Here I Sit, All Broken Hearted… 💔

You know, I consider myself to be a pretty reasonable man. I believe in hearing both sides of the story and getting to the truth of the matter. This is likely one of the reasons that I work in the industry that I do; because I like getting at the truth. So if there’s one thing that seriously grinds my gears, it’s a lack of communication or lack of clarity on someone’s part. Especially when it comes at my expense! You know, for a Buddhist, I sure do get angry and frustrated a lot… I think I have some work to do! 🙏

To make a long story short, I travelled back to New Brunswick yesterday for an opportunity that I had hoped would see my family and I move back here permanently. My intention was to share the journey with all of you, hence yesterday’s post “Here We Go Again…” The next few days were intended on being chapters of that journey, rather a bit like last September’s “A Strange Odyssey”. That’s not what’s happened.

I attended a scheduled appointment this morning in New Brunswick. That appointment was scheduled for 11:30 a.m. and like the good little soldier that I am, I walked into that appointment at 11:15 and checked in at the reception counter. I was asked to take a seat and wait. So, I waited. 11:30 came and went. 11:45… 12:00… Something must be wrong..? What’s going on..? I text my wife and tell her what’s happening. She asks if I checked in upon arrival. I respond that I did. 12:15… 12:30… Something is definitely wrong… 12:45… Enough is enough. I ask the receptionist to call back and ask about this, because even if I’m the interviewee and should be a good boy and wait, an hour and a half beyond my scheduled appointment time is excessive, even if there is some kind of emergency. Someone should have come to find me by now.

The person with whom I have been corresponding, comes out and tells me that she never received my confirmation email that I was attending. I advise her that I sent one and was willing to show her. She advised that she had called the interviewer back and he would be back shortly. I started my interview almost two hours AFTER my scheduled time and if I do say so myself, crushed it! The interviewer was pretty clear that he shared that perspective. Less than two hours after the completion of the interview, I was emailed and advised that I wasn’t selected to continue with their process.

“I Mean, You Shouldn’t Be Asking People To Come Down Here And Pay The Freight On Something They Paid That Still Ain’t Good Enough. I Mean, You Think That’s Right? I Mean, Maybe You’re Doing Your Job But Why You Gotta Stop Me From Doing Mine? ‘Cause If You’re Willing To Go Through All The Battling You Gotta Go Through To Get Where You Wanna Get — Who’s Got The Right To Stop You? I Mean, Maybe You Guys Got Something You Never Finished, Something You Really Wanna Do, Something You Never Said To Somebody, SOMETHING! And You’re Told No, Even After You Pay Your Dues? Who’s Got The Right To Tell You That? Who? Nobody! It’s Your Right To Listen To Your Gut. It Ain’t Nobody’s Right To Say “No” After You Earned The Right To Be Where You Wanna Be And Do What You Wanna Do.”

– Rocky Balboa

Much like Sylvester Stallone’s character from the above quote mentioned, I fully acknowledge that the older I get, the more things I need to leave behind. That’s life. But eventually it gets just a little exhausting, burning myself out, burning through my family’s savings and constantly riding an emotional roller coaster, simply to have the rug pulled out even when I assume it’s going well and looks promising.

It would have been nice if they could have communicated more… Perhaps provide some reasoning as to why I would not be permitted to continue, especially when one considers flights, hotel, vehicle rentals and meals that are all out of my own pocket from the other side of the country! It’s definitely brutal.

Now, I sit in a hotel room, which was unplanned, to await my flight home to Regina tomorrow, which should have been when the next step in the process I paid the freight to attend would happen. Alone and disappointed; 3,600 kilometres away from my wife and children. Life doesn’t care about your plan. Light knows I’ve repeated that often enough, even in this blog. But man, would it be nice if karma would swing in my direction just once. That’s all I’m asking! Just once… ☯

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Shawn

I am a practitioner of the martial arts and student of the Buddhist faith. I have been a Type 1 Diabetic since I was 4 years old and have been fighting the uphill battle it includes ever since. I enjoy fitness and health and looking for new ways to improve both, as well as examining the many questions of life. Although I have no formal medical training, I have amassed a wealth of knowledge regarding health, Diabetes, martial arts as well as Buddhism and philosophy. My goal is to share this information with the world, and perhaps provide some sarcastic humour along the way. Welcome!

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