Category: Motivation

It’s Difficult To Find A Balance

We often try to find that easy balance in life. Get a job, find someone and get married, have children and build a family… Sometimes, it’s easy to keep our heads down and just follow the status quo.

Despite the expectations that life and society have for us, it’s often extremely difficult to strike a balance, especially in today’s world. Constant health and financial difficulty can take its toll on a person and make life more difficult than necessary.

Survival is the most primal of human instincts, and very few people (unless affected by some other issue) will simply sit back and let the proverbial house of cards crumble. And survival truly is a motherf&*ker… Our will to keep on fighting often outweighs our common sense.

There are a lot of things that can go wrong with life. But as long as you keep pushing through it and fighting your best effort, you’ll always be able to add another card to the house; making it stronger and more stable. ☯

A Little Perspective And Motivation Go A Long Way…

When people make goals, they usually include winning. This also usually means coming in first place in whatever one does. But as I’ve often said, life rarely cares about our plans and won’t allow for first place victories in most instances.

In fact, if you look up the definition for most synonymous words, such as victory, triumph and winning, you’ll notice that none of them say ANYTHING about coming in first. They are simply defined as accomplishments or achievements with certain goals you may have set for yourself.

We don’t always fully appreciate what we achieve. Most of the time, we become disappointed at the prospect of coming in second or third. Look at the image I’ve included in this post… Notice how the child in third place seems happiest? Why do you think that is? Why wouldn’t the child in first place be as exuberant? You would think the kid in first place would be happier.

Perhaps the child in third place understands that victory isn’t an absolute and that you can win without being in first place. This a bit like what I’ve written about previously, in regards to the fact that sometimes the only way to win is to lose. Or maybe the kid in third place is just weird like I was…

Focus on the goal, not on the multiple tasks required to reach that goal. And always remember that sometimes, being happy with what you get is a better alternative than beating yourself up for not getting the gold medal. ☯

We All Wear Masks…

“We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our skin.” – André Berthiaume

Who are you? Do you know for certain? We go through life wearing masks that are expected of us. We wear costumes. Don’t believe me? Think about it… Regardless of what job you do, you generally wear a costume. Either a uniform, or even a shirt and tie… One way or another, we alter our appearance and usually our identities in order to conform to the outside world.

Even when we have the job of our dreams or our choice career, who we are “out there” is never the same as who we are at home. And why is that? Is it because we’re afraid of what others would think of us? Are we afraid of showing the world who we truly are? Or perhaps our jobs simply don’t allow us to wear our favourite sweat pants and batman shirt at work…

Everyone has their own unique way of facing the world, but it’s often been said that as a people, we wear three masks. The first mask is the one that everyone sees. This is the one that people recognize us as. As a general rule, it is the most artificial and the one that has the most layers. We usually try and adapt to what’s in front of us; work, social gatherings and interactions.

The second mask is the one we wear around close friends and family. Yes, it is true that we wear a mask and adapt ourselves even when dealing with friends and family. Although not QUITE as complex or complicated, it still tends to hide the very essence of who we truly are. think back to meeting your in-laws, and how you tried to be “on your best behaviour.”

The third mask is the real you. The one you never show to anyone else. Or at the very least, to an extremely select few. This is where you break out the sweatpants and the binge watching Friends on Netflix kind of thing. The one with the fewest layers and the one that leaves you exposed the most.

The question is: who do you show your third mask to? Do you have that person in your life? Most importantly, do you lift that third mask and expose yourself completely? If you have that person in your life, you are truly rich and blessed.

Be mindful of the masks you wear. We live in a society of conformity and sometimes we have to adapt. That goes without saying. But while you’re busy adapting, be mindful of how well you wear those masks. As Patrick Rothfuss once wrote, “We understand how dangerous a mask can be. We all become what we pretend to be.” Be sure to be true to yourself. Don’t let the mask become who your are. ☯

The Cover Of A Book Doesn’t Tell Its Story…

I’ve been studying Buddhism in some way, shape or form since the mid-1990’s. I’ve learned a number of fascinating things, and not all of them theological. I’ve sometimes been asked why I don’t look like I’m Buddhist. And I find myself asking, what exactly does a Buddhist look like?

