Quit Apologizing…

Society is very much divided into two parts; those who seem compelled to apologize for everything they do and those who seem to feel they are entitled to the moon and all its sand without any thought or care of others. This is a pretty broad generalization, I admit, and many people fall somewhere in between of those two extremes. But for the most part, it’s pretty accurate, based on my observations.

Some people feel compelled to apologize for every day things, even if they’ve done nothing wrong. This can be a problem, bordering on the annoying, especially when it hinders conversation or required actions on the apologizer’s behalf. I recently read a really good post about things we should all stop apologizing for. They made some really good points and some of them were even funny. I thought I would share my list of top things I feel people should stop apologizing for…

Saying No: This is a big one for me, because people have a tendency to want to avoid awkwardness and try and please others. Not always, minds you but in most cases. More often than not, people will be afraid of saying no to something, either at work or in their personal lives, in order to avoid confrontation or having to explain themselves. It’s important to remember that it’s okay to say no. If you’re unable or even simply in wanting to do a particular thing, you have every right to say no and it isn’t something you should be apologizing for.

Being Sick/Ill: Another big one in my life, given how I grew up. There’s nothing worse than calling in sick or being absent due to illness and feeling you need to apologize for it. Recovering from any illness isn’t something you need to say you’re sorry about and you shouldn’t feel bad about taking the time you need to recover. I know many employers will sometimes take issue when an employee calls in sick. And some family or friends may often feel slighted if you tell them you aren’t meeting them because you’re feeling unwell. But self-care is importantly and these parties likely wouldn’t appreciate it if you spread your sickness among them.

Being Wrong: This is important because no matter what side of the argument you fall on, we’re all human and we’ll have times when we’ll be wrong about SOMETHING. It’s the height of ignorance to assume that one is always right. But even if you’re wrong about something, it’s okay to acknowledge that you were wrong, it’s important to recognize that you were wrong, if it has affected someone else. But you’re human; you shouldn’t have to apologize for making a mistake.

There are likely many more and I’m sure you can all think of some I haven’t named. These are just the top ones that grate on me when someone apologizes for it. The article I read (I wasn’t able to find it to link it, SORRY) had included passing gas… Effectively, people in a couple should stop apologizing when they pass gas in front of each other, since it’s GOING to happen as a natural function of the human body. There was more to it than that but I thought it was hilarious.

Don’t feel the need to apologize for every little thing you do. If you feel that something is a problem, then work to fix the problem. This will go much farther than saying you’re sorry for it. And if it’s something that relates to your health or self-care, you should never have to apologize for the choices you make. After all, how can you help or take care of others if you haven’t taken care of yourself, first? Food for thought… ☯️