction isn’t worth the stress you allow yourself to feel as a result.

As difficult as it may be to smile and walk away sometimes, rudeness is one of those behaviours that feeds on itself. If you let someone’s rudeness get to you, you’ll likely be rude to someone else and so on and so forth. Kindness is the best reaction to rudeness and walking away from the situation is always best. Don’t contribute to the suffering in the world. Light knows, there’s enough of it as it is. After all, you can only control your own words and actions; never those of others. ☯

Lazy People Need Not Apply!

Laziness is insidious… Once it gets its greasy claws into a person, it can be pretty difficult to shake ’em off. There are ALL sorts of explanations for laziness, including psychological issues ranging from lack of self-esteem or fear of success, all the way to physical deficiencies that include lack of certain key vitamins like B vitamins, Vitamin D or certain mineral salts.

In the case of someone with Type-1 Diabetes, laziness takes on a whole new meaning. For some, it’s an unintentional result of how they deal with their condition. Fluctuating blood sugars, stress from treatment or lack of rest (since we never tend to sleep all that well) can contribute to feeling sluggish and lethargic. These feelings can often be contributed as laziness by the unaware, and it’s a label I faced often throughout my school years.

Years ago, way before the advent of frequent daily testing, carb counting and my trusty insulin pump, I would often suffer high blood glucose levels during the school day. Especially since lack of education made it so that I never assumed there was a problem with “sugar free” foods, despite their high carbohydrate count. I would often find myself sprawled on my desk, snoring softly as a teacher would walk over and crack a metre stick on my desk. Sometimes it wouldn’t even wake me. I wonder how much more I could have accomplished if I had better control of my levels, back then.

But every now and again, I would encounter someone who is genuinely lazy, for no medical reason, and simply chooses not to bother with their own care. I encountered such a woman over a decade ago. I was dating a woman whose mother had Type-1 Diabetes. She suffered from a leg discrepancy and was only in her early 50’s. We were at her home for a family meal the one night, when someone came in with a 2-litre bottle of soda. She immediately requested a large glass of the soda, to which I “helpfully” pointed out how much sugar it contained and asked when the last time she had tested her blood.

She laughed at me. In fact, the entire family joined in her laughter, as though the concept of testing her blood sugar was anathema in her household. I watched in horror as this woman quickly gulped down almost 50 grams of carbohydrates as though it was water, followed by a full meal. Whether she was using long-acting insulin injections or not was a mystery, but she certainly didn’t inject herself BEFORE the meal. If I consumed that many carbs without an insulin adjustment, my blood glucose levels would skyrocket dangerously (and I’m currently only in my 40’s).

Sadly, the woman in this story passed away just a couple of short years ago. I’ve wondered how much longer she could have lived, with better health and better quality of life, had she simply taken her self-care in hand and worked to keep control of her Diabetes. And this is the important takeaway: having Diabetes means you can’t afford to be lazy. There are too many fine details we need to pay attention to, including maintaining supplies, knowing what foods we’re eating and keeping a tight control of blood sugars and other complications.

I’ll admit that I’ve been guilty of waking up in the middle of the night to a pump with only a few units left and rolled over, content to change out my set once I woke up. Despite my best efforts, laziness hits me occasionally as well. But considering that someone with type-1 Diabetes already has a shortened life expectancy, it’s important to test blood sugars often, work out frequently and do your best to maintain your health. You not only owe it to yourself, but to your family. ☯

Step By Step, Day By Day…

I tend to harp on Diabetes a lot and complain about the many complications that accompany the disorder. And rightfully so, considering how many issues Diabetes can cause in one’s daily life. Just one day can be a chaotic turmoil of problems that can affect other areas of your life. Enter: last Saturday night…

I started Continuous Glucose Monitoring about a week and a half ago, in anticipation of turning on the Auto Mode on my new insulin pump. Auto mode is pretty sweet as it takes a lot of the guess work out of trying to keep blood sugars in range. Working in tandem with the CGM, auto mode tracks your blood sugars every five minutes and makes adjustments on that basis. If it sees that your blood sugars are starting to climb, it’ll increase your basal rate. If it’s starting to drop, it’ll reduce your basal rate or suspend your pump until you even out.

The reviews have been quite positive, considering this particular Medtronic pump has been in use in the United States for the past couple of years. The benefit has been that Canada has gotten to take advantage of their findings without suffering all the trial and error up here. The only active involvement on the user’s part, is the occasional finger prick throughout the day to calibrate the CGM and telling the pump how much carbohydrate they’re eating.

I feel it’s about as close to having an artificial pancreas as one can get, although I have no doubt that the next twenty years could yield some even better technologies. But Auto Mode does require a number of things. For one thing, you need to have a certain amount of sensor data accumulated before activating it. As previously mentioned, you also need to check your blood sugars through a traditional finger prick at least two to four times a day to calibrate the sensor, which is a pain in the ass.

Anyway, I’ve explained all the bell and whistles associated with my new pump before (Presenting, New Medtronic 670G), so you can click on the link for more info. But as with any new technology, there will ALWAYS be trial and error. And that’s what happened to me last Saturday. Let’s examine the timeline, shall we?

