It can sometimes be easy to forget that all jobs in modern society are necessary, especially when some of those jobs are ones that we would generally prefer not to do. For example, I think we could agree that the average kid usually doesn’t say they want to be a garbage collector when they grow up. But without people to DO that job, imagine the mess and inconvenience we’d be in? It’s lucky for us that there are folks who are not only willing but able and happy to do these jobs so that we don’t have to find out. But it would be nice to see some appreciation, as well.
Through my late teens and most of my twenties, I paid off student loans and made my money by working at a local fast-food restaurant. For obvious legal reasons, I’d rather not name the restaurant but it usually has arches up front, if that gives you any indication. I lost count of the number of people who commented negatively about my working there and belittled the job as a whole. Although i can admit that it was by no means a “glamorous” job, it taught independence, skills, the value of hard work and introduced me to the world of management that has eventually led me to the hear and now.
Some years later, I held a job as a janitor. I swept and mopped floors, emptied trash receptacles and washed windows. Most people in the building wearing suits and carrying briefcases would walk past me without ever noticing me, despite my occasional smile or wave. I was “beneath” them. But this job taught me attention to detail, perseverance and the importance of cleanliness. And it would have been interesting to see the results of my team and I not cleaning their building for an extended period of time.
I guess one could easily say that I’ve done a bit of everything, and I’ve always believed that each and every different job I’ve held has taught me something, provided me with something and has helped make me a better person. This is why it seriously bothers me when I hear someone say something along the lines of, “If you don’t study hard and get a degree, you’ll end up like THAT…” As though any given job they name doesn’t have value and worth. Some of that is based on modern society’s belief in accomplishing BIG things. But what’s big? Sometimes it’s simply a matter of perspective.
“Flipping Burgers Is Not Beneath Your Dignity. Your Grandparents Had a Different Word For Burger Flipping – They Called It Opportunity.”
– Bill Gates
No matter what you do in life, so long as you give it your all and do the best you can at what you’re doing you’ll always find its value. Nothing is beneath you, and no one should ever belittle you for what you do. And should you happen to be the one doing the belittling, shame on you. If you’ve never been below your current station in life, at least understand that every job is essential and pertinent to your existence; even a job you’d prefer not to be doing yourself. And lastly, money isn’t everything. There are plenty of sources that have proven that if you do what you love, the money will come. Unless what you love is sitting on your couch eating nachos. Then, I can’t help you. ☯
Sometimes life can be difficult to navigate and things always seem darkest before the dawn. I’ve had my fair share of difficulties in the past few years, and not all of them related to COVID-19. But if you take the time to slow down and pay attention, there can be some nuggets of golden wisdom among the dust. I recently reconnected with a friend from my childhood and he posted something that resonated with me. As a result, I’ve decided to share it here.
I wasn’t able to track the source of where he got it, and I’ll be translating it from French, but the message should be pretty clear. We often take things for granted and especially when things are rough, we ignore the good things in life altogether. With that thought in mind, I present for your consideration, 10 signs that things in life are actually going well:
You Have A Roof Over Your Head: It’s appropriate that this one is first on the list. A safe home to live in is something that not everyone has the benefit of having. I can admit that even I have often taken going home at the end of the day for granted;
You Have Food In Your Stomach: Next to having shelter, an empty stomach is a problem faced by more and more people. One wouldn’t think this would be a problem in modern society, but it is;
You Have A Heartbeat: This one resonates most with me, because my brother and I have fought against health issues for our entire lives. The bottom line is that if you’re still alive, you can still fight the good fight;
You Have Water: Hydration is the key to life. I’m sure you’ve all heard that you’ll live longer without food than you will without water. And that’s pretty accurate. Not everyone has access to clean drinking water;
You Have Access To Personal Hygiene: Right up there with the previous four points, self-cleanliness is often taken for granted but provides so many benefits in one’s life BESIDES smelling nice…;
You Have Friends And Loved Ones: There’s nothing worse than going through this life alone. Even people who claim to be loners will usually yearn for companionship now and again, so just imagine how lonely it is when you have no one in your life;
People Love You: Okay, so this one kind of goes hand in hand with the previous point. But the lesson here is that the people in your life love you, and that’s not to be taken for granted;
You’re Doing Your Best: This one is pretty subjective, but as long as you’re doing your best at whatever you do in your life, you’re doing okay. Trying and failing doesn’t make life tragic. Trying, failing and refusing to try again is the problem;
You Have Clean Clothing: It’s one thing to be clean yourself, but being dressed in clean, properly-fitting clothes is not just a matter of image but a matter of health and wellbeing;
You’re Still Breathing: I once read somewhere that if you want a simple test to know if you’ve completed all the challenges in life, it’s this: if you’re still alive, you haven’t. No matter what comes at you, always remember that you’re still breathing. You’re still alive. And as long as you’re still alive, there’s always hope.
