When one becomes a parent, we usually hope and pray that our children will inherit our better traits and values. We hope that they’ll be strong, healthy and develop a wisdom that will allow them to push forward and make a positive presence within the world. At least, that’s what I hope for my sons. But of course, life rarely cares about one’s plans and things don’t always turn out the way we’d LIKE them to. This is why, instead of a strong martial arts acumen or a love of books or making exercise and fitness a priority within his life, my son has chosen one of my lesser-enjoyed traits: he’s a fuckin’ klutz…
Now, don’t get me wrong… I love Nathan. He’s my first-born son, he looks like me, clings to me and watches my every move. So when I say he’s a klutz, I say it with affection albeit a mild tinge of frustration since there are so many other aspects he could have prominently at the forefront. Last week, while walking on my at-home treadmill, he wiped out. This caused him to face plant and roll on his shoulder off the edge of the treadmill’s belt. He busted open his upper lip and bruised his right shoulder pretty good.
He worked it off like a champ, despite my letting him know it was okay to cry a bit if he needed to let it out. What was worrisome is that he still had a week of school left. In my experience, some school staff become a little overzealous and will assume some dark things when they see a child come to school with new injuries. And even though I don’t think Nathan would lie or make something upon, children have an unfortunate propensity for making shit up if they think it sounds cool or they’re trying to please or agree with another adult.
Luckily, he made it to the school finish line without an issue but that didn’t stop him from hurting himself further. once school was done, my wife took the boys out shopping on the day before Canada Day. Since we were heading into the summer, she bought Nathan one of those plastic tubes that spray water. You know the ones; you stick the tip in water and pull back the tube and it fills, then you push hard and it can squirt almost twenty feet. Well, she got him one of those on the condition that he not use water in the backyard without my permission and that it wasn’t an “everything” toy… It was only to be used with water.
So while we’re hanging out outside last week (this was on the same day that a rabbit came to visit), he had been playing with the water tube, using a bucket I made available and told him he could refill it a couple of times, not wanting to waste TOO much water. he came running into the garage at one point with tears in his eyes and showed me his arm, as pictured above. I asked him what happened and he told me he pinched his arm with the water tube.
Now, I’m pretty good at picturing things and I have a pretty solid imagination. But I just COULDN’T wrap my head around how in the holy hell that he managed to hurt himself that way. I had him demonstrate and even to his credit, it took him a couple of tries before he could replicate exactly HOW he had managed to hurt himself. Turns out he was holding the tube almost rifle-style, with the plunger in his right hand against his left pec and pulling the tube towards him instead of pushing the plunger towards the tube.
The result was he pinched his flesh and caused the abrasion in the crook of his arm. All things considered, I think that hurt him and had him more upset than smashing his face did. It didn’t stop him from playing further, but I couldn’t help but think that only my son would be that awkward as to cause an injury with something completely safe that shouldn’t have caused said injury. Que sera… I’ll take his being clumsy and self-injurious over his being diagnosed with Diabetes, any day. ☯️