I’ve had some people who believe that it’s all shaved heads and constant humming and meditating. Although that is a part of it, for some sects, it isn’t all of it. Although I believe in trying to live a minimalist lifestyle and I do meditate frequently, I am much like anyone else.

I am a complex and complicated person and I am subject to all the same difficulties and emotions that everyone else may experience. A friend reminded me today that it’s normal to feel anger and frustration, so long as I don’t live within those emotions and allow them to take control over my life.

I think that this is the same with anyone’s faith or beliefs. Although we may have grown up with them, had them taught to us or discovered them later in life, it makes them no less important. But much like any other faith, it doesn’t mean I’m bound by every stipulation of the faith I study.

It’s reminiscent of how some Catholic sects believe in attending mass on Sundays and avoiding meat on Fridays, but it sure didn’t stop members of my family from sleeping in on Sundays. And it sure didn’t stop my grandmother from enjoying a barbecued steak on Fridays. But it makes her no less Catholic.

Your faith and your beliefs are part of who you are, but don’t let yourself get bogged down by specifics. Sometimes you have to simply, as they say, go with the flow and let it happen. Having faith is sometimes just knowing you’re faithful. ☯

Sometimes, Laziness Is A Good Thing…

You know, it’s been a long week. I painted and renovated our upstairs bathroom, laid flooring in the downstairs bathroom, eliminated a bunch of stuff we were no longer using and loads of weeds pulled in the yard and laundry.

I usually have a great deal of difficulty sitting still, and any of my coworkers and my family would concur with that. Between my annoying need to keep moving and always be doing SOMETHING and my compulsive need to clean, a day where I simply sit back and relax is usually quite rare.

I had just such a day today. Today is a civic holiday in Saskatchewan, meaning that most people had the day off. I started my day the way I usually do; with a healthy dose of caffeine to supplement the fact that my son woke me up far earlier than I planned on getting up.

A light breakfast and a few dishes later, I found myself sitting in a comfortable rocker watching some television. No chores, no errands… Then, the whole family partook of a short nap. After a short respite, we decided to take our son Nathan to a splash park to get some fun in the sun and play in the water.

We spent the better part of almost two hours playing in the sun. It was quite warm out today, and Nathan had an absolute blast until he managed to hurt himself and decided he wanted to go home.

Once we got home and were shielded from the sun, we all cooled down and had another bite to eat. This was followed by another nap. Now that we’re all fed and refreshed, I’m currently typing and my son is playing with a Uno deck on the floor. Although “playing” may be a very loose term; he’s mostly scattering the cards all over the floor.

Not exactly an exciting day, right? Was this a lazy day? A wasted day? What do you think? Realistically, in today’s busy world of non-stop hustle and bustle, a lazy day where one does nothing is often needed in order to reset your clock and get proper rest. This is almost as important as getting a full night’s sleep or meditating regularly. ☯

As The World Turns…

The world is an ever-changing organism. We often don’t see the world in its entirety as a living thing, but it really is. I often get a laugh out of people who say “some things never change…” Despite this perspective, everything can and in fact, does change.

I was out running errands this afternoon. As I exited one of the businesses, I saw a man walking towards his car. I saw him look down at the ground and squint a little before shrugging his shoulders and carrying on.

As I walked passed the spot where the man looked down, I saw a dime on the ground. That’s it. A dime. I knelt down and picked up the dime and added it to my pocket change. Money is money, right? But it made me wonder why someone would simply shrug off money, despite its denomination. Was it not worth the man’s time? Was it “too small” an amount?

It got me to thinking about the value of money and how things have evolved since my childhood. As a child, I remember my father always checking the change slot in pay phones for returned coins that people may have overlooked. He always said that even a penny counts fro something, especially once you accumulate enough of them.

We live in a society that is centred on the accumulation of wealth and possessions. But truly, it’s amazing how little one can live with and still be happy. Some people believe that less belongings means less problems. Less attachment means less anxiety and stress. Maybe it’s true. Who am I to say?