I look at this nifty little list and I recognize that I’m blessed with all ten of those points. I have a home, a family, food in my belly and clothes on my back. I know my family loves me and have a great support system. And despite everything I’ve been through in recent years, I’m still breathing. I’m still here. It’s important not to take any of it for granted. Not everyone has the benefit of everything listed here. ☯
My wife and I are both avid readers, with thousands of books lining the east wall of our home’s living room. Lately, I can’t even be sure who’s coming out ahead on the number of volumes read, since I’m currently reading Robert Jordan’s the Wheel of Time series for the third or fourth time and it’s a large, 14-volume series with about 600 to 700 pages per volume. It makes for pretty long reading, especially with children in the house as a distraction. And no, my 6-year old doesn’t sit still for books, before anyone suggests that.
Anyway, I recently started taking public transit to get to work and since it’s about a 20 minute bus ride, a friend of mine recommended that I use that time to read. Although I’m inclined to agree that this is a better option than sitting idle or crying on the bus, I was faced with the prospect that I carry a pretty full briefcase and didn’t have room for the collector’s edition volumes of Jordan’s books. Even the average pocket book wouldn’t have much space allowed in what I currently carry.
My friend decided to be a smart ass and said, “There’s an app for that,” referencing my post where I wrote about the various fitness and health apps I use. You can read THAT post here. But then e-readers were brought up and I remembered that not only am I a big fan of e-readers but I have one of my own. And weighing at only a couple of ounces and thin as a wafer, I could easily slip it among the other items in my duty bag. Problem solved.
Me, with my e-reader. I look like Powder!
A modern solution to a small problem. I don’t know if I would necessarily say that not having something to read on the bus is inherently a problem, per say. But it’s nice to have the option. This damn thing is so small that I occasionally forget that I have it. And to the friend who reminded me, thanks for the recommendation. It definitely takes the boredom out of the bus ride. ☯
I had a strange incident happen to me at my local corner store a while back. I’ve always been the type of person who covers up his debit machine PIN pad when entering my PIN number. This is something that everyone should do. If you don’t, I highly recommend that you do. Having a random person obtain your PIN number can lead to a host of financial and identity theft issues that you’ll find yourself having to deal with. Not to mention that they’ll likely drain your accounts. But anyway, on with the story.
Even before the pandemic started, I’ve always been a fan of maintaining a reasonable distance form other people. There’s a variety of reasons behind this, including my chosen profession making me somewhat paranoid. But health and hygiene issues have always been a consideration, as well as the security surrounding when one is at a cash register. I’ve often found myself asking folks to take a step back, with chosen replies including “no problem,” all the way up to “go fuck yourself.” Some people just like to watch the world burn.
On this particular day, I was at my local convenience store, checking my weekly lottery ticket in the hopes I had a winner and purchasing a few days’ worth of energy drinks. Since I hadn’t won the lottery (imagine that) I asked for the next ticket and placed my energy drinks on the cashier’s counter. While I was doing this, a tall, scruffy-haired guy saunters up next to me with a slurpee and asks for a certain type of chicken wing they had in a warming display. The cashier asked him to wait a moment as she was currently finishing my transaction.
Not only did he seemed annoyed at having to wait, but he approached the cashier’s counter as well and kind of floated into my comfort zone. The guy, I’ll call him Scruffy Bastard, was close enough that I could smell his mixture of unwashed flesh mixed with cheap aftershave. I knew I was done and on my way out, so I didn’t bother to ask him to step back while I punched in my payment on the debit machine. I did, however, cover the key pad with my hand as I entered my PIN and turned my shoulder towards him. This is the exchange that ensued:
Scruffy Bastard: You worried I’m gonna steal your number on you? ME: Excuse me? SB: You’re hugging that thing like you’re worried I’m gonna grab it from you. You worried about me, or something?