Monday, June 22nd: I attend the local MEDEC Centre for CGM and Auto Mode Training. MEDEC means Metabolic & Diabetes Education Centre. This is where I obtained all of my pump training and is also the office my Endocrinologist works out of. Once the training was completed, I was walked through the process of installing CGM and did so in the office, prior to my departure;

Tuesday, June 23rd: Less than 24 hours after first installing CGM, I removed it. Issues late in the previous evening caused a sensor error that couldn’t be corrected. It requested a second calibration and subsequently requested that I install a new sensor. My pump trainer was contacted and we discussed everything from possible scar tissue to simply having bad enough luck to have installed a faulty sensor. He also recommends installing a new one. My fears at letting a machine control my well-being are renewed and I stubbornly refuse to install a second CGM. Not today, SkyNet…

Wednesday, June 24th: After a full day of negotiating with myself, I decide to install a new sensor. I also did it while accompanied by my wife, since she would be the one who would need to apply the adhesives in the event I choose the back of my arm as a sensor site. I cycled a 60k with one of my friends the previous day, which I felt justified my not installing a new sensor right away. I’m pretty good at convincing myself…

Thursday, July 2nd: I’ve worn a sensor for a full week at this point and the pump is now requesting that I replace it. I marvel at the perks I’ve enjoyed during the week, including the pump suspending itself if I hit lows and spending much more time “in range” than I’m accustomed to. I feel somewhat better physically, but I’m absolutely exhausted, either by the hot weather mixed with thunder storms or because my body is finally staring to relax. Or maybe it’s the fact I’ve effectively cut out energy drinks (I say, as I compulsively scratch my forearms and rock back and forth);

Friday, July 3rd: This day taught me an important lesson. I started the morning by doing some intensive yard work in the sun. I followed it up by doing a MetaShred Workout and 30 minutes on the punching pad a little while later. Two workouts, two showers and extended time in the hot Sun taught me that sensor adhesives have a distinct limitation on how well they can stick to a grown man’s belly. In my hubris, I didn’t make a nice, smooth seal of adhesive all the way around the sensor. The result was water getting under the adhesive and drying/evaporating, which ultimately dried out the adhesive and caused the sensor to lift. It lost its footing in my flesh and popped out. One day into a new sensor and I’m forced to replace it because I rushed through the installation. Lesson learned…

Saturday, July 4th: When installing the new sensor last night, I took extra care in applying all the adhesive pads. I basically treated it something akin to putting a new diaper on my newborn, Alex. If I don’t ensure the edges are covered and the bands stick properly, he’ll introduce me to a new level of hell by spewing a volcanic jet of baby waste out the sides. So I essentially treated my sensor with the same amount of attention. And they say that you can’t learn anything from diaper changing! But it’s during the evening and overnight that the proverbial full diaper hit the fan…

  • 4:00 pm: My wife bakes a banana bread. My wife’s banana bread is my kryptonite! If I could sit with the pan in front of me and eat the entire thing, I would. Hence, the reason she cut the recipe down to a third of the sugar. A fact I was made aware of AFTER I bolused for my usual two pieces of bread;
  • 4:50 pm: My pump alarm goes off and suspends due to a low. I mention it to my wife and become aware of the lessened sugar content. I’m frustrated at the low but tickled pink that the pump is doing its job and I get to keep eating, so I cut myself two more pieces of banana bread. This was a mistake I would pay for later…;
  • 8:00 pm: The low and the accompanying correction I dealt with is followed up by my usual feeling of fatigue. My wife is also quite tired and we agree to go to sleep early after getting both kids to bed. I think to myself that I may ACTUALLY get a solid 8 hours’ sleep for a change. Then, I realize that my blood glucose is skyrocketing and a correction is necessary. It takes over an hour to finally fall asleep;
  • 3:10 am: I am awoken by a beeping I can’t identify. In my sleep-induced haze, I check my phone before realizing it’s coming from my pump. It tells me that it’s lost sensor signal and to move the pump closer to the sensor. I swear and mumble softly as to not awake my wife, since both items are tethered to my stomach. How much closer do they need to be??? But I had apparently rolled onto the sensor, which caused a problem. I decide to ignore it and allow the problem to correct itself. I go back to sleep;
  • 3:30 am: Damn it all to hell! I just manage to fall asleep and the pump starts blaring at me that it needs a calibration. Apparently, my timing was off and I should have tested right before bed. I decide to be lazy and press the pump’s “snooze” option;
  • 4:30 am: The pump once again tells me to get up and calibrate via finger prick. I give my pump the proverbial middle finger and hit the snooze button again…;
  • 5:30 am: GET UP AND CALIBRATE YOUR DAMN PUMP, SHAWN!!!! Fuck you, pump! You’re not the boss of me! I’ll do as I damn well please… (as I get up, walk downstairs to my office and test my blood sugar) I curl back up into my blankets, give my pump a last cursory glance to ensure no issues. Blood sugar is normalizing and I feel my eyelids getting heavy. I go back to sleep;
  • 6:30 am (roughly): Baby Alex starts crying as he realizes that its morning and he considers it a firm injustice that we have the temerity to leave him in his crib. My eyes pop open with the cartoon sound of smashing glass and I fight off the urge to start weeping. My wife, who is the ultimate champion of our household, musters from her slumber and rescues the baby from the torture chamber that is his crib;
  • 8:30 am: I awake to the dulcet sounds of Joe Satriani’s Always With Me, Always With You for only the second time in many months, since I usually awake before my alarm goes off. I step away from the bed with an accumulated two or three hours’ of sleep. My wife made coffee. She rules.

Lovely, eh? The life of a Type-1 Diabetic is sprinkled with these lovely days of difficulty and lack of rest. I’m confident that once I get used to it and the Auto Mode is in full swing, I’ll feel better about it and things will get easier. When I first started the pump, I had all sorts of difficulties and there were days I was ready to chuck it out the window. But I couldn’t imagine life without an insulin pump, now. As long as my patience holds out and I stick with it, Auto Mode may just be the ticket to getting my Hemoglobin A1C’s below 7.0, for the first time in over a decade. Here’s hoping… ☯