Have you ever heard the saying that you should never go to bed angry? Of course you have! Most people at some point in their adult lives have heard that saying. It used to be an important staple of relationship advice and previous generations stuck to it like glue. In fact, it’s even quoted in the Bible. Don’t believe me? Check out Ephesians 4:26 and tell me that Paul wasn’t talking about this exact thing.
Realistically, trying never to go to bed angry is an outdated and archaic way of looking at things. And it doesn’t just refer to marriage. It applies to most relationships, regardless of their nature and/or type. There are some sources that explain that going to bed angry can actually be helpful.
According to an article posted by Psychology Today, people tend to fight over nothing when they’re tired. They’ll even fight over issues that wouldn’t faze them if they were well-rested. The worst part is, resolving whatever the issue is winds up being more difficult due to the fatigue. The same can be said of trying to resolve a problem when you’re hungry.
Going to bed while you’re still angry is not only a good idea, it can lend some significant benefits. The fact is, you’ll likely be rested, refreshed and able to approach whatever got your hackles up with a renewed perspective. You may avoid saying something stupid because you were too tired. And as I said earlier, this applies to all relationships.
There are days when my 5-year old makes me angry as hell. Strange how kids can get under one’s skin sometimes, right? Rather than lose my temper and yell at him, I usually prefer to distance myself and let him go to bed. Once I’ve got a proper night’s sleep (or some close approximation) I can deal with the previous night’s issue with a better frame of mind.
The old school way of thinking isn’t always wrong; this just happens to be one of those times when it falls short of what’s necessary. So when tempers flare, don’t be afraid to take a step back. After all, “sleep on it” may be more beneficial than “never go to bed angry.” But what do I know? I’ve never fought with my wife before bed. ☯