At this point, I thought maybe he was just joking around. It can be especially hard these days, since everyone’s face is covered up and one can’t get a read on other people’s facial expressions. In the interest of avoiding an unnecessary conflict, I kept my response polite and mild.
ME: Nope, just being safe and protecting my PIN number… SB: Funny you should do that as I walk up. Are you trying to say I look like someone who would try to steal it? ME: (now realizing he was actually annoyed and not joking) No, sir. I’m not suggesting anything. It’s simply a habit to ensure the safety of my PIN number. It’s something EVERYONE should do. SB: So, you do that everywhere you shop? With everybody who stands behind you? ME: Yes, sir. SB: Seems rude. As you can see, some people might take it offensively, as though you’re accusing them of being dishonest. ME: Honestly, that’s not my intention. But I’d rather someone think that I find them dishonest than have my bank accounts hacked but someone who WOULD copy my number. I’m not accusing you, but I certainly don’t know you. And my security and safety isn’t something that should offend you.
I grabbed my stuff and walked out. I was leery for the few moments it took me to load my cans into my car and hop in to drive away, as I was confident based on Scruffy Bastard’s body language that would potentially come outside to confront me further. Then I remembered he was purchasing items the cashier had to get for him and it gave me the time to make my way out of the parking lot. I abhor fighting and I’m just as glad I didn’t have to find out if he wanted a further confrontation.
When it comes to protecting one’s interests, you can never be too careful. But I’d be lying if I said it isn’t very entertaining (and just a little bit sad) seeing people’s reaction to someone taking protective steps. The worst part is people like Scruffy Bastard would be the first to raise hell if they had their identities stolen or their accounts hacked. It’s surprising how many people get frustrated and angry at certain protective steps that are taken in their interest. But the Light help those same people when something happens BECAUSE they didn’t embrace those protective steps.
Maybe Scruffy Bastard was taking in too much sugar from the slurpee he was drinking. Who knows? Like most encounters of this sort (and I’ve had more than I care to admit) it left me with a small knot in my gut, wondering why someone would choose this kind of approach with a total stranger. For all I know, maybe he HAS been accused of something in the past and this is why he reacts this way. All I DO know is that like the old saying goes, I can only control my words and actions. Not how others react to them. ☯
I’ve always said that inspiration comes from the most unlikely places. Based on today’s title, one could say I’m definitely reaching both extremes. Confucius is well and widely known for his philosophy and is responsible for the way of life known as Confucianism. Clark Kent is, well… Superman. Although a fictional character, inspirational quotes and knowledge have often come from such sources, albeit never credited to the writers who actually created the script. But I digress… My point is that both these sources have used a quote that I’ve been pondering of late.
“It May Be Easier To Hate, But It’s Stronger To Love”
– Clark Kent, Smallville Finale
Although I had firmly stepped away from social media in all its forms about three years ago, I’ve been allowing myself a soft return to the uncontrolled arena. This seemed like a natural next step to help share this blog, as platforms like FaceBook allow sharing on a broader scope than simply hoping people will like and follow directly from the blog, and my YouTube channel allows me to provide some “in person” perspectives on certain topics that don’t require me to cite sources or quotes.
For the most part, it’s been reasonable. I’ve even managed to make contact and reconnect with some people I haven’t spoken to since high school, which has been motivation enough for me to actually spend time on my personal accounts as opposed to interacting solely as The Blogging Buddhist. In recent weeks, I’ve come to notice a trend of negativity from a select few that I’ve known as friends for some years. As many of you are aware, the elimination of all forms of suffering is kind of my thing and negativity is very much a means of causing further suffering in the world.
The big problem is that despite being consistently negative and more often than not, spreading hatred, these select few don’t necessarily seem to be aware of it. But the effect is palpable. When you log into a social media platform and realize that every little thing a person posts is calling out, complaining, hating or boycotting something, it begins to weigh on you. Even when the topic of the post may not be about you. Negativity breeds negativity, and the more someone feeds negative energy into the world, the more it will negatively impact the people around them. It usually doesn’t matter if that negative energy was MEANT for a good purpose.