But I think it speaks volumes that we have evolved to the state where we ignore money on the ground, simply because it’s so small an amount. Sure, I’ve become like a lot of adults who compare their youths to current standards. When I was a teenager, I could grab the latest Superman coming book, along with a bag of chips and a diet soda for less than five dollars. Depending on where I would shop, I’d be lucky to get JUST the coming book for that same amount today.

The lesson here is that you should value what you have, as the increasing cost of life makes EVERYTHING more valuable. Although one shouldn’t centre one’s life on the acquisition of belongings, recognizing the importance of what you have outweighs the cost of said item. ☯

Channel Your Inner Vila…

I remember sitting through many an episode of “This Old House” when I was a kid. My father loved the show, despite having never lifted a tool in his life. I guess it’s a bit like watching wrestling or boxing and never being in a fight.

I absolutely despised home improvement shows at that age, as any kid would. If I’m being honest, I was way more partial to Star Trek, Star Wars or Lost In Space.

I’m a little behind on getting some writing done. Yesterday morning started like any other day. I went into work, then came home to take my son outside to get him out of his mother’s hair. Usually that only includes keeping him busy until lunchtime so she can work, but yesterday I decided to take a drive to Home Depot.

Home Depot is an evil place, because they’re really good at making you believe that you can fix or build ANYTHING. I went in to buy some caulking for my upstairs bathtub, and ended up leaving with flooring, caulking, paint and tools.

What started as a quick shopping visit ended with redoing the bathroom floors and painting all the walls and floorboards. I worked diligently from about ten in the morning yesterday and finished just shortly after lunch this morning. Needless to say, I’m exhausted and I could never do home improvement for a living.

In order to turn my bragging about my renovating prowess into something that qualifies as content for this blog, I should mention my blood sugar levels. I spent almost 36 hours running low.

The idea is that many hours of consistent work tends to make my blood sugar levels drop. It’s not like anything I was doing was intensely rigorous, but even light work stretched over long hours without stopping will have an adverse effect.

I passed out hard last night, after eating reasonable amounts of glucose. When I got back at it this morning, I watched my levels a bit more carefully. It didn’t help that I painted the baseboards outside, with the summer heated quickly rounding the corner on 30 degrees, causing some mild dehydration and blood sugar drops.

This is just another example of how just about EVERYTHING affects you when you have Type 1 Diabetes. It’s important to take this into consideration when doing any sort of activity, especially in the high heat of summer. Drink plenty of fluids and stay hydrated, and test your blood often. ☯

The Spoken Word Is A Lost Art

Technology has come a long way, even in the past ten years. Current trends and social expectations have caused a shift in how we communicate and interact with each other.

Although the jury is out on when it all started, some researchers believe that human beings started communicating with each using vocalization as far back as two million years ago and as early as 50,000 years ago. There’s a great article written by sciencemag.org that covers some of this and goes on to explain how the spoken word may have contributed to our ability to develop hunting weapons and tools during our ancestral times. Here’s the article if you want to give it a read: https://www.sciencemag.org/news/2015/01/human-language-may-have-evolved-help-our-ancestors-make-tools

I remember being in my teens and sitting in a small group at a local fast-food restaurant. We’d get food and sit there for hours, just chatting, laughing and shooting the proverbial s&*t. We’d sometimes get booted for being too loud, but we had an active and productive interaction with each other. These days, seeing a small group of teenagers together involves a whole lot of silence and everyone staring down at their phones. Sometimes you can even catch some of them texting each other from across the table! I use teenagers as an example, but adults are often just as bad.

Dating and romantic interactions certainly used to be a vocal skill. I used to remember that if I had interest in a particular person, I had to grow the testicular fortitude to walk up to them and say hi; a bit of chit-chat or small talk before asking if they’d like to grab coffee or go to dinner. These days? Swipe right (Or is it left? I’ve never used Tinder). Making certain your profile “looks good” has replaced showering, getting dressed and going out to meet people in person.

In fact, in many different respects, approaching people in public has almost become taboo. If you walk up to someone and tell them you find them attractive, it will be a coin toss as to whether they smile and sit to coffee or if they slap your face and call you a creep (And no, before anyone gets smart with me, I’m not speaking from personal experience!)