I found an article posted by the Psychology Spot that explains that psychologist from Harvard University concluded that “negative emotions are like the flu: the more friends you have that have the flu, the greater the chances of getting infected, the same applies to sadness and despair.” It’s pretty hard to disagree with that, when you can be in a perfectly good mood only to be brought down or “bummed out” by the simple act of someone else’s constant negativity. Negative energy is infectious and spreads like a virus.
“It Is Easy To Hate And It Is Difficult To Love.”
– Confucius
It can be difficult to be around such people when they breed negative energy on a constant basis. It’s even more difficult when they refuse to acknowledge or recognize their negative behaviour and consider it a personal attack on them when it’s brought up. I was the recipient of just such an attack recently, when a long time friend took my attempt at discussing an issue as a personal attack and began berating me for bringing it up. I didn’t necessarily oppose this person’s view, I was simply trying to offer up a perspective to help this person understand why the anger and hatred wasn’t necessary. The unfortunate side effect was damage to a long-standing friendship that could have been avoided.
So what is one to do about such situations? Block or unfriend such people? Delete all social media once again? It can be rough waters to navigate, but my main concern is wondering what’s gone so wrong in these peoples’ lives that cause them to be in a constant state of anger and hatred. Setting aside for a moment the fact that I’m a firm advocate of the “scroll on by” theory, where if one disapproves or is unhappy with something posted online they should feel free to simply scroll on by as opposed to becoming an armchair warrior and try to argue the point. But the reality is that if/when someone posts something on a social media platform, it needs to be understood that they’re inviting and even welcoming comments and discussion. If one does not want comments and discussion on a particular topic they post about, then the simple truth is that they should not.
Obviously, this is all opinion-based and it can be difficult to discern where the line is between one’s opinion and common sense. But there seems to be a growing trend of people constantly using social media platforms to spread their anger, hate and misinformed opinions. In both my personal and professional life, I’ve always considered it of the utmost importance to get the full story before taking action or speaking out against someone/something. But misinformation aside, the physiological and psychological effect that a constant state of anger and hatred has on one’s own body is measurable. The effects it has on those around can also be noted.
There are always battles to be fought. Such is the world we live in. But knowing how to pick your battles and being reasonable and level-headed about them are of paramount importance. Especially when it may lead to suffering and loss. As for myself, it’s given me a significant wake up call in regards to navigate the world of social media. I’m once again on the fence as to whether I’ll close up shop and walk away or if I’ll weather the storm and simply filter out the bad. Time will tell. ☯
Do any of you remember what certain things cost during your childhood? I remember SOME of them, and the difference is shocking. A lot of schools used to have that assignment where you had to figure out how much certain cost for our parents as opposed to what they cost now. I don’t know if they still do this, but it was pretty shocking to see the difference. It’s definitely something that today’s youth should recognize as it might curb some young peoples’ tendency to take their possessions and resources for granted.
For example, gas only cost 59 cents per litre when I was in high school, as opposed to the current 121 cents per litre in Saskatchewan. Car fuel is always an easy way to compare the increase in price of things, as it has consistently risen for decades, despite some mild back and forth. Another good example is bread, which only cost about 90 cents back in New Brunswick when I was growing up. This is compared to the fact that a loaf of bread is almost 3 dollars at today’s prices.
I remember my grandfather and father telling me stories during my childhood about how “in my day, things only cost THIS much…” I never thought I’d find myself in the same ballpark as them, but I’ve found myself using that very line in recent years. For example, some find it shocking when I mention that I’d get a weekly allowance of only 5 dollars when I was a kid. But the reality is that for 5 dollars, saved over three or four weeks, I could go to my local convenience store and pick up the latest Superman and Spider-Man titles, as well as indulging in a bag of chips and a sugar-free soda and have money left over. Not to mention that the original Infinity Gauntlet, Infinity War and Infinity Crusade comic arcs came out in early 90’s before the MCU came along and altered a whole bunch of shit about the storyline. But I digress…
My point is, inflation has made a person’s dollar more important than ever. And it’s all the more important to make every dollar count. That’s why it becomes important to take advantage of certain opportunities that present themselves. Talking about finance on my blog isn’t usually my “thang,” but I got to thinking about some of this stuff. Here are my top opportunities to save a few bucks when out and about.
Free Samples: The pandemic has eliminated this opportunity, but I’m hoping that there will eventually be a return to the practice. Going to Costco on an empty stomach was always easy when your could walk the store and sample meats, granola bars and cereals as you walk around. You’d essentially be full by the time you reached the cash register. Top it off with a sample of juice along the way and if you still find yourself hungry, grabbing a $1.50 hot dog on the way out is guaranteed to put you over the top; especially given the size of Costco hot dogs. Although this is the more prominent location for trying free samples, a lot of retail locations offer samples and allow you the opportunity to lessen the sting of one’s overall shopping bill. Too short term or in the moment? Alright, then. On to the next one…;
Using Coupons: If you had told me ten years ago that I’d be saving and/or using coupons, I’d have called you hilarious (or an idiot). I happen to hate flyers and junk mail, but if you’re willing to sift through weekly flyers and useless crap, you can find a lot of coupons that will save you a great deal of money, overall. My wife is part of some mailing lists that send you small sample packs along with coupons for purchasing the actual product. We’ve gotten free samples of coffee k-cups, laundry detergent and dish soap as well as a variety of products. And the accompanying coupon is sometimes exceptionally reasonable. Including a decent dollar amount deducted or certain percentage off the retail price, I’ve even gotten some that get you one for free. We recently got a coupon for a free package of paper towel rolls. It stands to reason that you have to use these consistently over time, in order to reap the money saving benefits;
Free Refills: Why people ignore this one has always baffled me. When you consider that the average cup of coffee will cost you about 30 cents when brewed at home, paying 2 dollars at a coffee shop for a small cup of coffee may seem ludicrous. And it is. Coffee costs pennies to brew, but most locations sell it at a several hundred percent markup. This is why you should take the sting out of your overall costs by taking advantage of free refills. Not every place does this, but many if not most do. It can be difficult to get a free refill if you’re grabbing tour coffee on the way to the office, but here in Saskatchewan there are a few locations that will grant you a refill if you present your receipt and it’s from the same day;
Check in Early And Check Out Late: I stay in hotels quite frequently, especially since my eye injections happen about three hours away and dragging my children with me to make it a day trip causes unnecessary suffering. So, I usually stay in a hotel room for the night. Now, I don’t think I need to explain that hotel rooms are expensive. But they are. Most locations are willing to accommodate an early check-in, so long as you give them advanced notice. Some may even want to know why but in my case, telling them I have a medical appointment shortly and need to check in prior as I won’t be able to once it’s completed usually satisfies them. And I like to make a point of waking up a bit on the later side and enjoy a quiet coffee (which is usually included in the room) and I never check out until the actual check-out time or later, if they’ll permit. This guarantees that I’m getting the most bang for my buck. Not least of all is the fact that most hotels will offer things that also help mitigate cost, including free sundries, complimentary breakfasts, water bottles and as I mentioned previously, coffee. Gotta have coffee!
There you have it. It’s a short list and it won’t make you a millionaire, but every little bit can help, right? Sometimes it takes a bit of effort to save a few bucks here and there, but with the rising cost of everything, it can be worth shopping the sales, using coupons and taking advantage of free items. What are some of your favourite cost-saving methods? Feel free to share some of them in the comment section. ☯
Sometimes it feels as though I’ve worn a uniform my entire life… From a very young age, I started wearing a karate gi. Throughout my teens and twenties I found myself falling the old school route where I wore a fast food and a pharmacy uniform as I worked jobs to get me through high school and college. I started wearing security uniforms in my 20’s during the chaotic period when I still wasn’t quite sure what I wanted to do with my life. The, I stepped into my chosen career and the wearing of a uniform became second nature, despite the fact I had been wearing one in some way, shape or form for almost twenty years prior to that.
Yesterday, I started a new job in which I get to enjoy the pleasure of being dressed in a very different kind of uniform. Some may look at this photo and say, “That’s not a uniform…” And you’d be right, in the traditional sense. But how one dresses for a job is a representation of the quality of work one intends to DO on the job, and I feel it’s important to dress well for one’s position. Plus, I love suits. I F&*KIN’ LOVE SUITS!!!