Applying for jobs, ordering everything from furniture to food and even communicating with far away friends and family have all started happening through technology instead of walking into a place of business in person or picking up the phone to actually speak.

I remember just a few years ago, I was working with a younger guy who spent a great deal of his shift on his smart device. It never interfered with his duties, but he usually had it out. He started using this app where you use a spoken message, send it and a few moments later the person you’re speaking to would send a vocal reply.

At one point while he was using the app, he tells me (while holding a cell phone in his hand, no less) “Do you know what would be cool? If they made this app where you’d have an open line to talk and the person on the other end could talk as well, without having to send the individual messages…” I replied, “They already invented that, it’s called a telephone…” I got a lost look of confusion as though I had grown a second head.

Although you need to know your audience and be mindful of your environment, there’s nothing wrong with smiling and saying hi to someone. Don’t be afraid to interact with humanity in person. You were taught how to speak long before you learned to tap a device screen, and humans have the unique benefit of using language as a primary communication tool. So embrace that uniqueness. ☯

Being Plain Is Fine; After All, Vanilla Still Has Flavour…

We live in a society unfortunately obsessed with appearance; our clothing, our physical appearance and our environment, which usually include what possessions we may own, affect us and motivate us in our daily lives.

But is there anything inherently wrong with being plain? In a world obsessed with how it looks, is your life any less important if your bedsheets are plain old sheets from your local retail shop or 1800 thread-count Egyptian cotton from a specialty store? (Don’t ask me how I know about thread count…)

The question stems from a comment I recently received through my blog, two days ago. Of course, the comment was blocked by the spam filter and appeared to come from some a weird retailer’s address, but the comment was sound and got me thinking.

The commenter indicated the belief that “The Blogging Buddhist” is a little plain and that I should develop my titles to be catchier and attract more readers. He also indicated that my content was “good”, but referred me to other news sites to see what colours and details they add to attract more readers.

I was a little taken aback by this comment, and I guess as usual I need to take it with grain of salt as everyone will ultimately have their own opinion. I usually try to create a title that will draw readers and sometimes add a small element of comedy as well (see title of this post).

I’ve always thought that by keeping this as simple and uncluttered as possible, it would make it easier for readers to focus on the actual content and not the pretty colours. Was I wrong?

I know some of you out there are actively reading my posts and I’d like to hear from you. When I started this blog, I put out some feelers asking readers to suggest content they’d like to see me research and write about. Now, I’d like to get people’s opinion on the look of this blog. Leave a comment or click on the “contact” link on the Home banner to reach out to me directly.

Growth only comes with change, and it is often necessary to make that change. I’m nothing if not willing to hear what others have to say, so don’t be shy! ☯

How Life Should Be…

You know, it’s often been said that we’re here to teach and guide the next generation and show them the right path. But parents often forget that our children are little people too, and they have a great deal to teach us.

At only four years of age, my son Nathan often amazes me with the things he does. Of course, he often frustrates, angers me and destroys everything I own, but it wouldn’t be growth otherwise, right?

Yesterday, My wife and I brought Nathan to a local park. As soon as he arrived, he immediately made friends with all the children there. And that’s usually his way. Incredibly it doesn’t matter where we go or what children are there, he always manages to make friends everywhere he goes.

Nathan (with the beige hat), playing with two boys he had just met

I think there’s an important lesson to learn from this. As we grow into adulthood, we move away from our ability to befriend people in general. We develop cliques, join specific groups and (sometimes unintentionally) segregate ourselves from certain environments.

My son will walk into a group of children and automatically take to them, regardless of age, race, ethnicity or gender. His willingness to play and enjoy life side-by-side with anyone he meets is genuinely amazing and is how we should all behave.

What would the world be like if we approached our own societies this way? Imagine if warring states could walk towards each other and just become friends? All the wars and conflicts that could be avoided? How much better would our society be?

We can learn a lot from our children. In some ways, they’re very much like a blank slate that hasn’t been sullied by runny paint. Some of their ways before becoming influenced is what we, as adults should aspire to be. ☯