There’s nothing complex or complicated about this morning’s post. No deep-rooted philosophical lesson or long-winded explanation about some function of the body, a martial arts technique or what Diabetic issue is currently throwing a monkey wrench into my life. Just a quick, simple post to share a happy moment with all of you. Yesterday was amazing, albeit a very different kind of exhausting than I’m used to. I have some excellent and professional people I work with, which made the first day all the more smooth. But it didn’t help that I missed my scheduled bus to get home, meaning I had to stand in a snowstorm for about twenty five minutes until the next one came along. Live and learn.
It’s a new routine for the entire family, with everyone making adjustments as working from home is solely my wife’s arena, now. But by the time I finally DID get home last night, it’s a fair assumption to say that we were both exhausted and we crashed very shortly after the kids did. That’s usually a sure sign of a day’s work well done. Now, as I step into my second day I have a clear idea of how my day will go and what to expect. Adjustments will be made, systems will adjust and a routine will develop. All will be well. Except for the snow. The snow needs to take a snow day. Pun fully intended. ☯
Siblings can be a Light-send, despite the occasional rivalry. Not only do they share blood ties, they can be your backup in times of trouble, a welcome celebrater in times of joy and a tandem member of the same generation with whom you can grow up and share the memories of life with. This makes it all the more tragic when one of these siblings leaves this life before they were rightfully intended. This also brings me to my older brother, Stéphane.
On this day 30 years ago, in the early morning hours, I was awoken by my mother who told me that we had to get dressed and get to the hospital as my brother was comatose and would likely die before sunrise. Being as I was only 13 years old, my concept of death held no comfort for me and in fact, simply told me that I would be losing my only sibling and never see him again after this visit. This was mixed with the unhealthy belief I had developed from years of seeing him “on the brink,” only to come out of it and be released from the hospital a few short days later. The first night of my life that I was wrong would prove to be the last night of his.
We arrived at the hospital shortly after midnight. We were met at the elevator as we exited on my brother’s floor, by our family doctor and long-time friend, Dr. Edward Furlong. Some readers from New Brunswick (if there are any for this post) may recognize that name as he was also the Minister of Health and subsequently, Minister of Education for New Brunswick during the first decades of the 2000’s. He greeted us solemnly and walked us to my brother’s room. We could hear his moans floating down the hallway, which elicited my first and only question of the night: “I thought he was in a coma?” The doctor explained that he was, but that some unresponsive people could still make sound, under certain circumstances.
I walked into a scene that until that point, I had only seen on television. My brother was lying on his back with his head slightly elevated. He had tubes coming out of both arms, his nose and all about his head. There were multiple machines with displays, beeping and moving with a measurable rhythm. And once or twice every minute, a low moan of pain escaped from my brother’s unpainted lips. The scene immediately melted any illusions I had for his survival, as similar scenes I’d scene in movies were usually one that accompanied death, soon after. I broke into tears at the realization that this genuinely was the last night I would see my brother alive.
My parents discussed providing me with a private room so that I could potentially get some sleep as it was expected to be an extremely long night. My parents held fast to the belief that my brother would pull through, so they had unfounded expectations I would be going to school the following day. I was brought to an unoccupied room on the other side of the hospital’s wing, a fact which would become important, later in the story. I took off my shoes and slipped under the starched hospital sheets. Although it was the middle of the night and I was exhausted, I obviously couldn’t fall asleep.
I was pretty much a sobbing mess, thinking about all the times when I’d been frustrated and angry with my brother. Instead of focusing on all the good memories, thoughts of all the times we fought or disagreed came to mind, generously sprinkled with the number of times I said harsh or cruel words to him. I instantly regretted each and every one of them and swore a silent oath to make it up to him if I were ever given the opportunity, painfully unaware the chance would never present itself. I was visited frequently by either of my parents, Dr. Furlong and the score of nurses who were keeping an eye on me. I couldn’t hear my brother from where I was, but the constant visits kept me on edge as I kept expecting every person to be the one who would ultimately bring bad news.
Short minutes after the 3 a.m. hour I finally fell into a peaceful sleep, which would be immediately interrupted by my father who had come to announce that my brother had passed away, almost to the very minute that I had fallen asleep. At the risk of sounding creepy, my mother’s side of the family has been often known for strange coincidences such as this. But even the nurse who had been keeping an eye on me was able to confirm that I had fallen asleep almost to the minute that my brother finally passed. I like to think of it as his way of sharing some much-needed peace as he finally obtained his.
The weeks that followed were a blur and quite surreal. At my young age, I had unfortunately attended funerals before but never for a member of my immediate family. During the funeral viewings over two days, I sat a chair next to his coffin and never left his side, painfully aware that once that lid was closed I would never set eyes on my older brother again. It was the greatest sense of loss I had ever felt in my life to that point, for a much needed life lesson that nobody wants. Once the funeral was over, my parents and I took a trip up the Gaspé coast to get away for a bit. It was a pleasant trip, but there was always something to remind me that our family unit was a member short. And always would be.
So, why would I choose to write about this today? Well, besides the fact that today marks the 30th anniversary of his death (despite not being something one celebrates) it also dawned on me that I usually observe this day privately and I’ve never written my thoughts on how that night impacted me. And I believe it’s important. I’ve written about my brother before, and I can tell you that his personality and willingness to fight to live and survive was passed on to me. He is the biggest inspiration in my life in relation to fighting the odds, no matter what. I attribute my ability to never give up and think positive to him. He was certainly more of a teacher to me than he was ever aware.
My brother Stéphane (Left) and I
At the end of all things, his cause of death was heart failure, despite the multitude of health issues that could have done him in sooner. There is great irony in the fact that despite being a young man with the biggest heart, his heart was what finally gave out. I guess that makes sense as his heart was always what he used most. Even now, 30 years after the fact, I’m still brought to tears while writing these words. Considering I’m not the most emotional dude on the block (some rocks show more emotion than I usually do) this goes a long way towards showing the impact he had on my life, for as short a time as we were together.
Hold your loved ones close, dear readers. I often say that life doesn’t care about one’s plans. And we never know when we may lose someone near and dear, or when this life ends for ourselves. It warms my heart to know that my son Nathan now has a younger brother, Alex. Whether he realizes it or not, it’s comforting to know that he’ll have some backup, should anything ever happen to my wife and I. Even now, I pray you’re resting in peace, brother. Whether in this life or the next, I’m confident we’ll see each other again. ☯
I don’t think I need to explain that people take most common, everyday things for granted. I experience this a lot because despite the advancements I’ve lived through in the past 38 years, it’s difficult to move around without a SIGNIFICANT amount of supplies. The fact that I’m fed up of it likely makes it sound way worse than it is. But eventually, a guy gets tired of carrying around a man purse just so that he can run some errands throughout the morning without concern. The “for granted” aspect comes in because most people fail to recognize how lucky they are to be able to just step out of the house with abandon.
A week ago, I decided that I would sit through a specific bus route that I would be using for work. This was so that I could time out my entry into the city in the mornings without the concern of being late. Alexander was napping, Nathan was gone to school and my wife was hard at work in front of her own computer, so I felt it was a good opportunity to go out for an hour or two. I started to pack my usual shoulder sling of supplies, when a wave of impatience struck me and I decided to go in a different direction.
I tested my blood. Perfectly normal with no insulin “on board.” Good. I took some sinus medication so that I wouldn’t suffocate through the wearing of a mask in public for a couple of hours. Excellent. That shit’s supposed to last a few hours, anyway. I had my wallet and identification, and I grabbed a face mask and stepped out the door. I waited a matter of minutes at the bus stop and after a 22-minute bus ride, I was in the downtown core and stepping into the local shopping centre.
Not my mall, by the way. I didn’t want to be the creepy dude snapping photos in the mall.
I spent about an hour and a half downtown, walking around and browsing through some of the shops before grabbing the bus for the return journey. My blood sugars didn’t bottom out, I didn’t die and I didn’t find myself needing anything that I would usually pack and drag along. It felt really nice, being able to just step out of the house and go somewhere. It felt “non-diabetic.” I’d like to say it felt normal, but I’ve had Type-1 Diabetes for so damn long that being Diabetic feels normal to me.
I’ve managed to compress what I carry throughout the course of a day into one small, single-shouldered sling and it usually contains the following:
Fast-Acting Carbohydrates: I favour jellybeans as they seem to work fastest for me;
Nasal Spray: I’ve had some mild sinus issues since childhood and occasionally need a spritz. Wearing a face mask also makes it harder to breathe;
Blood Glucose Meter: Besides the fact that my insulin pump seems to be a temperamental bitch who screams at me every couple of hours despite smooth blood sugars, frequent blood sugar testing is still required to ensure the proper calibration of my CGM. Plus, should there be an issue with the CGM, I need to have the ability to properly ascertain my blood sugar levels; and
Extra Supplies: This is a broad one, but it can involve anything, including spare pump supplies, extra insulin or added lancets and strips. There can be a lot more, depending on the situation.
Most of the time, it’s just for when I go out. But realistically, when I travel to Saskatoon overnight, I often opt for something small and portable to carry. Considering I travel up, get the injections, sleep it off then drive right back down the following day, I make a point not to pack a huge suitcase. There are no nights out on the town, requiring extra clothing or special stuff. But when I make a point to stop and take notice, I really never leave the house without bringing a whole shwack of crap! This comes from years of situations where I’ve developed a “better to have it and not need it” mentality, as it relates to Diabetes.
It felt nice to be out for a few hours without dragging a bunch of stuff. I almost felt normal, walking among people. Note that I said “almost.” Besides, as I said earlier, I’ve had Diabetes for so long that it seems normal to ME. I can hear some friends thinking, “Shawn? Normal…?” Come on, guys! Give me a break! I’m about as normal as I’m ever going to get. But seriously, if you’ve ever had a friend text you to randomly go for coffee or you’ve decided to go sit through a movie on a whim, appreciate that freedom for what it is. There are so many things that a Type-1 Diabetic needs to consider before leaving the house that it almost makes it tedious to do so. Don’t take the little freedoms for granted. Sometimes, they’re the best ones. ☯
Believe it or not, April Fools, which is an unofficial holiday celebrated on April 1st, has been around for hundreds of years and is observed across the world by playing pranks or jokes on an unassuming person. This is usually followed by yelling “April Fools” when the prank has been executed. You may not get this unless you speak French, but I found an article on History.com that explains that the origins of April Fools potentially dates back to when France switched from the Julian to the Gregorian calendar. Those who were behind the times and still celebrated the New Year during the last week of March/first week of April were considered “April Fools” and would often have pranks played on them, such as sticking paper fish on their backs. This is why in French, these folks would be called “poisson d’avril,” which would have been nice to know when I was a kid. But I digress…
I thought that today, instead of a top-heavy post with tons of information, I’d keep things light and share some of the pranks I’ve had played on me through the decades. I can honestly admit that I was never one to play the pranks, myself. I usually found myself being on the receiving end. So without further ado, here are some of the top pranks I’ve had played on me by others…
Years ago, I was a manager for a fast-food chain and was working a tandem shift with another manager through a reasonably busy dinner period. Some of the younger staff knew me as an easy-going supervisor and had no qualms about pranking me. At one point, I get told that the employee at the drive thru window badly needed change for the customer currently at her window. They said it was a rush, since it was holding up the line. I responded accordingly and ran down the drive thru hallway, which my loyal staff had sprinkled with floor soap (without the water). The result was my so-called “no slip” shoes sending me careening down the hallway and slamming into a wall, with half a dozen teenagers laughing hysterically as I picked myself up. I thought having them mop up the soap would have been deserved justice, but they considered it a small price to pay for the laughs they got.
Some time ago, I was working at my computer and I had my supervisor come running past me while strapping on his gear saying, “Come on, Shawn! We have an emergency, we gotta go!” I jumped out of my seat, grabbed my coat and slammed my arm through the sleeve only to be rewarded by a showering spray of shredded paper flying out of the hand-hole and littering the floor. My co-workers dropped their panicked facade and doubled over laughing, once again making me the butt of the joke. Don’t even get me started on how my field coach used to throw a quick squirt of pepper spray into my morning coffee when I wasn’t looking…
There’s a lot more, but some of it isn’t suitable for print and some are rather embarrassing. I know, I know… That’s probably the good stuff you’d love to ACTUALLY hear about. But I also want to keep this post reasonably short. The point is, I’ve never really been much of one for playing pranks, but they can be fun in the right context. The important thing is to make sure you do nothing that has the potential to cause damage or injure anyone. And if playing pranks on your co-workers, be sure to keep it appropriate to the work environment AND the person you’re doing it on. We don’t all have the same sensibilities… ☯
The Blogging Buddhist 